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Category: Meaningful Connection

Due Diligence

“You’re the first person to tell me they have another company coming to give an estimate in over two months of doing this with 70+ orders per week…”

This is what a sales associate told me after giving me a price quote for getting my garage door replaced.

He seemed surprised, as did the guy who represented a different company that came before him.

My intention is simple: to do my due diligence.

I want to hear them talk… I want to hear them comment on their company and competition… I want to see what kind of offers they have and if they’ll change anything after I tell them I have other companies coming… I want to see who I align with the most…

See, the first guy who came out was good. If I caved into my lazy nature and just went with him because it was more convenient, I’m sure I wouldn’t have regretted it.

But, the guy who came today was great. He saved me close to $600 by advising me against purchasing a new motor… something the other guy didn’t even check and just added to my quote because I said, “I guess I should because I’m getting a new door, right?”

Why share this story? To serve as a reminder to do your due diligence before making an expensive or long-term decision. When one is all you have to go off of, of course you’ll justify it. But, more gives you actual bases of comparison. And even if it doesn’t save you $600, it’ll give you a vibe that allows you to invest in the type of company (people) you’d love to see thrive.

CPR for Life

Today I updated my certifications for CPR and using an AED.

We do CPR when a person is unconscious and not breathing so as to keep circulating blood throughout the body and oxygen moving in and out of the lungs to delay tissue death and organ failure until medical professionals can arrive.

Liken this to times in your life when you’ve felt metaphysically lost and like you metaphorically can’t breathe because of something awful that happened to you… and how sometimes, finding ways you can keep going through the motions of your regular, everyday life can be just as lifesaving.

CPR, however, isn’t something we do to ourselves—CPR is something we do to others.

The same in life.

When we see or sense that someone is metaphysically lost or are going through a really tough time… sometimes the best thing we can do is “manually” help them do the things they normally do on their own, but at that point in time and for whatever reason—can’t. Things like hang out with friends, go for walks, eat appropriate meals, exercise, have a night out, etc.

Which leads to my final point… like CPR, most anyone can do it. You just need to have a little bit of training, courage, compassion, and common sense.

Stay ready, y’all.

Somebody is going to need you one day…

The question is… will you be ready?

Hometown Exploration

I’m going to a martial arts conference this weekend to learn from some of the best martial artists, martial arts school owners, and associated like-minded people in my industry.

A question I’ve been reflecting on to prepare is, “How can I optimize my time there?”

I’ve been thinking about how I can maximize the number of sessions I take… the number of people I might meet… the number of opportunities I might capitalize on and uncover…

And it got me thinking…

…Why don’t I (we) do this for our everyday life more often?

At least for me… I can’t think of the last time I sat down and asked myself, “How can I optimize my time here, in my hometown, this weekend?”

Granted, most of the time all I want to do is nothing (lol).

But, every now and again, I think it’d be well worth the effort to look at our own hometown with fresh eyes… as though we were only visiting for one weekend and wanted to soak up as much of the area as possible.


Inner Work Prompt: Imagine friends were coming to visit your hometown for one weekend and they asked if you would give them the optimized experience. What kind of itinerary would you prepare? Why not do that for yourself and your own family?

Simplify People Gatherings

Don’t complicate people gatherings.

Time… place… a thing or two to do…

And let the magical depth of our incomprehensible existences express themselves and connect (once again) for a while.

So much of the loneliness we feel can be solved by simplifying our formula.


Inner Work Prompt: What’s a problem in your life that’s being made worse by complication? How can you simplify your approach?

Formula For Conversation Confidence

Oftentimes I’ll wonder to myself, “What would we even talk about?” as I think about the prospect of getting coffee or lunch with one person or another.

It can feel daunting… the idea of filling an hour or two with conversation.

And yet, it never ceases to amaze me at how seamless it goes when you have the right mix of curiosity + vulnerability/transparency + time apart.

Take that formula with you everywhere you go and I suspect you’ll find that an hour or two often isn’t enough.


P.s. In case you missed it, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.

Where Inconvenience and Love Cross

This quote has been running through my mind over the past few days—especially as I reflected on that last night with Stella:

“…I talked about how love was an action, an instinct, a response roused by unplanned moments and small gestures, an inconvenience in someone else’s favor.”

Michelle Zauner, Crying in H Mart (Page 143)

I’ve thought about love a lot and have tried to define it before.

But, when it comes to love that is pointed towards another or love that is shared… I think those six words sum it up beautifully: “…An inconvenience in someone else’s favor.”

Remember this the next time your loved ones ask you for a favor that’s inconvenient with your schedule… or when you’re feeling “too busy” to plan your next outing or date… or when they’re going through a hard time and you’re traveling or away…

…It’s precisely the inconvenience that makes a task or act special.

…An action, instinctual response, or small gesture that would’ve been easier for you not to do because of the other things you’ve gotta do (for you), but did anyway because of what it meant to the other person (which shows what the other person means to you).


P.s. In case you missed it, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week here.

Final Act Of Love

It started with pacing. An unusual restlessness. One that didn’t cease—which usually does cease—with more potty time.

Shortly thereafter, she started to excessively drool and dry heave.

Having zero suspicion of any health problems or complications, I figured she ate something she shouldn’t have in the backyard and needed to hurl it up to feel better.

It was already well into the night at this point so I decided to try and sleep and let her get out what she had to get out, in whatever way she had to do that, and I would deal with it—whatever “it” was—in the morning.

And eventually, after more pacing, dry heaving, and slobbery drooling… she laid down.

…It wasn’t until the next day that I found out she had GDV or bloat—a life-threatening condition that occurs when a dog’s stomach twists and fills with gas—and that she was likely in extreme discomfort and distress.

…And yet, she laid down.

I don’t think she slept that entire night. I think she laid down, not because she finally wasn’t restless or nauseous anymore—I think the level of pain/discomfort only got worse throughout the night—but because she saw I was trying to sleep.

…And she didn’t want to disrupt or inconvenience me any further.

It was a final act of love.

One I tried so f*cking hard to return when, in addition to GDV, a large tumor was found in her side, and I gave her the softest, most comfortable landing I could possibly conceive.