Category: Experiential Living

Last night it was pouring.

Buckets of water falling from the sky mixed with trash can toppling winds.

It would’ve been so easy for me to excuse myself from taking my dog on her daily walk.

But, we went anyway.

And I decided to completely surrender to the weather.

I didn’t try to dodge raindrops. I didn’t try to fight the wind. I didn’t try to jump the puddles.

I let myself feel it all.

I let myself feel the foundation of life as it washed across my face… the puddles we once knew so intimately as kids as they swallowed my shoes… the unrelenting, unforgiving power of nature’s wind as it thrashed me in every which direction like a rag doll being guided by a two year old.

At some point along our way in life and for some reason, we adopt a stay-dry mentality… of avoiding contact with the rain at all costs and shielding ourselves from the very nature from which we were born. And I think it affects us.

Not only from a visceral standpoint… but from a metaphorical one as well.

I’ve never attended a single organized basketball practice.

All I’ve ever done is play pick-up games and practiced on my own based on what I could come up with from previous game experiences.

Contrast this with those who only attend organized basketball practices and sit the bench for games or rarely ever play games and I’d say the former leads to faster learning than the latter.

…Which isn’t to say organized practices aren’t important.

It’s merely to say that when given the choice between play and learn from experience or practice until you feel ready to play… the former wins in what you can learn given equal time.

…Which is the case for how it works in life too, isn’t it?

Spend too much time planning and you’ll miss the crucial experiences that’ll lead to expedited growth. Things like failing, losing, messing up, missing, fouling, and so on… things that’ll lead to potent emotional experiences that’ll intensify the training and follow-up gaming.

Practicing is safe. There’s much less on the line. Which means there’s proportionally much less emotional energy being invested into the work.

Again, this isn’t to say ignore organized practice. Because the ultimate is the happy balance of the both. But, err too far on the side of caution when it comes to experiential learning and you’ll miss out on so much that you could potentially stand to gain.

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Inner Work Prompt: What have you been spending a lot of time planning? Could you stand to learn more, faster by just doing instead?

I pulled the rhomboid muscles in my back.

Here’s why: I created a daily warm up routine that included foam rolling and light stretching for essentially just my lower body.

Which, historically speaking for me, hasn’t lead to any issues and has worked out great. Especially for leg day and my martial arts training (which is pretty much leg day every time).

However, I can now see what the heavy lower body focus lead to… a lack of upper body focus.

…I haven’t been properly warming up the upper body muscles I’m using to do heavy lifting which, of course, is what lead to this injury.

So, I’ve since updated my warm up routine to be more balanced and specific to the muscle groups being utilized that day (duh moment). And I’m creatively modifying my workouts until my rhomboid injury heals.

Generally speaking, most of us operate with a “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it” kind of mentality.

Exercise related injuries, oftentimes, are an illustration that something is “broke.”

…But many of us don’t see this.

We do what we need to do to get healed and then go back to doing exactly what we were doing before—assuming it was a freak accident or some kind of “dumb luck.”

I’d argue that it’s almost always more than that…. that it’s your body’s attempt to communicate with you that something is wrong… that something isn’t being stretched, strengthened, or otherwise cared for enough.

Take a close look at what could have lead to the injury and modify your routine to include the proactive solution so it doesn’t happen the next time.

…This is experiential learning at its finest.

My car wouldn’t start this morning.

At first I thought it might’ve been because of low gas.

My next door neighbor gave me about an 1/8 of a tank’s worth.

That didn’t work.

So my next thought was battery.

My other neighbor had a portable jumper kit and jumper cables—neither worked.

So I called roadside assistance.

After several hours of waiting, I needed to call a stand-in to be there for when the roadside assistance arrived so I could go to work.

My mom stepped in.

I also needed a ride to work.

My dad stepped in.

I also needed a ride home from work.

My mom stepped in again and said if it did get towed, I could also borrow her car while the mechanic figured out what was wrong and got it fixed.

How freaking fortunate am I to have such an incredible support network just a call away?

While it sucks that my car broke down, I’m super thankful.

As I say all of the time, life happens. And when it does, not only do we have a chance to learn, but we have a chance to reach out and ask for help.

I learned I needed to be more prepared so I ordered a portable jumper kit of my own. And I’m reminded not to let my gas tank get as low as it did.

And while asking for help can sometimes feel awkward or like we’re placing a burden on others, it really just gives others a chance to give… a chance to do good… a chance to connect.

…Which is a wonderful gift when it’s met with true gratitude and a reciprocating heart. 🙂

A great strategy for living your best life, is to habitually dip into the lives of others.

There are as many different ways of living as there are people and no one person has lived them all.

But every person has probably found a few strategies that work well for them. Things that make them feel good about their life; things that make them feel joyful; things that make them feel proud.

And if we don’t allow ourselves to dip into other worlds, other perspectives, other experiences—we’ll forever be living inside of a fish tank… completely oblivious to the possibilities of the ocean.

Here; now; with what you know—is as good (or bad) as it gets… if there’s nothing to compare it to.

But, take a dip into the life of a stranger—who you happened to sit next to on a plane and ask them questions that give you a peek into their life… and you just might walk away with a golden life nugget.

Take a dip into the life of a historical figure via a fat biography—and get acquainted with the experiences that truly shaped and guided their path… and you just might end up with insight that’ll alter your trajectory.

Take a dip into the life of a family member who’s always around, but hasn’t shared much of their story—and get a glimpse into what *actually* ends up on people’s highlight reels—and you just might adjust what you’re saving onto yours… now.

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P.s. Some of the best insights I’ve ever uncovered from dips I’ve taken into other people’s lives are captured in my first guide. 18% off for a limited time ➜

There’s something primal about playing in the rain.

We spend so much of our time worrying about how we look, trying to keep dry, dodging the literal and metaphorical raindrops of our modern day world… that it almost feels rebellious and freeing to just say EFFIT! …And spend a few hours soaking in it all.

…And not only disregard how we look and disregard all cares about getting wet (physically and metaphorically)… but, allow ourselves to, as we all have at distinct times in our lives, feel the rain once again.

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P.s. I also published: 40 Bessel van der Kolk Quotes on Trauma and Healing from The Body Keeps The Score