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Category: Transforming Pain

Annual (Inner Work) Inspection

Published on October 10, 2026

I took my car into the shop today.

It’s due for it’s annual inspection and I have to get my winter tires on… not to mention it’s squeaking when I drive which is more embarrassing than I want to admit.

I’m fully expecting the mechanic to find plenty wrong as he does the inspection—it’s been a year of use with no check-ups, after all. Things will likely need to be tightened, replaced, refilled, changed, loosened, etc.—it’s the way of the world. Things will always move towards entropy. My 10+ year old car most certainly included.

…You know what else always moves towards entropy?

You.

Especially in this day and age.

And my thought today for you is simple: when’s the last time you did an annual inner self inspection? When’s the last time you did a full audit of your mental/emotional state and took inventory of at least some of the things that need to be “tightened, replaced, refilled, changed, loosened, etc.”? …Because if it’s been more than a year (hopefully not as long as you’ve been alive), it might be time.

Get an updated inspection sticker on the windshielf of your mind.

This next year of your life would be better as a result.

What Is Your Mind Circling The Most Right Now?

Published on September 26, 2026

The more your mind circles a thought… the more it’s asking you to do something about it.

I found myself thinking this week that I should send a specific text to a specific person.

The thought kept popping up randomly throughout my day… and again the next day… and the day after that…

Until I finally thumbed it out, turned invisible and abstract to black and white and then to blue bubble.

…And found myself exhaling this sigh of relief from somewhere deep.

I haven’t thought much about it since.

On the surface it seemed so trivial. A text. One that maybe took me all of 3 minutes to draft and send.

But again, what your mind continues to circle is a signal that there’s more to it than what’s perceived on the surface.

After some inner work, what I suspect that text was really about was being vulnerable and choosing to take a risk. About doing something that my greater version wouldn’t hesitate to do. About doing something that was aligned with the who I wanted to be—today.

And so I pass the question off to you: what does your mind seem to keep gravitating back to? What does it keep circling? Once you have that figured out… take a closer look… there’s probably more to it than what appears on the surface.

“You Will Get Better”

Published on September 2, 2026

In reply to an email, I caught myself typing, “You will get better.”

And then realized that was a statement I couldn’t promise.

So I deleted it and typed out, “If you keep showing up for yourself, you will keep getting better.”

Because saying to someone, “You will get better” relieves them of responsibility. It means they can do whatever they want and the outcome they desire will happen regardless. And if it doesn’t—it can be made your fault because you were the one who said it would.

No.

Better to always remind people that you can’t change their life trajectory any more than you can change who they are as a person.

…But if they’re willing to take responsibility for change in their own life… then it’s hard to see how “better” wouldn’t be a byproduct.

P.s. Ready to take control of your life’s direction? My 30-Day Guide will help you build unshakable confidence in your life’s direction without costing you thousands on life coaching.

What Do You Say To Someone Who Says To You They’re Dying?

Published on August 25, 2026

“The cancer is winning.” I was told today.

“One year. Maybe six months left to live.”

“I was doing great yesterday, but today, I’m not doing good at all.”

We sat together for a while. Both processing. Me blurting out a swear word every few minutes. Him slowly cluing me in to where his head was at.

“…I must stay positive.”

“…I have to keep trying to take class.”

“…I might be losing, but I am going to write this final chapter.”

And it was in those three lines that I think the words he needed to hear found him. All I did was emphasize, reinforce, and offer my full support.

Here’s why I think those three lines were so on point:

We must stay positive. Not delusionally positive while the world burns down around us. But strategically optimistic. So that we can see opportunity, believe that the world can be made into a better place, and trust in ourselves to act.

We must keep learning. Because if we’re not learning, we’re regressing. There is no stagnant. And what we find on the other side of our curiosities is legacy. Because curiosities lead to topic, topic leads to creation, creation leads to tribe, and tribe… well, tribe is who carries forth our legacy after we’re gone.

We must control what’s within our control. There was nothing left to do. Cancer was winning. But choosing how to spend his remaining time? Who to spend that time with? What words he wanted to author on the final pages of his life’s book? …All well within his control. And exactly where the mind should be focused when all else feels so uncontrollable.

A Primal Awakening [Poem]

Published on August 13, 2026

You’ll be back you say
As an unmissable plan
A stage. A promise. A DJ.
Rips you away.

Six hours we danced
A primal awakening
Lost. Forgotten. Found.
You—the light; my now.

I learned everything about you
Yet learned nothing at all
Stomping. Screaming. Your sound.
An ancestral introduction.

The ecstatic in you
Brought out the ecstatic in me
Mud. Goosebumps. Aroused.
…To stop that? Leave?

But plan triumphed over presence
And this, too, must end
Release. Detach. Allow.
It never gets easier.

And me? Never better.
…Back to phase: mend.

P.s. You can read all of my poems here.

Remember Your Mortality

Published on August 12, 2026

A friend and I got to talking about memento mori—the Latin phrase that means “Remember your mortality.”

I asked if she had ever heard of the Memento Mori Calendar. She said no. After I explained what it was, she said, “Oh no… that would freak me out!”

To which I replied, “That’s the point!”

You get the Memento Mori calendar, not for decoration, aesthetics, or because it’ll be a fun coloring activity for you to do… but precisely so that it’ll freak you out.

…And hopefully so much so that you’ll get busy living your life to the fullest. With fewer hesitations… more bold choices… and no regrets left when your time comes.

Because your time will come.

…It’s not a question of if… only a question of during which dot on the calendar.

Whispers From Somewhere Deep

Published on July 15, 2026

It’s weird.

When I’m stuck, thinking about what to write but can’t think of anything good to say… a word will whisper itself into my mind.

Like a mantra of sorts. A focal point for my awareness. A prompt from my meandering muse.

And it’s never at the outset. Only after I’ve struggled for a bit. Maybe 15 – 30 minutes into a good staring at the blank page session that it’ll suddenly appear…

Unprompted. Unpracticed. And weirdly unconscious.

“…Build.”

For years, this word speaks itself into existence in my mind.

And to this day, I’m not quite sure why or where it comes from.

But what I choose to believe is that whispers that come from somewhere deep, somewhere unconscious… are oftentimes far more powerful, and carry much more weight than anything the conscious is screaming, spiraling, and yapping about in the forefront.