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Category: Thinking Clearly

Creative Collaboration vs Creative Inhibition

Published on September 19, 2026

Synergy is the idea that 1 + 1 = 3.

Your results alone. Plus another person’s results alone. Equals less than the results of us working together in creative collaboration.

I’m sure you can confirm this based on previous first hand experiences in your life.

What’s also true, however, is 1 + 1 = 1.

Your results alone. Plus another person’s results alone. Equals more than the results of us working together in creative inhibition.

And I know you’ve worked with people who can confirm this idea.

So the question then becomes: who’s who in your life?

…And how can you spend more time with the people who create that synergistic effect on work results?

…But maybe most importantly (since this focuses on what’s within your control vs what’s outside of it): how can you better facilitate creative collaboration vs creative inhibition? I.e. How can you be a better synergy facilitator?

…Can you be a better listener? Can you be more kind? Can you create a more safe space? Can you ask better questions? Can you offer a more playful, fun energy? …And so on.

Because you can either invest in the above inner work to potentially create a results multiplier in your life or you can keep throwing your hands into the air, complaining, and choosing to just, “do it all yourself, because working with others is a waste of time…”

The choice is yours.

The Autistic Adult Who I Wish I Could Be More Like

Published on September 18, 2026

Yesterday, I had an autistic adult take one of my group martial arts classes.

…And I’m almost positive I left feeling more inspired than he did.

To paint you a picture, he was as excited to take this class as Hulk Hogan would’ve been to get on a microphone in the middle of a wrestling ring and talk smack to a crowd of raging “Hulkamania” fans.

He was practicing his moves (which he hadn’t learned yet) in the office one-way mirrors, was excitedly greeting everybody who walked past to tell them he was going to be “battling for his new belt” today, and had about a thousand and one questions about martial arts and the school and myself that never quite satiated his appetite—and this was all before the class even started.

Once I got him into the class, he enthusiastically did every bow and handshake and followed each respectful tradition requested… he put his entire life force into each of the techniques taught… and he gave off an infectious energy to the other students he worked with that rippled its way around the room and raised the vibration of the whole class.

By the time the class was over… it was evident he had a blast. He couldn’t stop asking when he could come back and what other moves he could do and how he could get his white belt.

And yet ironically, it was I who found myself thinking, “I wish I was more like him.”

Completely present. Wholly engaged. Infectiously enthusiastic.

…Seemingly zero other worries or concerns in the world.

I’m Still In

Published on September 11, 2026

A reminder from Mark Manson: “It’s easy to mess up and spiral into, ‘Screw it, I give up.’ It’s harder—but infinitely more valuable—to say: ‘That didn’t go as planned. I’m still in.’“

Say it when you fall down. Say it when you miss. Say it when you come up short. Say it when you fail. Say it when you get no results. Say it when you’ve slept in…

…I’m still in.

Let it become your daily mantra: I’m still in.

Repeat it until it becomes your new inner dialogue: I’m still in.

Be so flexible in your approach, so resilient in the face of adversity, so relaxed in your pivots and adjustments… that life has no choice but to relent.

When you’re the one who relents… by giving up… of course you don’t win.

But never forget… it’s never really about the outcome, the final score, the destination…

It’s about winning the daily battle… to stay in.

A Few Someones

Published on September 10, 2026

I was never the most popular in school.

But I was also never the least.

I was athletic enough to get along with most of the sports types. I was smart enough to get along with most of the intellectual types. I was rebellious enough to get along with most of the party types. I was well-tempered enough to get along with most of the angry and angsty types. And I was empathetic enough to get along with most of the outcasted and alone types.

I’m not sure if this was because I had a relatively high emotional/social intelligence or because I knew how to change the colors of my personality as quickly as a chameleon running from a kestrel during peak autumn foliage.

But the thing about getting along with everyone, is that you don’t get to go deep in getting along with a few someones.

And while I’ve had some incredibly deep relationships throughout my life, I sometimes find myself changing colors faster than I can converse deeply with those of the last color I just changed from. And just as I’m settling into that new color—I look down and see my pigment changing yet again.

If the chameleon analogy holds true, then I don’t think being only one color is the answer—what a waste of a superpower, am I right?

…But maybe running around like nature’s LED isn’t the answer either.

What Fun Isn’t Tied To

Published on September 8, 2026

During a night out with friends this past weekend, I had more fun doing car karaoke in the 30-minute commute to and from a California club than I did in the club itself featuring a DJ that has 300+ million streams on Spotify where we spent 4 hours.

Just another reminder that fun isn’t tied to cost, length, or prestige.

Fun is tied to perspective.

…And bringing a deliberate and intentional fun into your perspective is often all that’s really needed.

On Splitting Parenting Responsibilities

Published on September 6, 2026

On a flight to San Diego, California, I got to talking with a mom who had two kids.

On the topic of parenting, she mentioned that her and her husband split the responsibilities 50/50… but not in the way you might think.

One day, she will do 100% of the parenting roles. Including meal prep, transportation, chores, homework assistance, bedtime, etc. And while she’s doing that, the husband gets time to himself to eat out, spend time with friends, relax from chores, do his own extracurricular activities/hobbies, do inner work, etc.

On the next day, the husband will do 100% of the parenting roles and the wife gets to do whatever she would like in the same above mentioned ways.

They’ve been doing it this way for years and she said it works incredibly well for them. The reason? They’re not both trying to do all of the above mentioned things—parenting and personal work—all at the same time.

…Which usually results in a fulfilling completion of none of it for anybody.

Instead they’re giving each other a chance to focus on one specific avenue—parenting or personal work—and allowing for enough space and time to do it in full.

Are You Still Sleeping On This?

Published on August 30, 2026

Listening to poetry makes me want to compose poetry. Therefore, I should listen to more poetry.

Watching incredible martial artists perform makes me want to train martial arts. Therefore, I should watch more incredible martial artists perform.

Seeing people act kindly, thoughtfully, and truthfully makes me want to do the same. Therefore, I should surround myself with people who act as such as frequently as I’m able.

What comes in through the senses begets more of the same back out. Choosing (controlling) what comes in is still a highly underrated strategy for controlling what comes back out.