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Category: Meaningful Connection

Before You Commit

Published on May 9, 2022

Before you commit to a serious relationship, check how this person:

  1. Treats others who can’t do anything for them.
  2. Acts/reacts when they’re angry/upset.
  3. Responds to boundaries.

Of course everything is great when everything is great.

To really get to know the person you’re talking to, see how everything is when things get challenged.

Because life is challenging more often than it’s not and the last thing you want is to be stuck solving problems with somebody who acts the opposite of how they do when everything is great.

The Right People

Published on April 27, 2022

You can be plump in the middle of a crowd and still feel lonely.

Lonely doesn’t have to do with being around people.

It has to do with being around the right people.

How do you find the right people you ask?

When you stop turning left, of course.

No, seriously.

You find yourself in the wrong groups because you’re turning into them. If you’re not connecting with the people on your “left,” go “right.”

In other words, question the choices you’re making. Are the people around you making you feel seen, heard, and connected? Or the opposite? Likewise, do you feel like you can genuinely see, hear, and connect with those around you? Or not so much?

If the vibe is off then it’s time to honor new curiosities; learn new skills; join new clubs; try new challenges; volunteer with new organizations—it’s time to turn “right.”

And if you’re having a hard time figuring out what “right” might look like, then you need to spend more time with yourself.

Because if you aren’t connected with yourself (and your own aptitudes/interests/curiosities), how is anybody else supposed to be able to connect with you?

Step 1: Figure out who you are.

Step 2: Go where people like you go.

Step 3: Introduce yourself to those people.

Step 4: Make friends with those who introduce themselves back.

The Pre-Req To Connection

Published on April 17, 2022

The solution to loneliness isn’t exotic destinations.

…It’s connection.

And connection happens when you say to the world: “This is who I am.”

Rather than waiting for the world to notice you and, at best, say: “This is who you’re going to be.”

Because how can anyone else connect with you if you aren’t first connected with yourself?

Love, Like Death [Poem]

Published on April 1, 2022 
The size of your love for another
Isn’t equal to the size of love
the other receives

The most beautiful love letter ever written
Pales in comparison
to a simple hug from the one that’s right

If there’s anything I’ve learned from love in this life
It’s that love, like death,
isn’t something you get to decide

Don’t Say Forever [Poem]

Published on March 9, 2022 
Don’t say forever
Like you know what that means
You’ve been here but a blink
And in but a fraction of that
You promise the rest of time
Like you know what that means.

Here's what I think you mean:
The size of my feelings
Feels like the size of forever
Squeezed into the size of this moment
And it's bursting at its seams.
If there's one thing I really want you to say
—It's exactly what you mean.

Because here's what I know:
This smallest piece
Of the greatest whole
Becomes our greatest whole
When it is no longer just a piece.
The size of what we have right here
—Is all we'll ever be able to truly give and receive.

So, before you give away
A bursting moment for an overused cliché
Package the size of your feelings
Within the size of this moment
And give this one complete gift to me
Where you're still able to feel and say
—Exactly what you mean.

(Distracted) Experts

Published on March 4, 2022

Surround yourself with people who are growth-minded.

  • Readers
  • Creators
  • Experimenters

Not people who are distraction-oriented.

  • Haters
  • Partiers
  • Netflixers

Being around growth will make you want to grow.

…Even more than being around (distracted) experts in your field.

Communicating Love

Published on February 22, 2022

Saying: “I love you.”

And holding the door, putting down the phone, setting the table, cleaning the dishes, picking up the kids, making the bed, helping prep dinner, baking a surprise desert, giving free massages, calling just because, giving a compliment, sharing a vulnerability, thoughtfully replying to messages, randomly showing affection—all with a big smile on your face…

Both communicate love.

But in powerfully different ways.