Category: Meaningful Connection

Two things that make tough times easier are 1) connections and 2) tough spirit.

Some of the deepest and truest connections are formed during tough times. And it’s worth remembering that when people are going through tough times—while it may be tough to be there to support them because of not knowing what to say or awkwardness or free flowing emotions—that’s precisely when connections are most prone to deep bonding.

So, when someone is in need, even if they’re not an immediate friend or even are somebody who’s on the outer banks of your circle of connection—reach out in spite of the resistance you might feel. You just might end up being the synchronicity or guardian angel they’ve been hoping for.

…And from my experience—the more you’ve been a guardian angel for others, the more guardian angels you tend to have yourself.

And as far as tough spirits go… we build those by doing tough things. This means we know what it’s like be utterly exhausted and still push forward. We know what it’s like to be sick or in pain and still find a way. We know what it’s like to stare an obstacle in the face, feel the fear, and own the fear by doing the damn thing anyway.

Not in a dumb way, of course. But, in the smartest way(s) possible.

Today, I found a gift I never gave.

It was two books wrapped with an enclosed card.

What I wrote was something sentimental and specific to the person and what they were going through at a specific time. An offering of some ideas that they might hold on to to help them carry on. And the books, of course, were thematically related to this notion.

The reason I never gave the gifts was because they slid into an out of sight position in my car and after a while, I just forgot about them completely. Once I rediscovered them, it was way past the occasion for the gift and so I just left them.

And it makes me wonder… had I gotten those gifts to that person, how might it’ve changed them? Would the words have landed? Would the books have made an impact?

Or would it have been a notion that was temporarily appreciated and then forgotten about? Would the words have fallen flat? Would the books have just been stored on their shelves and left unread?

Which makes me think… is it possible to give a gift and not have it make some type of impact on the other person? Even if the words didn’t strike a chord… even if the books weren’t read… is it possible to offer something so thoughtful and human without changing the other even one tenth of a degree in a better direction?

To which I’d say… after thinking about it… I don’t think so.

P.s. In case you missed it, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.

Want to learn how to have better conversations? Ask better questions.

Want to learn how to become more interesting? Become more interested.

Want to learn how to more smoothly break the ice? Subtract as much hesitation as you can and simply shoot your first question.

Curiosity is the key to great conversation.

And if you’re worried about awkward silences, here’s a pro-tip I learned from a friend: lean into the silence and let it linger. Think carefully about what’s been said and construct your next question without haste. You might be surprised how often people will reflexively fill that void first and offer additional thoughts for your curiosity to chew on.

Finally, when engaging in casual conversation, a bit short is always better than a bit long.

…Because a bit short implies there were some curiosities that weren’t fully explored—which is an excellent opener for your next interaction.

P.s. How To Have Great Conversations in 7 Steps ➜