Category: Identity

• Wise
• Loyal
• Humble
• Generous
• Admirable
• Respectful
• Dependable

…Aren’t character traits you can give yourself.

They can only ever be gifted to you by others—regardless of how much you believe it, say it, or fight for it (them).

Some things can only ever be proven through action.

Side note: there is an argument to be made for the situation when you’re surrounded by people who simply don’t give gifts of any kind. People who are so consumed in their own worlds that they don’t have the capacity or capability to gift these rare character titles to others. And if that’s the case, remember, getting the rare character titles gifted to you isn’t the point. The point is to embody the rare character traits because of the innate goodness that doing so provides in value for you and your life. Getting the title should never be the expectation; only the rare, unexpected (and greatly appreciated) gift.

…If you want to get the rare character title of appreciative, that is.

P.s. January 26th was the anniversary of Kobe Bryant’s tragic death. I wrote a piece honoring his legacy here.

You become what you study; study what you want to become.

You become who you speak with; speak with who you want to become.

You become what you think carefully about; think carefully about what (and who) you want to become.*

*Thinking carefully implies deliberate conscious effort, not what happens unconsciously throughout the day. We’re talking about the kind of thinking that happens when you ask and mentally sweat over tough questions. Questions that challenge your limiting beliefs, comfort zones, life path, ingrained habits, close relationships, identity, vision, beliefs, and so on. Yes, this is the kind of thinking that shapes who you will ultimately become.

P.s. In case you missed it, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.

If you lack confidence, it’s not something you can just pull from thin air or positive thinking.

Confidence is something that is built tangibly—in reality.

It’s something that requires a stacking of little successes that slowly… slowly… build a track record we can start to believe in.

If we have never done a thing successfully—ever—even in a small way, of course we’ll have a crippling lack of confidence.

Confidence comes when we get out of our head and get focused on doing more in the world—one small, aligned success at a time.

P.s. I asked: What gets you to do the thing you know you need to do when you REALLY DON’T want to do it? I hope the replies help. :)

We don’t start acting like our highest self once we become them… at some distant and arbitrary point in the future.

We visualize, channel, and call upon the thoughts/ beliefs/ actions of our highest self NOW and slowly, slowly…

After having acted like them for long enough… embody and become them in a not-so-distant and deliberate point in the upcoming present.

I was surprised when I saw Willow performing scream metal on SNL.

And I was also surprised to read how many people were hating on her for it.

Because what I saw was somebody who was smiling, dancing, passionate, absorbed, and fully expressing what appeared to be her authentic self.

Maybe scream metal is what joy looks like for Willow? Why throw hate on that? Maybe if we each could express ourselves as unapologetically as Willow, we’d be screaming with full, raw emotion too.

Assuming this really is Willow’s authentic sense of expression and does give her a sense of joy… imagine her copying and pasting the lifestyle of, say, Kylie Jenner instead.

Not that there’s anything inherently wrong with Kylie Jenner’s lifestyle, but copied and pasted onto Willow’s life? …I’d say it would feel completely backwards.

And what would follow probably wouldn’t be a sense of joy—even though joy is what Kylie (probably) gets from her lifestyle. What would follow would likely be misery, imposter syndrome, and a dulled existence.

And what we need isn’t more dull, copy-pasted humans—what we need are more humans who have come alive and who can unapologetically scream from the rooftops about it.

So, before you copy and paste someone else’s lifestyle onto your own because they appear to be joyful—uncopy and don’t paste. Look within instead. The answers are already there. You just have to give yourself permission to unapologetically express yourself.

Translated loosely: do you and forget the haters.

P.s. In case you missed it, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.

Sharing publicly a highlight-reel version of our lives feels like it’s in our best interest because it:

• Makes us “more attractive”
• May lead to more opportunities
• Can capture attention that can be leveraged

What’s really in our best interest is sharing an authentic version of our lives because it:

• Attracts an authentic tribe
• Leads to more aligned opportunities
• Captures attention from the right people

Worth mentioning that these two aren’t mutually exclusive, though.

A public presence can certainly feature both—we can have an authentic highlight-reel.

But, more often than not, the former is focused on at the expense of the latter. And our mental health pays a toll in the long-run.

P.s. I asked: “What cleanses your soul?” I hope the answers inspire you to do more of what cleanses yours.