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Category: Identity

Ego vs. Self

Underneath all of the loud, invasive, and pushy mental chatter is a voice that’s quiet, subtle, and powerful beyond measure.

That quiet voice is our authentic, “capital S” Self.

The loud, obnoxious voice is our Ego.

The Ego is hyper-comparative, is easily manipulated by outside influences, and desperately seeks control over the mind.

The Self is comparison-resistant, requires a deep impression for change from an outside source, and (fundamentally speaking) is the mind underneath all of the noise from the Ego.

It is as though the Self is the news of the world and the Ego is the news network that reports primarily for ratings.

Let the Ego take control and you get never ending BREAKING NEWS cycles, short-lived (and quickly irrelevant) urgent stories, and “if it bleeds it leads.”

Let the Self guide you and you get deeply insightful stories, long-lived “evergreen” type content, and “the truth will set you free.”

The interplay between these two forces is ever-present and plays a significant role in how we experience daily life.

The Ego, when left unattended, will operate exclusively for ratings. And all ratings without a depth of content makes for a very superficial, flaky news network.

The Self, without the presence of an Ego, will operate exclusively for depth and truth. Which has its own drawbacks. Because all depth and no ratings (appeal to an audience) makes for a very small time news network.

The ideal is a type of harmonious relationship between the two.

We start by building a solid foundation of truth, identity, and understanding of the Self and then use the Ego (without letting it use us) to serve those truths in powerful, appealing ways.

Forcing Original

Don’t “try” to be original.

You already are original.

Just surrender to your originality.

And stop trying to force what’s already there.

Act It

We are not who we want to be.

We are not who we think we are.

We are what we DO.

If we don’t choose our actions carefully, we’ll end up carelessly becoming a person we didn’t intend to become.

And what a tragedy that would be.

Once we decide who we want to be, we must act it.

You Don’t Win By Joining The Opposing Team

The best way to beat a liar is to not be like one.

The best way to beat a cheater is to not be like one.

The best way to beat a bully is to not be like one.

For as soon as you act like one, you’ve become one.

And to have become one is to have joined forces with the opposing team.

The Byproduct Of Choice

If you want to be beautiful don’t make ugly choices.

If you want to be excellent don’t make average choices.

If you want to be a professional don’t make amateur choices.

Identify who you want to become and align your choices accordingly.

Worth noting: intent, goals, aspirations, dreams, desires—all have nothing to do with it.

We are a byproduct of our choices. Nothing more and nothing less.

Hiding Places vs. Finding Places

Netflix, Playstation, Night Clubs = Hiding Places

Journals, Retreats, Deep Conversations = Finding Places

If you really want to find yourself, stop spending all of your time in hiding places.

Living In Imaginary Prison

Living your truth will set you free.

Living a lie will confine you into a cell of your own making.

Freedom is saying what you think and how you feel, as who you are.

Captivity is saying what you think others want to hear, based on how they feel, so that you can be who they think you are.

Don’t you see? The entire thinking process is under arrest by the anarchical judgements of others.

But, here, in this prison, there are no iron bars. There are no orange jumpsuits. There are no keys or guards.

This cell, the one you might find yourself in when you live a lie, is imaginary.

Whatever guards, keys, jumpsuits, and iron bars you feel incarcerated by, have been (and can only ever be) sentenced by you.

And so is the case for your sentence to freedom—it’s all decided within the confines of your mind.

So, how do you free yourself?

  1. Share your truth—with those closest to you, first. This is the key that will unlock your cell.
  2. Embody your truth—start to carry your truth with you into the outer areas of connection in your life. This is you walking out of jail and adjusting back to the “real world.”
  3. Live your truth—Continue to embody your truth until your truth (finally) becomes you.