What might feel like “stuck” might actually be cocooning.
Take this time of stillness as a disguised opportunity to accelerate your evolution.
Eventually, “stuck” will no longer be able to hold you in place.
Become “unstuck” by outgrowing your current situation.
If you’re having a hard time being yourself, rather than question yourself (what’s wrong with me?!), question everything else.
Being yourself shouldn’t require effort. It should never beget self-consciousness.
Being yourself should be effortless. It’s what comes from an absence of self-consciousness.
Being yourself is you in your raw, pure, and untainted state.
If what’s coming from you isn’t that—then it’s because of a factor that’s foreign to you.
That foreign element is making you (or has made you feel) reserved, fearful, and doubtful.
Question who or what that source might be (or has been):
Once you’ve identified what foreign elements are causing you internal conflict—remove as many of those influences from your life as you can.
Anything that moves you away from yourself should be removed (or at least mitigated) from your life without hesitation.
And anything that makes you feel more yourself should be more included in your life without hesitation.
Nothing in life goes well when you’re not able to be yourself.
Being yourself comes first.
Before you commit to a serious relationship, check how this person:
Of course everything is great when everything is great.
To really get to know the person you’re talking to, see how everything is when things get challenged.
Because life is challenging more often than it’s not and the last thing you want is to be stuck solving problems with somebody who acts the opposite of how they do when everything is great.
Before you complain about how somebody else isn’t loving you as much as they should…
Ask yourself:
Am I loving myself as much as I’m asking them to love me?
Less busy. More nothing. Less obligation. More curiosity. Less FOMO. More J(oy)OMO. Less holding on. More letting go. Less running around. More sitting still. Less reluctant “Yeses.” More respectful “Nos.” Less mindless reacting. More mindful muting. Less settling for less. More patience for better. Less free access to you. More value-driven exchanges with you. Less "I'll fix it for you." More "This is yours to fix." Less notifications. More Do Not Disturb mode. Less: "I always answer right away." More: "I'll reply when I'm ready." Less information consuming. More information digesting. Less “hard stops” with family. More “hard stops” with work. Less being tolerant of toxicity. More being adamant about access. Less getting pushed around. More of what pulls you around. Less: "I don't want anyone to get angry." More: "It's okay if others get angry." Less of what others added to your to-do list. More of what you added to your to-do list. Less rescuing people from their drama. More allowing people to experience natural consequences. Less: "It's my job to micromanage and helicopter." More: "It's not my job to think, feel, or live for others." Less following people to compare yourself against. More befriending people whom you can improve with. Reminder: the only people who will get upset with you adding these types of boundaries to your life are the ones who benefited from you not having them before. They are precisely the people whom you need to protect yourself against.
Eliminate all distractions and just sit.
No screens. No audio. No people.
Just sit and soak in the world.
You’d be amazed at how different 30 minutes feels.
Confidence is success remembered.
If you define success as getting a standing ovation after a TED Talk, then you’re going to have confidence issues.
If you define success as doing something that’s a little more than what you did before, then growing confidence will hardly be an issue.
With that in mind, here’s your formula: own your definition of success + make collecting “successes” a regular priority = watch your confidence grow.