Matt Hogan's Blog

Matt Who?

Published on September 21, 2022

I don’t know who needs to hear this but, who you surround yourself with is NOT limited to real life.

Once I catch wind of somebody who is doing something I’d like to do, talking about something I’d like to know more about, or is just damn interesting…

I surround my mind with their mind in every way I can.

I read their books.
I follow their social accounts.
I listen to their podcasts/ videos.

My reality is: some of the most influential people in my life don’t even know I exist.

P.s. I’ll be hosting a LIVE chat on Twitter today (9/22) at 11am EST. The topic is embracing adversity. I’d love to have you join if you’re free/ interested.

Painfully Slow

Published on September 20, 2022

Healing isn’t just about confronting what others have done to you…

It’s about confronting yourself—and the role YOU play in your own suffering.

Sometimes the one is what leads to the other.

But also, it’s the other that leads to the one.

As an example, when I was 10 people made fun of my weight.

For years after, I became my own worst critic.

My self-talk was hateful, demeaning, and hurtful.

But, then I started Martial Arts; and MoveMe Quotes; and daily writing—and a slew of other things that allowed me to confront that inner critic.

…And quiet him the hell up.

…Or maybe better said: gave him new, constructive, optimistic things to focus on and talk about.

Day-by-day, it didn’t feel like much was changing. Not when I would kick and punch for an hour; not when I collected quotes for an hour; and not when I started writing for an hour.

But, today? After 20+ years of kicking punching? 12+ years of collecting quotes? 2+ years of writing daily?

…Let’s just say that if Old Me and New Me sat down for a cup of joe… neither would recognize the other.

This is how healing works. Painfully slow and like nothing is changing day-by-day… until one day, you look back and it’s all different.

P.s. I sip on coffee while I write these. If you enjoy these posts, you can support my future work by supplying me with one of my next cups of joe.

Back To Zero

Published on September 19, 2022

Before reading this, do a body scan and progressively relax one muscle at a time starting with your forehead and ending with your toes—get your body back to zero percent unnecessary tension.

When done, how much tension would you say you released that you didn’t even realize you were holding?

Well, that tension is the equivalent of you pushing the gas in your parked car.

Multiply that over the course of an entire day—and you can imagine how much energy is being wasted.

The challenge is that tension is often the default, unconscious state—we don’t even realize we’re tensing up when we do!

Go ahead and do another body scan and see how much tension already came back.

…This is why we have to make relaxing a conscious effort.

Both for energy efficiency and bodily health. Tense muscles become brittle—and brittle is prone to injury and disease. Relaxed muscles are flexible—and flexible is healthy and resilient.

Doing a progressive relaxation body scan—regularly—is an excellent strategy.

How can we do this? Here are 3 ideas to get you started:

Set a timer: every time the timer goes off, do a body scan and get back to zero.
Use a trigger: every time your phone rings or buzzes, do a body scan and get back to zero.
Time-block: After each meal of the day, do a body scan and get back to zero.

The goal, like any other habitual practice, is to move relaxed from conscious to unconscious so it becomes more and more our default state.

P.s. In case you missed it, here’s the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week.

Deeper Love Comes From Deeper Self-Love

Published on September 18, 2022

If you want to improve the love you have with another…

Help the other improve the love they have with themself.

Let them have alone time, explore their interests, try new things, create and express freely, learn new skills, go on retreats, do poignant inner work…

You stopping them from doing such tasks is precisely what’s stopping them from being able to love you deeper.

Why? Because each of us can only ever love to the level of our own self-love.

A person’s inability to love another deeper has nothing to do with the other’s worthiness of receiving deeper love.

P.s. I asked “What are you avoiding?” Because it isn’t obvious to me what I might be avoiding. Worth thinking carefully about. Here are other people’s thoughts.

State Matters

Published on September 17, 2022

Exhausted is not the time for inner work.

Looking into your dark places when you’re mentally dark isn’t a bright idea.

Exhausted is the time for rest.

RESTED is the time for inner work.

Go into your dark places with your light shining bright.

Moving Towards Ideal

Published on September 16, 2022

The following three questions have been guiding my life for the past several years:

1. What does my ideal day look like?

2. What does my current day look like?

3. What can I do today to get my current day closer to my ideal?

Would recommend.

Selective Tension and Relaxation

Published on September 15, 2022

In Martial Arts, one of the goals is to learn how to maximize the creation of power while minimizing the expenditure of energy.

Essentially, it’s the practice of learning how to fully press the “gas pedal” while fully releasing the “brake pedal.”

Pressing the gas and brake pedal at the same time is wildly inefficient for driving. And so is it for moving the body. Yet, this is the default when it comes to moving the body with any degree of intensity.

Both the protagonist and antagonist muscle groups tense which, in effect, slows down the attempt to speed up all at once.

…And wastes a bunch of energy in the process.

The art then becomes learning how to selectively tense certain muscles while selective relaxing others in real time. And the challenge, of course, is that there isn’t only one gas and one brake pedal—there are hundreds.

And so it is for life.

The question to consider is this: in each task that you’re trying to complete, what resistance could you simultaneously reduce?

Sometimes we focus so much on the doing that we forget about the un-doing. Because while a 10% increase in speed for “doing” is good, a 20% decrease in resistance is better.

And this isn’t a question that’s asked and answered only once—it’s an ongoing awareness.

We’ll never get this perfect—for our bodies or for life. But, progress—any progress—makes the effort undoubtedly worth it.

P.s. This became the introduction for: 23 Greg McKeown Quotes from Essentialism and How To Live Better Via Less

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