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Category: Living Well

The Customer Isn’t Always Right

Published on January 13, 2025

Another observation from meeting my sister’s favorite people yesterday…

They all met each other through work—as waitresses, hostesses, and bartenders at a local fine dining restaurant—and all commented on how much they loved their job versus other places they’ve worked.

When I asked them why they loved it so much, they all replied that it was the owner that made the difference.

He trusted them to do their job(s) and wouldn’t micromanage, was always fair and kind, and would always tell them that they were his top priority—not the customers.

And by focusing on his key people, of course, his key people were able to focus on the customers. When you hire the right people, wanting to succeed is a given… focusing on nurturing the absolute best environment possible and giving them the tools they need to succeed should be that hirer’s top priority from that point forward.

…Undermining them, spreading toxicity, and cutting out their legs—even if it’s what the customer wants—is not what the business needs.

On Not Wanting To Force Kids Who Want To Quit

Published on January 7, 2025

Having worked with kids for 20+ years as a Martial Arts Instructor and mentor, I’ve had my fair share of “They want to quit and I don’t want to force them to go…” conversations.

And at first glance, not wanting to force someone to do something sounds legit…

…Because the last thing we want is resentment and misery for all involved.

However, misery is rarely how students feel at the end of any class they attend.

In fact, students most often leave class feeling… great. They’re smiling, joyful, and proud because of that sense of accomplishment that comes from completing something hard.

…See what appears to be “unmotivated” on the surface is really just comfort zone talk deep down.

…It’s a desire to avoid work and do more play. To stay cozied up versus getting down and dirty with some exercise. To kick off the shoes and video game versus kicking some heavy bag’s butt.

And there’s no better example of this than what I see in myself.

…Do you know how many times I want to go to the gym? Zero.

…Do you know how often I try to find excuses not to go? Every time.

But, I still go.

…Why? Because I know the benefits. And I know that I’ve never regretted a workout completed.

And this is the difference we need to teach our kids.

Resistance before is natural and will always be present. And if there’s resentment after, then yes, maybe a deeper conversation is needed. But, if a better state is the typical byproduct? Then you know it’s not resentment that the kids will be building when you push them to go… it’s discipline.

Don’t Call Them New Year Resolutions…

Published on January 6, 2025

Got new year resolutions?

We all know most of them don’t last.

Here’s a test…

Instead of calling it a new year resolution, try calling whatever it is you’re trying to do (or not do) a new life commitment.

…Feel the difference?

For example: If exercising every day is your new year resolution… but, exercising every day as a new life commitment sounds too intimidating or hard… what are you really doing then?

Because the point of a resolution is to make a firm (and lasting) decision to do or not do something. And if you’re not prepared to carry your decision forward for life… then how long are you prepared to carry it forward for?

…Answer this question and you’ll see why most new year resolutions fail. Because most people are only prepared to carry their resolution forward for a short period of time.

Want to change this about yourself?

Easy. Try making your resolution easier and run it through the same test again.

Repeat until whatever it is you’re resolving to do (or not do) feels firm enough to last you a really long time. And then watch how your life slowly, but surely improves.

P.s. My habit building guide (30 meditations; 30 challenges; 30 illustrations) is on sale now ➜

A Lesson From My Dad On His 70th Birthday

Published on January 3, 2025

Tonight, there was a celebration for my dad’s 70th birthday.

And right before it was time for cake, I gave a short speech highlighting seven things I learned from him.

The first six were concrete lessons—things he said or did that really helped me navigate life in a better way.

The last lesson, however, was one that only just started making sense to me tonight as I was preparing the speech.

And it’s the one line he has said time and again that he wants to have engraved on his tombstone: “I was only here for the cake.”

I’ve thought about this line on and off over the years and have pretty quickly submitted to mystery—leaving the expression as an open loop that I could curiously ponder from time to time.

And then when I imagined looking around at this celebration of my dad’s 70th revolution around the sun: eating good food, sipping champagne, and having cake… it started to make sense.

Because in many ways, cake was not something that was given to my dad throughout his life—cake was something he had to work really damn hard for.

And so as we were all sharing each other’s company and enjoying a wonderful night out, I concluded my speech by encouraging everyone to… eat the damn cake.

Because life happens fast—and if we can’t enjoy the cake every now and again, what are we working so damn hard for?

HBD, Dad. And cheers to many more lessons and beautiful years :)

P.s. You can read my complete speech here: 7 Lessons From My Dad, Read To Him At His 70th Birthday Party.

Live And In-Person For Life

Published on January 2, 2025

At some point on his journey, Matteo Milleri decided he wanted to start producing music. Which began as experimentation and eventually graduated to profession. Throughout that time, in addition to working incredibly hard to build a unique sound… he decided to start expanding and reimagining the visual landscape for his live performances as well—resulting in increasingly breath-taking, awe inspiring artistic expressions with each successive show. And so set the stage for Anyma.

Because just as he was out in front, pushing the boundaries of live audio-visual performances, the completion of the world’s largest and highest resolution interior and exterior LED screen was coming to a completion—The Sphere in Las Vegas. And breath-taking, awe inspiring audiovisual performances were high in demand. And who better to book than the person who was out in front… taking risks… taking initiative… elevating the bar of the industry as a whole and giving the art their all…? This is how The End of Genesys at The Sphere was born.

…And damn, what a breath-taking, awe-inspiring audiovisual masterpiece of a live and in-person experience it was. One that simply can’t be explained in words or paper-sized pictures or videos (here’s my puny attempt).

…As it should be, my fellow life traveler.

…As it should be.

Inner Work Prompt: What live and in-person experiences will you prioritize this year?

Treat Yo Self

Published on December 23, 2024

Nobody should be more in tune with your needs / desires than you.

And while a shiny new TV or a fresh pair of sneakers might be gifts at the top of your wishlist… there are needs / desires that supersede anything that gets wrapped in a box (or shoved in a bag with some tissue paper on top).

They are specific feelings / experiences that give us a sense of meaning / fulfillment and there’s six of them I want you to consider.

The first pair are certainty vs uncertainty. Too certain and our lives become mundane and vanilla. Too uncertain and we live overly anxious and chronically worried.

The next pair to consider are significance vs connection. When we feel too unique, special, important, different… we feel like outliers and struggle to connect deeply with others. When we feel too connected with others, we can lose our individuality and significance as an individual.

The final pair to consider are growth vs contribution. Focusing too much on growth is selfish—we ignore invaluable opportunities to use what we’ve developed to help others. On the other hand, focusing too much on contribution is counterproductive—we can only give back what we have or have built.

Ideally, we want to have a balance of all of the above in our lives.

The question is, which of the above needs the most work in yours?

Because once you’ve figured out that… the next step is to create the real wishlist. The one that focuses on the things you can do to improve that specific area… and includes the real gifts that’ll make the real dent in your life…

…And not just another person’s wallet.