Category: Feeling Fulfilled

Speaking of gratitude, my toilet is broken.

It won’t stop running and YouTube wasn’t helping, so I’m manually opening and closing the stop valve after each use—which is now leaking when open—and my plumber won’t be here until Friday.

It’s incredible how much we can get used to modern miracles and how removed they can get from our consciousness day-in and day-out.

Like, I can’t tell you the last time I stopped and felt gratitude for having a working toilet.

Imagine how different the day might be if we were able to notice and actually appreciate even 10% of the modern miracles we’ve unknowingly been taking for granted?

…Imagine how different the day might be if that percent jumped to 20? Or 30?

Imagine if you replaced 10-30% of your anxious or worrisome thoughts with gratitude and presence instead…

Might be worth trying to do throughout this very day.

I experienced a powerful moment of gratitude today after having spoken to two parents in the martial arts school I teach at.

One of them was telling me that after finally getting his medications correct, he was able to take a deep breath for the first time in about a month and a half.

…A month and a half.

And another one, who was sitting next to him, was telling me about her foot surgery and how her plans of halving the estimated recovery time, was actually looking more like it was going to be double what was estimated… and that, after getting her other foot done, she wouldn’t be able to walk normally again until around summer next year.

…Summer next year.

We’re talking about breathing and walking here.

Two things I know I take for granted more than I’d like to admit.

But, at least in that moment and maybe this one right now, I didn’t.

I walked a little more mindfully and took a deliberate and fulfilling couple of deep breaths.

…Something maybe you can try and do throughout your day today, too.

The goal is to build something that doesn’t need escaping from.

…Because escaping only lasts so long before your innate desire to build something arises again.

And not because we humans love to work—because we don’t.

But because we human crave fulfillment—and what’s worse than work is feeling like you’re living an empty type of existence.

So, back to work we go… because fulfillment is something building provides. Here’s how:

Building is growth—what else is building, but combining a bunch of lesser parts into some type of a greater whole?

Building is contribution—the value that’s added from this lesser parts combination becomes a creation that at the very least, serves you, which helps you to then serve others.

Building is connection/love—connecting parts, connecting minds, connecting resources, connecting ideas, connecting hearts…

Building is significance—whether it’s solely yours to build or you’re a part of a team that’s building somebody else’s dream… you get to leave your fingerprints on something that otherwise wouldn’t exist.

Building is certainty—it allows you to plan, dream, draw, shape, and mold something that starts out abstract and slowly becomes a tangible part of reality.

Building is uncertainty—and then, of course, things never go perfectly according to plan, so you get to adjust, pivot, problem-solve, fire fight, and learn by doing in an unpredictable way.

The real question you need to be grappling with isn’t—how can I escape from this work.

The real question you need to be grappling with is—how can I better incorporate each of these above elements into the work I’m choosing to do?

I stumbled across this image today:

And this is one of those quotes that has been stripped down too far and needs more context.

The big missing component in this quote is the duration of time spent feeling the heaven and the hell.

Because here’s the thing: A little time spent exercising might feel like “hell,” but can leave you in a heavenly state for a lot of time thereafter. A little time spent in gluttony might feel like “heaven,” but can leave you in a hell-like state for a lot of time thereafter.

But, that’s just the problem I have with this quote if you adopt this concept at all.

Because here’s my other thing: The road to heaven should feel heavenly and the road to hell will feel hell-like.

Who says exercise needs to feel hell-like? Who says enjoying a meal or dessert will lead you down a road towards hell?

Sure, Crossfit feels like hell to me—I’ll admit that. But basketball? Martial Arts? I very much look forward to these means of exercise. They’re heavenly for me.

And there should be no hell-like guilt felt for enjoying a nice meal or dessert. Everything in moderation.

…My final thing is this: Doing good feels good and doing bad feels bad. When we abide by the guidance of our inner compass and listen to our deepest desires for growth and contribution… that’s the heavenly road that leads towards heaven. And when we disregard this guidance… or maybe don’t take the time to understand it… or allow modern day devices to brainwash and distract us… that’s the hell-like road that leads toward hell.

One of my all star employees is getting back surgery this coming Monday.

He’s scheduled to be out for 3 months minimum.

Then, he needs to get both hips replaced.

…Scheduling him out for another 6 months after that.

It’s one of those bitter sweet moments where we’re sad he’s going to be out for so long because of how much of a light and anchor he is—but we’re also so glad he’s getting the work done he needs to get out of the chronic pain he has been in.

It’s one of those reminders to truly appreciate what you have before it’s gone.

…And it’s a reminder I’d like to pass off to you to reflect on today.

Who is the “light” of your day? What would life be like if they were gone?

Who is an “anchor”—a source of stability and consistency—in your life? How would your day feel without that anchor there?

What items, systems, modern inventions do you rely on heavily that make your days better/easier/more enjoyable? Imagine what your life would be like without them.

We visualize life without these people and things, not to be morbid or to make us sad, but so that we can revitalize the appreciation we have for them while they’re still here… So that we can more truly express these feelings towards them and fully enjoy all that they do for us without taking it/them for granted.

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P.s. ICYMI you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.

The snow is melting. Birds are chirping. The buds on trees are showing. People are coming out of hibernation. Our seasonal energy boost is returning and with it, our desire to freshen up and bring back to life our living environments is reawakening as well.

As you look around at the clutter, the extraneous purchase items, the piles of things created during the hibernation months… you might feel resistance and attachment.

Resistance because of how much… resistance because of where to start… resistance because of not knowing what to do with it all…

Attachment because of money spent… attachment because of time/energy/and effort invested… attachment because of not knowing when you might need/use it again…

To which I offer two simple formulas for you to consider that might help: (1) Trust behavior > Emotion and (2) Use + Emotion to combat – Emotion.

In regards to the first: Trust behavior over emotion… if a clothing item is at the bottom of your pile or in the back of your closet and you haven’t worn it in MONTHS… then trust that behavior more than any feelings you might have of it being “your favorite” or “still cute” etc. If you haven’t missed it in months… you probably won’t miss it.

In regards to the second: Use “positive” emotions to combat “negative” emotions… if you’re being held up by an irrational attachment to an item and you don’t want to just throw it away… try donating it to a homeless shelter or gifting it to a friend… the positive emotion of giving it to someone who could really use and benefit from it is like water to the fire of our attachment.

Happy spring cleaning :)