The full collection of explorations.
I might say… spontaneous joy being expressed by the body.
…Which isn’t the only way to express spontaneous joy.
But if you want to dance and you don’t… for whatever reason… does the spontaneous joy ever get expressed?
When I’m trying to think, it’s so much easier when I’m not being told what to think.
As I sit down to write each day, if I’m staring at a blank page… the thinking gets reflected back into my own mind and I’m able to settle and sort through my thoughts until I land on something I feel is worth sharing.
…If I’m staring at my email inbox, however, my thinking gets pulled into the subject lines, the senders, the questions that might arise over the different pieces of mail, and I’m no longer thinking internally—my eyes are gathering info that’s telling me what I should be thinking about.
The same is true if you’re trying to think, but you’re looking at a screen playing passive entertainment… or when you’re listening to lyrical music… or when you’re in a highly stimulating environment. It’s really hard to think when your senses are being bombarded with other thoughts and opinions and emotions.
This is why going for a walk in nature is so helpful for thinking. The trees don’t tell you what to think. Nor do the flowers or grasses or animals. The wind doesn’t have an opinion. And neither does the rain, snow, or sunshine.
And if that’s not an option available to you when you need to think the most, never underestimate the power of closing your eyes and sitting still. Bonus points for noise cancelling headphones. Double bonus points for noninvasive neurostimulating type music.
Try it. Do a little bit of it each day. But don’t take it for granted. It’s becoming harder than ever to find uninterrupted personal thinking space. It’s necessary. And it takes effort.
When there’s a lot going on and a lot to do, people can busy themselves in the distractions—just like they’re used to doing in their everyday private lives with screens, internet, and AI.
When there’s not a lot going on and nothing to do, most modern day people feel immediately a lack… like there’s something missing… and all of the usual fast-paced, quick dopamine-hitting energy pools and can feel pent up in a way that can sometimes feel like anxiety or irritability. Like: GIVE ME SOMETHING TO DO.
But what many of us don’t realize is that what we don’t give to distractions… doesn’t hurt our inner self… but is actually what we get to keep for ourselves. And that feeling of pent up energy? Is the perfect pool to channel and pull from for imagination, creativity, inner work, connection building, personal growth activities, and so on.
I’ve noticed this in myself as of late: the anxiety that builds the longer I avoid looking at my phone: particularly as I sit down to write each afternoon. “I’m missing something.” “I need to check on this or that.” “I wonder if he/she replied yet.” …And sometimes I cave. But sometimes I stay in that feeling of “anxiety” long enough to realize, it’s just a well of energy waiting to be tapped into and channelled into the very tasks that add depth and meaning to my life.
…And so it is for you.
Comparing apples to other apples is a fair comparison.
But people are not like apples. Comparing people to other people isn’t fair at all.
No two people are alike and as such, shouldn’t be looked at as apples to apples.
Yet, we people do this all of the time. We compare height, weight, ethnicity, face symmetry, hair color, eye color, bodily proportions, fitness level, education level, talent level, social media level, relationship status, highlight reels, bought brand names, number of friends, quality of life, and so… much… more…
The key, when it comes to inner work, is to release this compulsive tendency to compare yourself to others in an apples to apples kind of way. And to, instead, look at yourself as a one-of-one being who was made to be a completely unique expression of nature.
Peaches can be compared to peaches.
Marigolds can be compared to marigolds.
Oak trees can be compared to oak trees.
But you…?
…You can only be compared to who you were yesterday. And nobody on this earth else.
“I just wanted to say I love your energy.”
“The way you danced and smiled and were so present with everything you did… it was amazing.”
“Thank you for all of that and I hope you have a great day.”
…But I hesitated.
Still got more inner work to do.
Even when you follow the exact recipe… use the exact ingredients… in the exact proportions and prepared in the exact same ways… as is described exactly by your grandma herself?
How is it that it always tastes better when it’s done by her?
…I think it’s because love is an ingredient.
And I mean it in the same way that onions or garlic might be an ingredient.
Love transcends the metaphysical and becomes something tangible… something tasteful… something delicious…
It becomes a literal part of the recipe. And there’s no good substitution for it.
You either pour your heart into the recipe or you compromise and try “Attentiveness” or “Precise” or “Careful” or “Good enough” or “That’ll do…”
But you’ll always taste the compromise. Nothing tastes the same as pure, unconditional, un-rushed love.
And so it is for just about everything else you choose to do and make and create in this life.
My aunt has this young, 1-year-old black cat.
She’s curious and playful, but more often than not, uninvolved and off doing her own thing.
My aunt and cousins would call for her, play with toys to attract her, and try to entertain her frequently throughout the visit. And she would usually oblige for a few minutes… but then would carry on her way and unassumingly find something else to do.
I’m allergic to cats so I didn’t give forth that same kind of energy.
Well on the last night of my visit to my aunt’s house, I was sitting in meditation after everybody else had gone to sleep when suddenly, I hear the cat poking around. I opened my eyes and there she was, staring straight at me from the staircase.
It was strange because even when I was blowing her face trying to get a rise out of her, it felt like she was looking through me… or thinking carefully about something else while her eyes rested in my direction… never at me.
And yet… on this last night… as I sat there in a crossed-legged meditation position… she stared me down… unwaveringly… intensely… deliberately… and approached me slowly… slowly… until she was directly by my side… on the couch where I sat… sniffing… eyeing… evaluating…
…Until she eventually settled onto her legs, swallowing them up into her own meditation position of sorts, and closed her eyes.
It was strange that in that moment when I was still… un-seeking… and unassuming in a way myself… that it attracted the very cat that was being pursued… sought out… who seemed to have spent most of the weekend fleeing…