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Category: Archives

The full collection of explorations.

When Awful Things Happen

Published on July 21, 2023

Being a “good finder” can be tough when awful things happen.

It’s not always appropriate to look for the good in the bad (e.g. like when a heinous crime is committed) but when it is, one thought that can help is the gift of perspective that comes with the awful.

When we experience real hardship, suddenly all of the other “hardships” we experienced in life shrink a little and fade into the background in comparison.

Because in comparison is how we measure “hardship.” And not “in comparison” to other people’s lived experiences—only ever in comparison to our own.

Hardship only becomes real through direct experience. Without direct experience, it’s highly unlikely to affect our perspective (e.g. To see starvation and disease on TV is one thing; to live amongst starvation and disease is another).

When I think about the strongest people I know in life, the people who always come to mind are the ones who have been through the most—hardship, awful things, direct experience with the “bad.” They have a perspective that allows them to stay calm, cool, and collected over awfully heavy stuff while the inexperienced are flustering, raging, and cursing over #firstworldproblems.

This isn’t to judge or make you self-conscious of how you respond to awful things happening—or to say you should act a certain kind of way when they do. It’s merely to remind you that, if no other good can come from an awful thing happening, take with you the direct lived experience that allows you to deepen your life’s perspective.

…One that might even give others a measure of support and strength when they go through awful times of their own.

Answers In Progress

Published on July 20, 2023

I’ll sometimes stumble upon something I’ve written in the past and feel… surprised.

Sometimes at the thought (because I have since forgotten about that thought), sometimes at the way it was presented (either in a “well done” or “ew, omg” fashion), sometimes at the analogy choice/ word choice/ or storyline.

Regardless of why my past writing surprised me… it’s always a great reminder that past thoughts, ideas, efforts… fade. And new thoughts, ideas, and efforts emerge… and that we are always in a constant flux and everything (inside and out) is always changing.

Just because we wrote about something in the past or answered a question in our lives at one point before—doesn’t mean it’s answered permanently. In fact, assuming so could lead us in the wrong direction and regrettably down the wrong life path.

Looking back on your old work and at some of your past efforts might surprise you, too—and serve as a wonderful reminder that, when it comes to inner work, there are no answered questions per se, only answers in progress.

P.s. Not so sure about your direction in life? Fear you’re heading in a direction that might end with regret? My guide can help prevent that.

Sub 9

Published on July 19, 2023

Today, a friend and I ran 4 miles.

At the end, she reported that we averaged 8:50ish per mile and said, “Anything sub 9 is good.”

I didn’t say it then, but after thinking about it, I’d like to say next time, “Anything done is good.”

Put too much pressure on “sub 9” and you might skip runs altogether when sore or exhausted.

Better to let done be the primary metric you track and allow room for grace when it’s needed.

Because often… grace is needed. And those who can give it are the ones who truly stay on track.

P.s. If staying consistent with positive habits is hard for you (like exercising regularly), stay tuned. My NEW guide is in its final stages of completion…!

Aligned Problems

Published on July 18, 2023

This is your reoccurring reminder that there is no escaping problems in life.

Problems only get to be exchanged and/or upgraded.

So, the next time you find yourself complaining about a problem, ask yourself:

  • “What kinds of problems would I rather be solving?”
  • “What kinds of problems make me feel equal parts challenged and excited at the prospect of solving them?”
  • “How can I reverse engineer my way towards those problems and start exchanging some of my current ones for those ones?”

Those who live more fulfilled and enjoyable lives don’t live that way because of fewer problems per se—they live that way because of more aligned problems.

P.s. You might also like this 2-minute piece I published: The Problem With The Problem-Free Life

Thinking and Being

Published on July 17, 2023

There’s a time and a place for thinking. And there’s a time and a place for being. All being and no thinking leads to rash decision making. And all thinking and no being leads to a sheltered, inexperienced life.

Times when we’re experiencing life are times when we should drop thinking altogether. Like when we’re: walking, running, swimming, playing, hiking, meditating, listening, dancing, drawing, painting, etc.

And times when we’re reflecting on life and planning ahead for the future are times when we should turn the thinking up. Like when we’re: reading, writing, conversing, planning, researching, developing, building, brainstorming, imagining, visualizing, etc.

It’s when we get either of the two confused that we stumble in life.

It’s when we start thinking about playing or meditating or dancing that it suddenly becomes awkward and unnatural. And it’s when we spend all of our time being and none of our time writing or planning or imagining that suddenly our mistakes repeat and our life trajectory worsens.

Like most things in life, it’s a balancing act. One that I don’t think we’ll ever get perfectly correct, but one that we can and should be more conscious of and aim more deliberately for.

P.s. This post was inspired by (and became the afterword for) The Story About The Centipede and The Frog.

Alone… Together

Published on July 16, 2023

I meditated with a group for the first time today.

We met at a local park, sat in the grass, did 15 minutes of quiet sitting, 15 minutes of quiet walking or continued sitting (most kept sitting), and finished with another 15 minutes of quiet sitting.

Then, after everybody came out of their practice, the group spent 15 minutes discussing a topic.

Before we began, I asked one gentlemen what brought him to the group and he said he had a hard time meditating alone.

Which struck me because what is a meditation group, but a group of people who are practicing being alone… together?

There’s that element of connection during the discussion portion, but for 45 minutes, it’s just you. And if being with you is hard for you, for any duration of time, it’s as good an indicator as any that inner work is needed.

I don’t say this from a place of judgment, but from a place of compassion.

Because of all the company you keep in your life, there should be no better company than the company you keep with yourself. And the more you improve the company you keep with yourself, ironically, the better the rest of the company you keep will become, too.

Some questions to reflect on: (1) Have you ever considered practicing being alone? (2) Have you ever considered practicing being alone, in a group? (3) What, if anything, is coming up that’s preventing you from starting a practice like this?

P.s. In case you missed it, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.

Overstimulating Pixels vs Uncomfortable Quietness

Published on July 15, 2023

Overstimulating pixels vs uncomfortable quietness is THE modern day dilemma.

So many of the negative symptoms people experience in our modern world have to do with this boiled down and plainly stated challenge.

And as is true with any negatively experienced symptoms or illnesses in life, we can’t work to fight what we can’t name or don’t understand. It’s only after we understand what it is we’re up against, that we can start to work strategically to fight back.

With the awareness of the challenge laid out in front of us, hopefully more people can move into that uncomfortable quietness and get, what I consider to be, a taste of the antidote to the overstimulating pixels.

…And see how, with regular doses, their lives may start feeling less agitated, insufficient, anxiety-inducing, depressing, lonely, nerve-wracking, etc.

So many of our modern day problems can be solved with this, almost too easy, ancient and yet timeless solution—quietness.

And as much as you might want to consume more and more pixilated videos and articles explaining to you how to reduce anxiety, stop overthinking, improve self-image, etc… consider the idea that it’s the pixels themselves that are at the root of the cause of the negative symptoms.

My prescription to you is this: practice making uncomfortable quietness, comfortable again—and watch as your life slowly starts to improve and feel better.

P.s. Thank you to Samantha who inspired this post. Your email reply was refreshing to read.