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Category: Transforming Pain

All It Takes Is An Apple Eaten Wrong

Published on May 6, 2025

All it takes is an apple eaten a little too quickly…

A little too mindlessly…

For it to become lodged in your throat…

With not enough room to pass liquid, but just enough room to pass a pinch of air…

…For you to remember how fragile life is.

It took 15 minutes of coughing, spitting, and throat contorting to finally pass that apple clog.

And in each passing moment of pain and fear, I became increasingly aware of the tightrope of life I was walking.

…The same one that I’m always walking, but somehow perceive more like a curb… or sidewalk… or highway even—the longer I’m removed from run-ins with death.

But, don’t get it twisted…

The path we walk is not any wider than the width of a rope.

And each step needs to be taken deliberately and mindfully…

Because if it’s not…

All it takes is one misstep or slip up—an apple eaten wrong—for it to all go away.

Inner Ponds Need Outlets

Published on April 25, 2025

I uploaded a quote today to MoveMe Quotes that read, “Art is a safe place to explore and express all emotions. No feeling is taboo. It’s about being sensitive to what your body is telling you, then using your art to set the emotion free.”

Without some form of an outlet… our emotions continue to pour into a type of static, stale, toxicity-prone pond within.

Art is an incredibly powerful means of creating an outlet for that pond.

And slowly, slowly… as you explore and express your art… your emotions converge into more of a river and flow through your body and out into the medium of that chosen art.

Without this type of outlet, don’t you see how the emotions can swell within? Don’t you see how all of the grief, anger, frustration, loneliness, and sadness can intermix into a type of toxic stew… contaminating the whole vessel carrying it? Don’t you see how most passive entertainment and social media and news outlets only exacerbate that toxic stew…?

…Don’t you see how important it is to have an outlet?

…Don’t you see that’s what this daily blog is for me?

…Don’t you see that it’s about time you create an outlet for the inner pond within you?

Human Touch

Published on April 21, 2025

This coffee shop I’m sitting in—

…the one with the crooked neon signs, big bold sharpie-drawn posters taped to the front windows, and thrifted furniture where no two pieces are the same

…the one with Santa on the cabinet in April, that displays Amy’s soup cans for sale right across from the Pope Francis action figures, and has the dying indoor plant next to the thriving bamboo growing out of an elephant’s back

…the one with the over-baked cookies, where the smell of crushed coffee beans lingers next to the hipster Spotify tunes, and instagram QR codes are posted throughout so even when we leave their art isn’t something we just forget

—the one that reeks of human touch…

Is something I’m not so sure us humans will ever be able to program into 1s and 0s and artificially recreate.

In a world that threatens to replace humans like cogs in a machine… be so much more than 1s and 0s.

Don’t Waste Time Alone

Published on April 9, 2025

Don’t waste time alone.

Society might have you brainwashed into believing being alone is a bad thing. Like, “Why are you still single?” or “Did you go there alone?” or, you know, the looks and tones.

And social media might have you trained into believing that turning it on and scrolling is socially connecting you—so as to distract you from the alone.

And the feelings of boredom might make you cringe and restlessly pace in circles over doing anything still and meditative when your calendar appears blank and your battery charge goes.

But… being alone is not a bad thing.

Don’t… waste time alone.

Time alone is time that can be spent turned inward… exploring the inner landscapes… uncovering the hidden gems of insight buried within the depths of your mind.

Time alone is time that can be spent healing… unpacking and reflecting on pains of the past… bringing clarity to thoughts tangled by writing them down… absorbing information from the most brilliant minds to have ever arranged words into practical, life-changing ideas.

Time alone is time that can be spent present… slowing down from the rush of the modern day wave… soaking in the information that’s touching your senses in the here and now—that may never again touch again in the same way… being grateful for the experience of life—despite all of its ups and downs…

Being alone is not a bad thing.

In fact, it may very well be precisely the thing that more of us need.

Don’t… waste time alone.

P.s. If you enjoy these 1-min messages, would you reply with a 1-line testimony that I can add to this landing page? :)

Good Karma Is Always A Good Idea

Published on April 2, 2025

Spend a little time each day helping people while you still can…

It’s one of the best ways to ensure that when you need help, you’ll have people who not only can…

But want to and will.

Prioritizing Here Over There

Published on March 31, 2025
  • I have a new employee starting today.
  • It’s one of my friend’s son’s birthday today.
  • My aunt is moving into her new “forever” home today.
  • My co-worker is having an intense back surgery procedure today.
  • And while I was driving home today, I saw that my neighbor’s house caught fire and burned down. Literally four houses away from where I live.

For each of the above situations, there are things I can do to help out. Things I can do to show thoughtfulness and care. Things I can do to make a real difference in their day… maybe even longer than that.

And my bet is, that’s probably true for you, too. Maybe not to the same extent that it happened for me on this particular day… but there none-the-less. Heck… maybe even more so?

My point is… maybe you’re focusing too much on the grandiose or getting too distracted on screen impact… and not enough on the folks in your own neighborhoods and in real life (IRL). The time, energy, and effort invested IRL can have an exponential effect compared to the same invested into screens.

A Lesson From Cheryl Strayed On Managing Grief

Published on March 26, 2025

After the death of her mom, Cheryl Strayed turned devastation and grief into self-sabotage.

She blew up her young marriage, estranged herself from her family, and started doing hard drugs—including heroin.

“I tried to wreck my life as a weird way to honor the death of my mom…” she admitted as she reflected back on that delicate time many years later at a live talk here in Buffalo, NY.

…Which I think is a very natural, knee-jerk kind of reaction to such overwhelming pain due to loss or grief in general.

We want to show how much we cared for a person—how much we loved them—by showing how deep our pain goes. And so we make this perverse decision to self-sabotage and wreck ourselves and our lives to display this deep love and care.

…But—and this is such an important but to consider when dealing with a blinding and unrelenting force like grief…

“…What we really need to do,” Cheryl said from the clarity of her further healed and more deeply considerate mind, “…is thrive.”

This is how we really honor the ones we love.

Not by causing further depths of pain and hate.

…But by embodying the depth of that love and becoming the living legacy of the absolute best version of that person. Spreading not more pain into the world—but, joy. Spreading not more hate into the lives of those around us—but, love.

…Leaving us not nearly dead and alone with a needle sticking out of our arm—but alive and thriving and accomplishing unimaginatively impressive feats that’ll inspire not only those around us today… but those in many generations to come.