Skip to content

Category: Thinking Clearly

Want Something Out Of Your Mind?

Published on September 24, 2021

“Out of sight, out of mind” can be an excellent model for improving the overall quality of your life.

Put what you want IN your mind, IN sight.

Take what you DON’T want in your mind, OUT of sight.

As obvious as this might sound, I can’t tell you how many people keep what they don’t want in their mind in sight and keep what they do want in their mind out of sight.

Look closely at what you allow to stay in (and out of) sight for the entire duration of a typical day and adjust accordingly.

And not just physically—digitally, too.

Don’t underestimate this.

Ignoring Conflict Doesn’t Lead To Peace

Published on September 19, 2021

Here’s a thought: want to cultivate inner peace? Stop avoiding inner conflict.

What happens when a fight breaks out and nobody does anything about it? It continues.

And in many cases: it escalates.

It takes the brave bystander to step in before things start to settle; the courageous cop to heave themselves into the middle of a barrage of fists; the over-worked and under-rested parent to draw the line and invoke discipline before the family feuds finally dissipate.

It’s the willingness to confront conflict that leads to peace.

Not the willingness to peacefully ignore conflict in hope that it resolves itself.

Living In Imaginary Prison

Published on September 15, 2021

Living your truth will set you free.

Living a lie will confine you into a cell of your own making.

Freedom is saying what you think and how you feel, as who you are.

Captivity is saying what you think others want to hear, based on how they feel, so that you can be who they think you are.

Don’t you see? The entire thinking process is under arrest by the anarchical judgements of others.

But, here, in this prison, there are no iron bars. There are no orange jumpsuits. There are no keys or guards.

This cell, the one you might find yourself in when you live a lie, is imaginary.

Whatever guards, keys, jumpsuits, and iron bars you feel incarcerated by, have been (and can only ever be) sentenced by you.

And so is the case for your sentence to freedom—it’s all decided within the confines of your mind.

So, how do you free yourself?

  1. Share your truth—with those closest to you, first. This is the key that will unlock your cell.
  2. Embody your truth—start to carry your truth with you into the outer areas of connection in your life. This is you walking out of jail and adjusting back to the “real world.”
  3. Live your truth—Continue to embody your truth until your truth (finally) becomes you.

Anti-Perfectionism

Published on September 10, 2021

Perfectionism doesn’t beget perfection.

If anything, perfectionism begets hesitation and disappointment—over and over again.

For every time you look close—another flaw, wrinkle, fault presses itself forward and prevents you from acting or feeling in the desired way.

And as long as perfection is the standard, disappointment will continue to be the byproduct.

Why? Because perfection is the antithesis of being human—we are anti-perfect creatures.

We’re filled with flaws, wrinkles, and faults that are constantly pressing themselves forward into the forefront of our minds.

They demand our attention and are constantly reminding us of the paradox of our situation: imperfect creatures fighting to become perfect.

And so we hesitate. We feel disappointment. We fill with anguish.

Until, of course, we don’t.

Until we align with our nature rather than fight it. Until we fill our minds with acceptance rather than inadequacy. Until we stop seeking perfection and start embracing what’s imperfect.

Until we finally choose to become anti-perfectionists.

Facilitating The Successful And The Fools

Published on September 5, 2021

Let’s not forget: fools can say and do things that provide value—and highly successful people can say and do things that are dumb .

Don’t let your overall perception of a person define how you think about everything they ever say and do.

Accept and challenge each statement and action in its own right—free of your predispositions and past judgements.

Be the person who can admit when they are acting out of character—both in good ways and in bad.

It’s incredibly easy to do the opposite. But, being the person who can admit when a person is acting out of character, may very well be the facilitation they need.

What Causes Your Effects?

Published on September 3, 2021

You cannot have an effect without a cause.

Your actions are an effect.

If you don’t like your actions: look closer at what’s causing them.

The real cause(s) might not be as obvious as you initially think.

You might be short towards a coffee shop employee because you didn’t get a good night sleep.

Or you might be short towards a coffee shop employee because of a grudge you’ve been building towards a loved one—which inadvertently has been causing you to lose sleep and your temper.

Being proactive in understanding your causes is the secret to having more clearly understood effects.

Like You Mean It

Published on September 3, 2021

Back up. Chin up. Eyes straight ahead.

When you speak? Speak loud and clear.

Presentation is important. Delivery is important.

When you do these things, the exact same words said in the exact same context hit completely differently.

And your words, the ones you so carefully chose, will stand to reach their full potential.

What a shame to see them end up otherwise.