Category: Thinking Clearly

The A/B Game

Published on November 5, 2022

There’s a game I play in martial arts classes called the A/B Game.

It’s simple.

When I say “A,” students fire off a given technique as fast as they can.

When I say “B,” they stay frozen.

My goal is to mess them up by getting them to fire off the technique on “B.”

Their goal is to have such great focus that they don’t even so much as flinch on “B.”

In the early stages of the game, getting flinchers is relatively easy—some because they’re just unfocused; some because they’re too focused on being fast; and some because they need to mess up before they actually understand the game.

As the game progresses, there’s usually a handful who are hard to mess up—so, I’ll pull out one of my tricks from my bag.

Right before I call “A” or “B,” I’ll nonchalantly say… “Okay, now I want you to beat the person next to you. Don’t let them beat you…okay? Ready…”

And then quickly yell “B!” …And get a huge chunk of students to flinch. It works almost every time.

…Why?

Because instead of focusing on themselves, I got them to focus on the others. Instead of focusing on doing their best, they were distracted on being THE best and lost connection with their focused mind.

See… When we focus on beating everybody else; on racing the person next to us; on trying to be the best—we lose sight of the most important thing… focus on ourself.

P.s. I also published 46 Impactful Bruce Lee Quotes from Striking Thoughts today.

Prove Yourself

Published on November 4, 2022

Some people prove themselves in school.
Some people prove themselves in conflict.
Some people prove themselves in business.

…And some people realize that they have nothing to prove to anyone except themselves.

….And so they build. Not to have something bigger than anybody else—but, to have something built that serves a purpose; that fulfills a vision; that realizes a dream.

A purpose, vision, and/or dream that comes from within, that’s built with the tools within, that helps nourish feelings that can only ever be influenced from within.

Because those who try to get feelings from letter grades, fist fights, or number games end up taking a long detour that winds up, down, and over an incredible terrain—only to leave them back where they started… looking at the only person who had the ability to give them the feelings they so desperately sought out the whole time…

…The same one who was there with them right from the beginning.

…Themself.

Authentic Media

Published on October 31, 2022

Sharing publicly a highlight-reel version of our lives feels like it’s in our best interest because it:

Makes us “more attractive”
May lead to more opportunities
Can capture attention that can be leveraged

What’s really in our best interest is sharing an authentic version of our lives because it:

Attracts an authentic tribe
Leads to more aligned opportunities
Captures attention from the right people

Worth mentioning that these two aren’t mutually exclusive, though.

A public presence can certainly feature both—we can have an authentic highlight-reel.

But, more often than not, the former is focused on at the expense of the latter. And our mental health pays a toll in the long-run.

P.s. I asked: “What cleanses your soul?” I hope the answers inspire you to do more of what cleanses yours.

Information Swimming

Published on October 28, 2022

Information is an ocean—and most of us are drowning.

Those who get ahead, are the ones who learn to swim.

They take the ocean seriously and never mindlessly wander into its depths.

They learn how to float; how to tread; how to stroke; how to dive; how to navigate.

Similarly, proficient swimmers in today’s information-based world learn how to:

Focus. So they don’t recklessly flap, twist, turn, and click with every distraction (i.e. Turning on an ad-blocker or putting notifications on silent).
Refine. So that each stroke/ click gets them better at future swimming (clicking)—not worse (i.e. Utilizing the Unfollow/ Mute/ Block buttons and more mindfully choosing who to follow and where to click).
Reflect. Because sometimes the ocean gets the best of even great swimmers. And maybe they take in a bunch of salt water through the nose or get caught under a big crashing wave (sucked into a YouTube rabbit hole). It’s in those moments that you have to figure out how you might handle the same situation from repeating in the future. Those who don’t reflect—don’t improve.

Being in an ocean when you don’t know how to swim is terrifying because the water is in control (and can lead to drowning).

Being in an ocean when you do know how to swim is incredibly refreshing and rewarding—because you are in control (and you get to swim in the ocean).

…And what a beautiful opportunity it truly is to swim confidently in the ocean.

P.s. Here’s an article I wrote on better managing your information diet: How to Upgrade the Quality of Your Life in 1 Hour.

Until Perfect

Published on October 21, 2022

Many people see “good enough” as the enemy.

But, “good enough” is precisely what gets you to publish; to produce; to share.

Without “good enough”—when does anything ever reach completion?

The real enemy is “until perfect.”

Perfect is a forever fleeting finish line that moves further from us the more we learn and grow. Which, hopefully, will be for the rest of our lives.

This, in a nutshell, is the perfectionist’s paradox.

The place where the desire to do it better is constantly met with an increase in competence which forever perpetuates the things we’re working on into the future (because we can do what we’ve done better now that we’re better and so we do it again until we’ve grown and gotten better all over again). Did you catch that?

This is precisely why so many beautiful creations haven’t been published; produced; or shared.

…Don’t let this be you.

Eventually, you must accept that what you’ve done is “good enough.”

And what’s more is this… whoever said typos/ mistakes/ issues with your creations are inherently a bad thing?

What if, as Catherine Toops points out on Twitter, “…your typos are just a trail of inspiration for writers who want to believe they can do what you’ve done?”

Maybe sharing imperfect work is inherently better than “perfect” work?

I know I light up when I catch a professional writer’s typo(s).

Not because it’s a mistake… but, because it’s a sign that they’re human.

And maybe I can actually do what they’ve done, too.

The Key To A New Reality

Published on October 17, 2022

The key that unlocks a more beautiful outer reality is cut within… Never without.

You can keep trying to jab the current key (that is your perception) into reality and try to force it to turn—but, I’m afraid it’ll be about as useful as shoving your car key into your house’s front door lock.

The only key that’ll open the front door to your house is the key that was specifically cut to open it.

And until you get a new key cut, one that can open a different door to a different house (reality), it’s the only reality you can count on seeing.

How do you cut a new key, you ask?

Well, by doing inner work, of course.

The kind of work that cuts through the noise, distractions, and busywork—and with a fine blade of attention, challenges the rigidity of our current conditioning, beliefs, and thought patterns against those of others (found in books/ podcasts/ videos)… until a new edge on the key is created.

…And a new key is formed.

P.s. In case you missed it, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.

How Would You Coach You?

Published on October 15, 2022

A question I’ve been chewing on lately:

“If I was coaching me what uncomfortable questions would I ask myself and (the important part) push myself to answer?”

Because ultimately, this is what many of the best coaches do. Why? Because we’re much more likely to believe the things we tell ourselves over the things others tell us.

And a good coach knows, if they can get you to say to yourself what they were just going to straight up tell you… their message will be far more likely to stick.

And how does one do this? By asking the right questions.

So, why not sit yourself down, get yourself a cup of coffee, put on some noise-cancelling headphones, and give it a shot yourself?

Even 15 minutes can completely alter the direction of your life.

Or… you could pay someone thousands and they could do it for you? Or… you could just not do it at all?

As always… growth in life will always be a personal choice.

The point I want to make is: the choice to grow is closer (and less expensive) than you might think.

P.s. Got any good questions that have led to noteworthy personal growth? Send a reply. I’d love to hear them.