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Category: Thinking Clearly

Rare Character Titles

Published on January 30, 2023
  • Wise
  • Loyal
  • Humble
  • Generous
  • Admirable
  • Respectful
  • Dependable

…Aren’t character traits you can give yourself.

They can only ever be gifted to you by others—regardless of how much you believe it, say it, or fight for it (them).

Some things can only ever be proven through action.

Side note: there is an argument to be made for the situation when you’re surrounded by people who simply don’t give gifts of any kind. People who are so consumed in their own worlds that they don’t have the capacity or capability to gift these rare character titles to others. And if that’s the case, remember, getting the rare character titles gifted to you isn’t the point. The point is to embody the rare character traits because of the innate goodness that doing so provides in value for you and your life. Getting the title should never be the expectation; only the rare, unexpected (and greatly appreciated) gift.

…If you want to get the rare character title of appreciative, that is.

P.s. January 26th was the anniversary of Kobe Bryant’s tragic death. I wrote a piece honoring his legacy here.

Mental Sweat Required

Published on January 29, 2023

You become what you study; study what you want to become.

You become who you speak with; speak with who you want to become.

You become what you think carefully about; think carefully about what (and who) you want to become.*

*Thinking carefully implies deliberate conscious effort, not what happens unconsciously throughout the day. We’re talking about the kind of thinking that happens when you ask and mentally sweat over tough questions. Questions that challenge your limiting beliefs, comfort zones, life path, ingrained habits, close relationships, identity, vision, beliefs, and so on. Yes, this is the kind of thinking that shapes who you will ultimately become.

P.s. In case you missed it, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.

Tangible Confidence

Published on January 25, 2023

If you lack confidence, it’s not something you can just pull from thin air or positive thinking.

Confidence is something that is built tangibly—in reality.

It’s something that requires a stacking of little successes that slowly… slowly… build a track record we can start to believe in.

If we have never done a thing successfully—ever—even in a small way, of course we’ll have a crippling lack of confidence.

Confidence comes when we get out of our head and get focused on doing more in the world—one small, aligned success at a time.

P.s. I asked: What gets you to do the thing you know you need to do when you REALLY DON’T want to do it? I hope the replies help. :)

Pay Yourself First

Published on January 22, 2023

You will never be able to give others enough of your time/energy/attention—they’ll always gladly demand and accept more.

This is where prioritizing others over yourself crashes and burns.

There will never be “left over” time/energy/attention. “Extra” is an illusion. The demands of others is a bottomless pit.

Pay yourself in time/energy/attention FIRST. Then, when full, give extra or what you have left over to others.

P.s. In case you missed it, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.

Easing Into The Unfamiliar

Published on January 8, 2023

Regardless of how awful your current reality is—you’re likely going to stay in it until you can find a way to make a different reality familiar.

Because even though our current reality might be awful, it’s what we know… which, in a weird way, makes it comfortable.

The scary thing about the unfamiliar is that it could lead to a far worse reality… greater discomfort… and even more awful. You have no idea, right?

But, it could also lead to the opposite.

What helps in transitioning from awful to better is a patient focus on simply showing up, gently trying new situations out, and giving these unknowns a generous chance.

The more we can familiarize ourself with a new, potentially better reality—the less likely we will be to settle into a reality that’s life suffocating and far below what we know we deserve.

P.s. In case you missed it, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.

The Opportunity In Loss

Published on January 7, 2023

Everything we lose in life leaves with it a space.

  • Lost love
  • Lost work
  • Lost friends

…For a while, it’ll probably be an uncomfortable space.

But slowly… eventually… you’ll start to see that space as something of a blank slate.

And slowly… eventually… you’ll realize what you have inside is everything you need to paint a new (even better) masterpiece.

Stretching The Mind

Published on January 5, 2023

We don’t move toward flexibility in life—we move toward tension, brittleness, and restriction.

The more time we invest in stretching and mobility work, the more we move in the opposite direction.

The same is true with our inner states.

The default is to move toward tension, stress, and chaos.

The more time we invest in meditating, writing, and reflecting—the more we move in the opposite direction.

The other reason I love this analogy is because the same steady discomfort you feel while doing deep stretching is the same kind of steady tension you might feel in your mind while doing deep inner work.

The goal shouldn’t be to force the stretch to the point of agony or injury. The goal should be to find a place of tension that’s uncomfortable, but bearable—one that is sustainable.

Because the real benefit of stretching and inner work comes not from quick, sporadic sessions… but from steady, extended ones.

You won’t find inner peace after a few inner works sessions just like you won’t achieve a full split after a few stretching sessions.

But, with patience and a firm resolve… you just might move in that direction. And any inner peace gained, just as any flexibility gained, is always a win. This is the path.