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Category: Living Well

Who’s Going To Give Others What You Want Them To Have?

Published on May 5, 2026

It’s very hard to give what you don’t have.

This is obvious from a material standpoint, but maybe less so from an emotional one.

If I want my children to have money, but I don’t have any money to give them, the money I want them to get won’t be coming from me—and I have to figure out another way.

The same is true for joy. If I want the people around me to feel joyous, but I don’t have any joy to give them… the joy I want them to exhibit isn’t going to come from me… and I have to figure out another way.

And maybe “another way” is to ask someone else to give it to them… or teach them how to make/create it themself… or hire someone else to teach them how…

…Or, of course, you could figure out how to get joy / money yourself so that you can give it to them after all.

And instead of trying to use (whether consciously or unconsciously) broke to create money or misery to create joy or hate to create love… you can turn the focus of your attention around and back to the source. Back to the place you can control. Back to you, your life, and your own inner workings so that what you most want for others can (finally) start coming from you.

The Slightly Longer Route

Published on May 4, 2026

It’s easier than ever to eat food the instant you’re hungry. With drive-thrus, microwaves, and processing—taking short cuts to calories has become the modern day norm. But, this only leads to problems later on (typically) because much of the above is crap. And when you eat crap that has little to no nutritional value, you’ll end up paying in health what you tried to save in dollars and minutes. And the cost of health is worth far more than whatever you think you saved in dollars and minutes.

But, you probably already knew this.

…As did I.

And yet, I still took short cuts for years without any immediate remorse. I would eat microwaved food daily. Default almost immediately to highly processed pretzels and dips whenever hungry. And stock up on frozen meals for my “heartier” options. And it was all just crap, crap, crap.

…Eventually, I started feeling bad enough to actually do something about it.

And so I started cutting things like donuts, pop/soda, and dairy. I started intermittent fasting. I started making fruit and protein packed smoothies…

The part I’m focused on now is cutting the microwave meals. Because even though I buy stuff that’s got vegetables and good protein counts in it, it’s still mostly crap. So I joined a food delivery service that gives me 10ish-minute meal recipes and all the fresh ingredients needed. All ready to go.

My point is this: short-cuts are the modern day norm; but not all short-cuts are created equal.

The ROI of the slightly longer routes can yield a disproportionately large return.

…If you’re not ready to take the long route… At least take the slightly longer one.

Balanced + Mindful > Hard + Miserable and/or Easy + Distracted

Published on May 3, 2026

During a martial arts class I took this morning, the master teaching commented on how important it is to do the hard things in training.

He said, firstly, it keeps you humble. People who skip the hard parts and build skills via short cuts or lazy tactics become arrogant. Their technique never fully tested and not completely earned… leaving them prone to thinking things (I.e. real life application of techniques) are easier than they actually are; than they’ve ever experienced them to be.

And secondly, he said easy doesn’t train the person in full… it maybe only hits one aspect of the mind, body, spirit connection. The example he gave was running on a treadmill while watching TV… it works the body but completely disengages the development of the mind… and the spirit can only be developed when both the mind and body are being challenged together.

The goal, however, isn’t to make exercise and/or training as difficult as possible. This wouldn’t be a good strategy either. It’s simply a reminder to find the medium between these two extremes. Don’t opt for easy+distracted and don’t push to the other extreme of hard+miserable… aim for balanced+mindful.

Focus on the strategy of fully utilizing your mind… to activate your body in an appropriately challenged way… so that the two of them ignite with energy and vibrate the spirit to life and development as well.

Look Good, Feel Good?

Published on April 30, 2026

I’ll never forget when somebody criticized a high school friend of mine on her desire to “look good” before playing in soccer games. The criticism being around the idea that she’s going to play a sport and get dirty and sweaty and messy anyway… so why do all of that extra “look good” work before the practices and games?

She replied simply, “When I look good, I feel good. And when I feel good, I play better.”

And it really does play out like that.

When we’re feeling our outfit… we’re also feeling more confident… and our actions reflect that versus what we might’ve done if we were feeling self-conscious and awkward. And better actions, of course, lead to better results and outcomes.

I recognize a similar correlation when it comes to martial arts. The students who take the time to get their uniform right and look sharp also tend to be the students with the sharper technique. And the ones who arrive disheveled, tend to have sloppier technique.

The reminder today is simple: invest a little more time, energy, and/or effort into feeling good. Whether that’s in your appearance, your fit, your workspace, your room, your wellness routine… it’s all correlated. And by investing into the one… you’ll likely be pleasantly surprised to find some positive returns in the other aspects of your life as well.

Cushy Couches and iPhone Games

Published on April 27, 2026

Another takeaway from the live Imani Perry talk I attended this past Thursday: she said, “Most modern day people have just enough means to entertain themselves away from truth.”

Truth, of course, being the reality of the world.

…And how it’s not cushy couches and meaningless iPhone games.

…But, how it’s war and crime and hate.

It’s not only that, of course—there is so much of the opposite in the world. But, it’s undeniably present in our shared reality.

And the point she was getting to shortly after she shared the above quote is that, if we’re not acting in a way that stands up to the war and crime and hate… then we’re a part of the problem. And if we “entertain ourselves” into ignorance… then we’re a part of the problem. If we stand up, speak out, and act in ways that lead to peace and justice and love… then we’re a part of the solution.

…And what we need now more than ever are people who are a part of the solution.

Two Life Goals I Hadn’t Heard Before

Published on April 26, 2026

I got to train with a Muy Thai Master this weekend.

And at the end of our three hour session, he started speaking about health and wellness and how he wants to live to be a centenarian.

…But not if that meant having a low quality of life where he’s bedridden, lonely, and miserable.

His two very distinct and unique goals he set for himself—that he has attached to this goal of becoming a centenarian are: (1) That he’s able to bend over and pick up his grandkids and (2) That he’s able to walk independently on uneven surfaces.

And so he’s reverse engineering his lifestyle to prepare him for those two goals as he gets older. Which includes a wide array of thoughtful and deliberate strategies that he’s integrated into his lifestyle as protocols that he follows religously.

…And I just couldn’t help but think how refreshing those goals were in a sea of wished for yachts and added zeros.

Don’t Hoard Your Fruit

Published on April 23, 2026

What are you working so hard for?

…Is it for your family? Is it for fancy cars and clothes? Is it for travel and entertainment?

Here’s the thing: once you answer this question honestly… it’s important to recognize the “ends” even while you’re in the midst of your “means.”

In other words, if you’re working so hard for your family, then recognize the moments you have with them—when you’re not working—for what they are: the fruits of your labor.

And the same is true when you’re traveling or relaxing or making an exciting purchase… recognize it as the fruit. Don’t let “labor” contaminate its taste. Savor the bites along the way.

And keep a healthy regiment of enjoying your fruit regularly.

Fruit goes bad when it’s left unattended for too long. And eating a mountain of fruit later in life isn’t nearly as good as enjoying your fruit each day along the way.