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Category: Living Well

Away From Obligation

One thing I’m quickly noticing in myself as I continue doing my nightly walks without Stella is an increased pace.

I’m walking much faster by myself than I did when she was with me.

I don’t know if it’s a subconscious attempt to complete the task—as though it’s obligatory—but I have to consciously remind myself to slow down… as she would do for me when she would stop to pee or smell pee or stalk a bunny or whatever.

I don’t want these walks to feel obligatory.

I don’t want anything I do to feel obligatory.

And the best antidote I’m finding to that obligatory instinct, counterintuitively, is to slow down the very thing I’m trying to expedite.

Not being in a rush to finish is an excellent sign that you’re enjoying the process—the moment (life)—for what it is.

That We Made It This Far…

  • That we won the one-in-a-trillion lottery and were born.
  • That we had the basics of survival covered until we were able to provide on our own.
  • That we had the chance to learn and grow.
  • That we were able to create art and consume art and share art.
  • That we were able to love and laugh and lose…

…Is the ultimate blessing.

And to live as though it isn’t (by taking it for granted or simply forgetting) is to set your story up for an abrupt and regretful conclusion.

Rent’s Due

Love; kindness; compassion; contribution; and a commitment to goodness and doing what’s right… this is the rent we pay in exchange for being able to live here on earth. It’s how we pay forward the gift we’ve been given of getting to live on a beautiful planet.

Hate; cruelty; heartlessness; greed; and a commitment to wrongdoing and evil… is to completely abuse this gift and is to trash the very house from which we were gifted to live in. It’s to shed yourself of responsibility, disregard anyone who is to come after, and to selfishly waste resources that could otherwise provide and help sustain continued life.

If there’s one thing you should aim to do throughout your life, it’s to leave this space—this beautiful planet—better than you found it. And we do this every time we pay our rent… which is done in every step we take, every decision we make, and every interaction we partake in… be it monthly, weekly, or daily… in how we chose love over hate, kindness over cruelty, compassion over heartlessness, contribution over greed, and goodness over evil.

Rent’s due.

…And for all of our sake—please don’t be late.


Inner Work Prompt: Are you leaving the world better than you found it? What’s one thing you know you need to do a better job of that you want to start improving?

Unearth All That You Can

Resist the temptation to believe you’ll be around for a while.

For buried beneath that idea are the invaluable treasures of your life that you’ll always have thought you’d have more time to excavate.

…You’ll never have enough time to excavate them all. Better not waste any time and unearth all that you can.

…While you’re still here and know that you still can.


P.s. In case you missed it, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.

Rheotaxis

Modern day culture is pushing all of us—especially those swallowed deep within its massive current—towards dopamine, dopamine, dopamine with increasing intensity with each passing day.

Soak up the diagram below which illustrates these modern day currents:

Image Credit: Ted Gioia | Full image resolution here.

The danger with surrendering to this current is that it pushes us further and further into a never ending cycle of short-term pleasure seeking where we do a dopamine releasing task, which causes the neurochemical dopamine to be released, which makes us feel good, which makes us want to repeat the stimulus, which makes us do the domaine releasing task again, and so forth until it’s repeated so much it turns into a habit and eventually—an addiction.

This addiction, like all addictions, becomes increasingly hard to satisfy which leads us further and further downstream towards increasingly intense dopamine releasing sources (e.g. doom-scrolling, gambling, nsfw content, etc). And this, of course, leads to derailed lives.

Rheotaxis is the general tendency of an organism—like a fish—to orient themselves and swim against the flow, rather than with it. And the more I look at the above diagram, the more I think they’re onto something. There are many theories on why fish do this, but the one I like to believe is that they know—be it instinctually or experientially—that upstream is where better living is found.

Maybe because it leads to the development of strength; maybe because it increases their mental acuity/awareness; maybe because it’s where the more fulfilling rewards are found…

…And maybe it’s the same for us humans and we should consider reorienting, too.

When Fast Slows Down

What could you do, right now, that would make someone want to send you a hand written thank you letter? …Or, maybe a modern day best, a thoughtful text or email reply?

…Answer this question and you’ll have some pretty great pitstop ideas you could take from the long and oftentimes tiresome travels of your day—your life.

Because while it’s crucial to begin with the end in mind—to keep in focus where it is we’re trying to go—it’s also crucial to find ways to pitstop, to wander, to enjoy the scenery and people along the way.

And the things we might do that would elicit a quick “thanks” or wave (or serve no purpose and elicit zero response) maybe aren’t the best places to pitstop. Maybe we could take that time, strategically add a little intention that’s harnessed from the question above, and emerge with a scenic detour that becomes an absolute highlight of the travels of our day—our life.

See, getting to our destination fast isn’t greater than getting to our destination full. And full happens when fast slows down and adds a little intention, awareness, and generosity along the way.


P.s. For a deep dive into this topic, check out my guide: The Art of Forward: Direction > Speed.

Goals Minus Time Commitment

If your weeks and months don’t contain pockets of time dedicated to your year and decade goals… you’re not serious about reaching them.

Think about what you want your health and fitness to be like in a year or a decade… and ask yourself, do the pockets of time inside your weeks and months match that kind of outcome?

Do the same for what you want your relationships, side hustles or finances, intellect or skill sets to be like in a year or a decade… and then take some time to reorganize this week’s or this month’s time.

Nothing contains regret more than goals minus any kind of regular time commitment.


P.s. In case you missed it, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.