Yesterday I tested one of my seven-year-old martial arts students for her next colored belt.
When I asked her to do push-ups, she reflexively said, “I can’t do that!”
And I, just as reflexively, responded with, “Say, ‘I’m going to try my best’ instead.”
And as she said it, you could see her body language update in real time.
“I can’t do that” elicited a frown, slouched shoulders, a hunched back, and a defeated plop on the mat before a single push-up was even attempted.
“I’m going to try my best” resulted in furrowed eyebrows, focused eyes, straightened posture, and an incredibly clean, full range-of-motion, off-the-knees push up.
We didn’t stop after just that one, of course, and I encouraged her to do as many more as she could on her knees for a designated amount of time.
…I wanted to make sure she had a chance to really give the exercise a good effort so that she knew she was capable of more than she thought—even though I think she had already surprised herself after that first off-the-knees rep.
Here’s the thing: as it is for kids, so too should it be for us adults.
We might not blurt out, “I can’t do that” anymore. But I can tell you right now, we all have encoded that exact message into our lives using alternate words.
“I’m too busy…”
“I’m too old…”
“I’m too out of shape…”
…Decoded? “I can’t do that.”
Maybe it’s not that you’re any of those… maybe it’s just that you’re telling yourself that you are.
Maybe you just need to tell yourself you’re going to try your best… and go do exactly that.