“The cancer is winning.” I was told today.
“One year. Maybe six months left to live.”
“I was doing great yesterday, but today, I’m not doing good at all.”
We sat together for a while. Both processing. Me blurting out a swear word every few minutes. Him slowly cluing me in to where his head was at.
“…I must stay positive.”
“…I have to keep trying to take class.”
“…I might be losing, but I am going to write this final chapter.”
And it was in those three lines that I think the words he needed to hear found him. All I did was emphasize, reinforce, and offer my full support.
Here’s why I think those three lines were so on point:
We must stay positive. Not delusionally positive while the world burns down around us. But strategically optimistic. So that we can see opportunity, believe that the world can be made into a better place, and trust in ourselves to act.
We must keep learning. Because if we’re not learning, we’re regressing. There is no stagnant. And what we find on the other side of our curiosities is legacy. Because curiosities lead to topic, topic leads to creation, creation leads to tribe, and tribe… well, tribe is who carries forth our legacy after we’re gone.
We must control what’s within our control. There was nothing left to do. Cancer was winning. But choosing how to spend his remaining time? Who to spend that time with? What words he wanted to author on the final pages of his life’s book? …All well within his control. And exactly where the mind should be focused when all else feels so uncontrollable.