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Category: Understanding Love

Vibe Over Everything

Published on March 12, 2025

Feeling awful from the toxic cycle of hate, division, and fear that is constantly spewing from your modern day screens? Let me offer you some top tier advice:

Go to more music shows.

I have yet to experience another place on earth that is more universally uniting, accepting, and love spewing—generally speaking and with some exceptions.

The thing about music is that it emphasizes vibe above everything. And removes from the emphasis divisive topics and accompanying differences.

The thing about us humans is that we all want to feel seen and heard. And we want to experience the good vibes that result in joy, excitement, and pleasure. Nobody truly wants the opposite of that. Which is why music is such an incredible medium… it connects people from a vibrational standpoint and then facilitates the flow of good vibes that come from that connection (feeling seen and heard) and the music itself.

It allows us to meet others from a vibrational standpoint first. It allows us to see what unites us first. It allows us to find the common ground between one another first.

And then…

And then… how much better it will be to discuss divisive topics and differences…

Never Settle

Published on March 5, 2025

A friend of mine just recently broke up with her boyfriend.

And as we were talking about it, there was one line I said to her that I thought was worth passing on:

“We tend to get what we settle for in life… and by refusing to settle for coldness, mistreatment, and emotional cheating… you’re moving more of the opposite into your future. Believe that.”

This is what we mean when we say, “Never settle.”

It’s not a motion to never settle per se.

It’s a reminder to never settle for anything less than what you truly deserve. And by knowing what that is and moving away from anything that ain’t it… you’re allowing your future self to finally settle with someone who knows how to treat you for all that you’re worth.

Mixing Prompts With Initiative

Published on February 25, 2025

I called a martial arts friend from another organization yesterday and said something along the lines of, “Hey! I’m interested in doing some collaborative work with you… here’s kind of what I’m thinking… [insert thoughts here]… what do you think?”

And let me just say… you’d be surprised how far a simple prompt mixed with a little initiative like this might take you.

What Are You Looking To Find?

Published on February 24, 2025

While scrolling through Pinterest, I stumbled across a question: “What do you scroll for? What are you looking to find?”

In my case, I was looking for inspiration. Inspiration for myself and inspiration I could share with others. To take it a step further, I was looking for pathways that might take me into myself. I was looking for triggers for inner work. I was looking for understanding and depth that’s digestible and appealing.

Not too long ago, I recognized that my social media platforms of choice were causing me to undervalue myself. I was looking at everything I wanted to be… everything I wanted to have… everyone I wanted to be with…

And it was taking me further and further away from myself.

And it’s not like there isn’t anything inherently wrong with looking at those things… but, it became toxic for me. It wasn’t serving me… it wasn’t leading to growth… it was only leading to self-limiting beliefs and defeatist mentalities. So I quit and focused my attention elsewhere.

What I’m finding interesting now is that I’m back on those same platforms, but with a completely changed mindset. I started following creative music accounts—mostly DJs sharing tips, tricks, live performances, and so on. And I’m loving it again.

…What am I looking to find?

Inspiration that’ll help me build my skills and expand my musical understanding. To take it a step further, I’m looking for ways I can better connect to the present moment via music and dance… ideas that’ll help me create moments and spaces like this for others… and opportunities to just celebrate life with seas of strangers.

…What are YOU looking to find?

On Calling People When You “Don’t Have Much To Say, Though…”

Published on February 23, 2025

I had a moment twice today when I was thinking about calling someone and then thought to myself, “Ehhh… I don’t really have much to say though…”

But, I forced myself to call them anyway—in both instances.

The first call ended up lasting about 15 minutes.

And the second call ended up lasting 45 minutes.

…It was a reminder that I don’t have to have the whole conversation figured out ahead of time.

…All that’s needed is an intention, a simple train of thought or question, and a willingness to listen.

The rest tends to take care of itself.

P.s. ICYMI you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week here.

On Drinking Poison

Published on February 5, 2025

One of my students was telling me about a friend who has become increasingly toxic in her life.

She brings miserable energy, gossips constantly, and gaslights people into conflicts.

The problem, she continued, is that she’s also lonely and constantly reaches out for connection and help.

While there’s no easy, universal answer to a situation like this (there are many nuances that should be considered in each individual situation)—the bottom line I told her is this: your primary duty in life is and should always be to protect and prioritize yourself and your own wellbeing first.

…Without that, everything else collapses.

And if a friend—or family member even—is causing you mental, emotional, or physical harm… then you need to prioritize them OUT of your life.

The how is largely going to depend on the individual circumstances. In some cases, it may need to be done drastically and all at once. In others, it may need to be done slowly and discreetly. But, that it needs to happen is almost undeniable.

…Think about it like this: how much poison is an acceptable amount of poison to drink daily?

None.

Obviously.

Does this mean you should avoid all toxicity like poison? Not necessarily. Pick your battles and fight your fight when you need to. But the reality of life is: nobody is coming to save us—we must save ourselves.

And drawing clear boundaries doesn’t make you a bad person (only gaslighters will make you think that)… they make you a BETTER one. And the better you become, ironically, the more you’ll be able to help others with the extra strength and energy you’ve saved.

On Simplifying Religion

Published on February 5, 2025

While at Jayh’s wake last week… one of the pastors made a comment that stuck with me.

He said something along the lines of, “Why complicate religion? Forget all of the endless interpretations from the endless lines of religious text and simplify. For me, it all boils down to two lines: Love God and Love Thy Neighbor. Period.”

And he continued by saying if what you’re doing in life doesn’t model those two lines, then you need to check your religion.

This reflects one of my core beliefs that comes from the Dalai Lama. When asked to define his religion he said, “My religion is kindness.” …And if there’s any concept that needs to be more closely interpreted for integration into life practice… it’s that line.

Don’t miss the forest for the trees. Don’t get caught up in the nuances. Don’t overthink what most religious texts try to make predominantly and abundantly clear… LOVE is the bottom line. KINDNESS is the interpretation. TOWARDS ALL is who we should include in our practice. NOW… TODAY… is when it’s needed.

…More than ever.