“How do you know when you’re in love?” She asked.
When the desire for pleasure is gone… And yet… They’re still able to halt time.
I help busy people do inner work.
“How do you know when you’re in love?” She asked.
When the desire for pleasure is gone… And yet… They’re still able to halt time.
People shouldn’t have to work for your love.
Conditional love isn’t love at all. It’s manipulation.
Your love should flow unconditionally to all those who are within the range of its overflow.
…If they abuse this privilege, their access gets revoked. Simple as that.
…And they have to work to regain access to you.
But your love continues to flow.
With or without them.
Never forget: unconditional love does not mean unconditional tolerance.
In fact, unconditional love is a sacred energy that should be protected at all costs. Even more so than the ways in which you protect the money in your life.
For the value of money pales in comparison to the value of fully expressed and absorbed love.
I think love can most accurately be measured in moments of presence.
Because moments spent thinking of the past or spent spaced out and imagining the future aren’t moments you can also overflow in the now.
The moment your mind leaves the now… your love leaves with you.
Which isn’t to say we should never visit the past—there’s a time and a place for that.
And it isn’t to say you should never visit the future—how else can you chart out your life’s path?
It’s merely to say, the measure of your love isn’t equal to the total time spent with another person any more than it’s the measure of the total time you’ve spent with yourself.
Those who measure highest in self-love are the ones who have spent the most time in presence with themselves—working through the heavy, turbulent, crap times as much as they might’ve spent soaking in the more light, joyful, easy times. And so it is for those who measure the highest in joint love, too.
…If you’re looking for love, looking to rekindle a love, or looking to deepen your current love, I’d say, start with here.
Inner work prompt: Your turn. How do you think love can most accurately be measured?
One of my ex-employees (who went on to become a nurse) used to chronically clean and organize when she didn’t have anything to do.
…I can’t tell you how much I miss that small, big gift that she used to give.
In a world where people typically do what they have to do out of obligation (and not much more)… be the atypical outlier who gives away little Easter Eggs along the way.
The work is the work is the work… and doing the work isn’t what makes you indispensable / memorable… it’s the gifts you give along the way that do that.
P.s. If you enjoy these a.m. Easter Eggs, you can support their continued production here :)
Love isn’t a person, place, or thing. Love is the way you treat a person, how you choose to act in a given place, and the things you do that put you into a state of (self) love.
…Love is a way of being.
When love is a person, it leaves when the person leaves. When love is a specific place, it steals away your freedom in a world of possibilities. When love is merely a thing that is or isn’t, it takes away all of your control in the matter.
When love is a verb, however, the matter is in your hands.
It reminds you that love is created through action—not stagnation. And if you want things to be better—to be more loving and overflowing—then you have to do something about it. Waiting to be crowned with love by the noun god isn’t a good strategy.
Love is most present Where mind is most silent Closed to new thoughts Happens near the transcendent When the world is rejected For what's found right here Hold steady in the moment Imprint each detail clear You won't realize it Until it's well over and gone These moments of mindlessness Will be what carry you along
P.s. I also published: 26 Cole Schafer Quotes from One Minute, Please? on Love in a World of Conditions, Screens, and Pain
We are at our best when we’re radiating the warmth of love. Not towards one person, per se, but towards all of life.
And that warmth, as mentioned yesterday, is generally a composition of patience, kindness, joy, forgiveness, and gratitude.
Which means, a great question to consider as you go about your day and handle tasks, requests, surprises, confrontations, challenges, manipulations, curveballs, frustrations, adversities, irritations, unmet expectations, etc…
How can I use this or how can I respond to that in a way where it feeds the fire of my love (aka my patience, kindness, joy, forgiveness, and gratitude)?
Because if you’re unable to find a way to have it do either of those things… then the byproduct will be a more blocked love. It’s a binary path. We’re either feeding the fire of our love or blocking it.
And unless we’re finding ways to constantly feed those inner flames… it will slowly cool, fade, and eventually suffocate. And that’s the last thing we need in this already cold, harsh world.
What we need are more people who have found ways to perform at their best and can serve as brilliant sources of warmth and light—not just for themselves… but for us all.
P.s. This became the introduction for: An Exercise In Forgiveness—To Help You Let Go Of Anger and Find Peace