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Category: Transforming Pain

The Bridge Between Consumer and Creator

Published on July 3, 2022

Moving from consumer to creator can be intimidating.

Consuming is risk-free, relaxed, and dopamine-releasing—but, unfulfilling.

Creating is risk-taking, nerve-wracking, and self-exposing—but, rewarding.

One intermediary step that helped me is curating.

Which, many people don’t realize, is a form of creation in its own right.

Taking the best of what you find and creating your own unique content playlist(s) is an art form—one that highlights unique taste.

The best part is this: by immersing yourself in what speaks to you and your unique tastes—you’ll start making connections with your unique life experiences and ideas… it’s inevitable because you’ll only ever be pulled to curate what resonates.

And oftentimes, the byproduct of good curation over enough time will be creation.

Stop For Suffering

Published on June 24, 2022

Suffering is an internal state.

And you’ll never be able to outrun what’s inside.

In fact, the longer you try running from suffering the more time it’ll have to build strength and the more tired you’ll ultimately become.

The way towards healing isn’t running—no.

The way towards healing is stopping.

…And looking at the suffering; sitting with it; inquiring into its existence—understanding the suffering (that never just arbitrarily arrives).

And then slowly, slowly—rebuilding your strength while you drain it of its own.

Until eventually you can turn suffering into softness that you can then mold like clay and let go of like art.

Applying The 4 Noble Truths (from Buddhism)

Published on June 9, 2022

The First Noble Truth: life is suffering.

  • Childhood trauma
  • Diseases/ illnesses/ disorders
  • Heartbreak/ back-stabbing/ hate

The reality of life that we have to accept is that there will always be suffering present in some way/ shape/ form.

The Second Noble Truth: we can identify the causes of our suffering.

When your heart is broken or you’re diagnosed with a disease or illness, identifying the source of your suffering is relatively straightforward.

When we’re children, however, we tend to bury or distract ourselves from the pain because we don’t know how to properly manage it. And this behavior often carries over into adulthood.

It isn’t always obvious from where our pain originates. But, with patience, grace and care—we can identify our pain’s root causes.

The Third Noble Truth: we can put an end to our suffering and healing is possible.

Healing is possible.

The key is to mindfully sort through what’s outside of our control (what happened in our past) and to act on what’s within our control (our choices today).

The Fourth Noble Truth: there are paths to free us from suffering.

These paths are different for each of us. But, many of them contain the following:

  • Meditation
  • Introspective writing
  • Reading for healing
  • Self-care skill building
  • Vulnerable, authentic conversation
  • Therapy

And just like healing is possible, so is perpetual suffering.

If we don’t accept the second noble truth, we won’t reach the third. And without the third, we won’t reach the fourth.

Take your journey towards healing at your own pace—but, keep moving forward on the path. Think tortoise—not hare.

And transform your suffering into a new, better reality—one deliberate, brave choice at a time.

Breathing Space For Your Face

Published on June 7, 2022

We all wear masks.

…It isn’t a bad strategy.

  • We smile at strangers—even when we’re sad.
  • We cheer for good news—even when we’re envious.
  • We share life highlights—and play mum about our life low points.

It’s when we don’t take our masks off that the strategy turns bad.

  • If we never confront that sadness—we’ll multiply its effects.
  • If we never confront that envy—we’ll only perpetuate it forward.
  • If we never talk about our low points—we’ll only force the pain deeper through suppression.

We need to give our “face” space to breathe.

  • When we’re feeling sad, we need to have an outlet—mine is silent meditation.
  • When we’re feeling envious, we need to have an outlet—mine is introspective writing.
  • When we’re feeling overwhelmed by our lows, we need to have an outlet—mine is conversation with people I trust.

My question for you is: are you giving your face enough space to breathe?

Fate vs. Legacy

Published on May 28, 2022

Fate is what results when life decides for you.

Legacy is what results when you decide your life.