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Category: Transforming Pain

On Being Present With Those Who Suffer Loss

Published on May 15, 2025

A martial arts friend of mine lost his dog last week.

In a post about it, he said, “Honestly, there are no words for what I’m feeling right now. Like I said in an earlier post, if I want to talk about it, I will. But please don’t leave the usual comments—’Sorry for your loss,’ ‘He’s in a better place,’ and so on. I know people mean well, but those words just pick at the wound and make it harder to heal.”

I know this pain all too well with how I ended up losing my dog, Stella.

And while I, too, have no words for getting through this type of pain or how to deal with these types of emotions… what I can say is that presence is the best gift any of us can provide.

And not necessarily presence in the sense of being with him in person… I know that wasn’t what I wanted when I was going through it—I wanted to crawl into a cave and wall myself in.

I mean presence in the sense of keeping them present in your mind and actions. By embodying the best of what each of them represent and passing that forward in the best way you can. By engaging with the material that’s posted and finding ways to celebrate the life of an animal that meant so much. By showing up and being there in person when it’s appropriate and well timed.

Sometimes words just pick at the wound.

But presence… the energy that’s felt when another enters your awareness… when it has the right intention and vibration… is generally received as a healing warmth.

The Duality Of Insight

Published on May 12, 2025

After I upload a quote to MoveMe Quotes, it’s important I tag it with the appropriate topics/themes.

For example, I uploaded a quote today that reads, “You start dying slowly if you do not travel, if you do not read, if you do not listen to the sounds of life, if you do not appreciate yourself. You start dying slowly when you kill your self-esteem; when you do not let others help you. You start dying slowly if you avoid to feel passion and their turbulent emotions; those which make your eyes glisten and your heart beat fast. You start dying slowly if you do not change your life when you are not satisfied with your job, or with your love, if you do not risk what is safe for the uncertain, if you do not go after a dream, if you do not allow yourself at least once in your lifetime, to run away from sensible advice…” ~ Pablow Neruda

Now, obviously this quote is about death—and how not to die slowly—so I tag it “Death Quotes.”

But… more importantly, this quote is about living—and how to truly live before you die—so I tag it “Living Quotes.”

And this duality is an important concept to understand when dealing with insight.

If you want to understand life—study death. If you want to understand death—study life. If you want to understand self-love—study self-hate. If you want to understand self-hate—study self-love. If you want to understand connection—study solitude. If you want to understand solitude—study connection. And so on.

Are you studying the duality of the problem(s) you’re facing in your life?

All It Takes Is An Apple Eaten Wrong

Published on May 6, 2025

All it takes is an apple eaten a little too quickly…

A little too mindlessly…

For it to become lodged in your throat…

With not enough room to pass liquid, but just enough room to pass a pinch of air…

…For you to remember how fragile life is.

It took 15 minutes of coughing, spitting, and throat contorting to finally pass that apple clog.

And in each passing moment of pain and fear, I became increasingly aware of the tightrope of life I was walking.

…The same one that I’m always walking, but somehow perceive more like a curb… or sidewalk… or highway even—the longer I’m removed from run-ins with death.

But, don’t get it twisted…

The path we walk is not any wider than the width of a rope.

And each step needs to be taken deliberately and mindfully…

Because if it’s not…

All it takes is one misstep or slip up—an apple eaten wrong—for it to all go away.

Inner Ponds Need Outlets

Published on April 25, 2025

I uploaded a quote today to MoveMe Quotes that read, “Art is a safe place to explore and express all emotions. No feeling is taboo. It’s about being sensitive to what your body is telling you, then using your art to set the emotion free.”

Without some form of an outlet… our emotions continue to pour into a type of static, stale, toxicity-prone pond within.

Art is an incredibly powerful means of creating an outlet for that pond.

And slowly, slowly… as you explore and express your art… your emotions converge into more of a river and flow through your body and out into the medium of that chosen art.

Without this type of outlet, don’t you see how the emotions can swell within? Don’t you see how all of the grief, anger, frustration, loneliness, and sadness can intermix into a type of toxic stew… contaminating the whole vessel carrying it? Don’t you see how most passive entertainment and social media and news outlets only exacerbate that toxic stew…?

…Don’t you see how important it is to have an outlet?

…Don’t you see that’s what this daily blog is for me?

…Don’t you see that it’s about time you create an outlet for the inner pond within you?

Human Touch

Published on April 21, 2025

This coffee shop I’m sitting in—

…the one with the crooked neon signs, big bold sharpie-drawn posters taped to the front windows, and thrifted furniture where no two pieces are the same

…the one with Santa on the cabinet in April, that displays Amy’s soup cans for sale right across from the Pope Francis action figures, and has the dying indoor plant next to the thriving bamboo growing out of an elephant’s back

…the one with the over-baked cookies, where the smell of crushed coffee beans lingers next to the hipster Spotify tunes, and instagram QR codes are posted throughout so even when we leave their art isn’t something we just forget

—the one that reeks of human touch…

Is something I’m not so sure us humans will ever be able to program into 1s and 0s and artificially recreate.

In a world that threatens to replace humans like cogs in a machine… be so much more than 1s and 0s.

Don’t Waste Time Alone

Published on April 9, 2025

Don’t waste time alone.

Society might have you brainwashed into believing being alone is a bad thing. Like, “Why are you still single?” or “Did you go there alone?” or, you know, the looks and tones.

And social media might have you trained into believing that turning it on and scrolling is socially connecting you—so as to distract you from the alone.

And the feelings of boredom might make you cringe and restlessly pace in circles over doing anything still and meditative when your calendar appears blank and your battery charge goes.

But… being alone is not a bad thing.

Don’t… waste time alone.

Time alone is time that can be spent turned inward… exploring the inner landscapes… uncovering the hidden gems of insight buried within the depths of your mind.

Time alone is time that can be spent healing… unpacking and reflecting on pains of the past… bringing clarity to thoughts tangled by writing them down… absorbing information from the most brilliant minds to have ever arranged words into practical, life-changing ideas.

Time alone is time that can be spent present… slowing down from the rush of the modern day wave… soaking in the information that’s touching your senses in the here and now—that may never again touch again in the same way… being grateful for the experience of life—despite all of its ups and downs…

Being alone is not a bad thing.

In fact, it may very well be precisely the thing that more of us need.

Don’t… waste time alone.

P.s. If you enjoy these 1-min messages, would you reply with a 1-line testimony that I can add to this landing page? :)

Good Karma Is Always A Good Idea

Published on April 2, 2025

Spend a little time each day helping people while you still can…

It’s one of the best ways to ensure that when you need help, you’ll have people who not only can…

But want to and will.