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Category: Transforming Pain

What Advice Would You Give Your 17 Year Old Self?

Published on January 14, 2025

My dad once remarked that I was as “focused as a laser” when I was around 17. And he commented on how remarkable it was for someone at that age to be like that…

  • I was excelling in school.
  • I was in a serious relationship with an amazing girl.
  • I was three years into a job I loved and knew I wanted to make into a career.
  • I was competing at high level martial arts tournaments—and succeeding.
  • I had an incredible group of friends who knew how to have a good time.
  • And I had the most supportive and loving family throughout.

In hindsight, when I think back to this time and everything that would soon unfold over the next several years, I would probably tell myself to relax that laser a little and enjoy being a 17-year-old more.

…Because while being focused like a laser is a gift, so is wandering, exploring, and spending time experimenting while life is simpler and you’re living on somebody else’s dime.

Do I regret living how I did at 17? No. I know it’s precisely what made me into who I am today and I know that if I changed myself back then, the butterfly effect would probably have me in an upside down life that I actually did regret.

But, what’s important to remember is that my 17-year-old self is still inside me somewhere. As is every other version of who I’ve been in the past. And inner work conversations like this, with them, is precisely how my today self grows into the evolved version of that 17 year old…

…So I can live with that hindsight wisdom—today.

Respect

Published on January 12, 2025

I went out to eat dinner with six friends tonight.

After the meal we walked outside, but one friend was missing.

I glanced back in the restaurant and he was cleaning our table, stacking plates and cups, collecting all garbage, and tidying up in the best way he could.

When he finished, he walked out and I said, “respect.”

He replied by saying, “I was a server and know how it can be. Some people leave their space as an absolute disaster… I never want to be that person.”

And it was a good reminder that… neither do I.

Karma In Action

Published on January 11, 2025

I’m thinking about making a big musical equipment purchase.

What’s interesting is the thought I had about how I want to make the purchase.

See, I know a guy who knows everything there is to know about audio and sound system setups. And he has taken care of me whenever I’ve called him for help—as in way overdelivered for the price he charged. And is just an absolute gem of a guy.

Rather than just seek out the amazon or cheapest price purchase, I want to make the purchase through this guy so that he gets a commission cut on it.

…I want to go out of my way to help the guy who has always helped me.

This, my friends, is how karma works.

Gustave Flaubert Quote On Being “Regular and Orderly” To Produce Your Best Work…

Published on January 8, 2025

“Be regular and orderly in your life, so that you may be violent and original in your work.”

Gustave Flaubert

Whenever I travel or experience any “violent” changes in routine… my creative work suffers.

…Simply because the time blocked for creative work shrinks in proportion to the amount of time exploring, problem solving, or engaging in unique experiences—expands.

And the days when creative work is the hardest is when I’m doing it at the end of my day, right before bed, when I’m exhausted, and as a last minute obligation because it’s a commitment I want to honor.

…But you know what?

I have yet to regret a post I’ve published.

Even one of the posts I’ve written at 3am after a long night out.

…And you know what’s more?

I have yet to regret an adventure I’ve taken.

If anything, it’s the adventures that have lead to some of my best creative work.

…But you know what most people miss?

It’s the time blocked after the adventures, where I’m able to unpack it all and do some creative work, where the vibrance and meaning of the adventures come to full fruition.

See, it isn’t the “regular and orderly life” that exclusively leads to the “violent and original work” just like it isn’t an adventurous and spontaneous life that would only lead to “regular” work.

It’s the harmony of both elements that we need in our lives: the adventure and the ordinary; the violent and the regular; the spontaneous and the routine.

This is where (and how) our best work lives.

P.s. ICYMI you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.

When Death Pulls Up A Chair

Published on January 6, 2025

“There’s something sobering about moments when mortality decides to pull up a chair and join you for a chat. It doesn’t matter who you are, how much kale you’ve eaten, or whether you can still squeeze into your high school jeans on your 60th birthday. (Spoiler Alert: I cannot). Mortality reminds us that we’re all just passing through, and none of us gets to skip the check-out line. Death doesn’t discriminate. But here’s the twist: Mortality isn’t here to ruin the party. It’s here to remind us to live.” ~ Craig Misewicz

When mortality pulls up a chair… join in for the chat.

In our society, there’s too much walking away, hiding from, and shoving our heads in the sand.

Death gets hidden in hospital rooms and long-term care facilities. It gets sanitized by medical professionals and dressed up by funeral homes. It gets outsourced to a few so that the rest can live without being reminded…

But, being reminded is precisely the point.

Death doesn’t discriminate and none of us get to skip the check-out line.

And if we pretend like it does and we might… we’re in for an abrupt awakening.

Because at some point, we won’t be able to walk away, hide from, or shove our head in the sand any longer. We’re going to be forced to have that chat. And when we do… when we finally wake up… there might not be much time left.

See having that chat doesn’t take away from life—it adds to it.

…It reminds us of our priorities and of what really matters. It gives us the push we might need to do those things. It reminds us… to live.

Taking Rebirths Seriously

Published on December 26, 2024

I found myself doing a deathbed meditation today.

Imagining what my regrets would be if I knew my life was coming to an end tonight…

And let me tell you… it brought up some pretty powerful visions and wishes.

I encourage you to spend some time doing the same. Take it seriously. See what comes up.

The upcoming new year is like a rebirth… as was the last new year… and the one before that.

Heck, each day is a rebirth or sorts, isn’t it?

Why spend time imagining something as morbid as laying on your deathbed for an extended period of time, you ask?

…Because the deeper you feel what it’s like to actually be on that deathbed, the more likely you’ll be to actually take these upcoming rebirths seriously.

P.s. Some fun updates on MoveMe Quotes as of today: (1) You can now click to get random quotes, picture quotes, and articles—perfect for spontaneous visits (in the header menu). (2) You can search within categories now (finally!)(e.g. Instead of searching “love quotes” and pulling up everything we’ve ever tagged with it, you can now search “love quotes” within the Picture Quotes category…!)(Can be found in the directory). (3) You can change the language of the entire website with a single click. Language options can be found in the header menu. Hope these updates help! Enjoy!

Craving, Attachment, and Desire

Published on December 16, 2024

Edgar Allen Poe once said, “All suffering originates from craving, from attachment, from desire.”

I want you to take a minute to reflect on the suffering you’re experiencing in your life right now.

…Can you trace the root of the suffering back to one of these causes?

If so, I want you to next identify whether the suffering is a superficial creation done by social media, mass marketing, and/or living in a materialistic culture… or if it’s created from something deeper.

Some suffering is meant to be felt. Heartbreak; loss; wrongdoing… this is the kind of suffering that makes you truly appreciate… that wakes you up to your purpose… that turns your attention inward and forces inner growth.

…And some suffering is completely unnecessary and doesn’t need to be felt at all.