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Category: Priorities

There Is No Substitute For Quality Time

…Period.

  • When it comes to family? …There is no substitute for quality time.
  • When it comes to friends? …There is no substitute for quality time.
  • When it comes to personal growth? …There is no substitute for quality time.
  • When it comes to creative work? …There is no substitute for quality time.
  • When it comes to business growth? …There is no substitute for quality time.

The repetition of this message is important.

Because in a world featuring A.I. advancements, virtual reality, virtual assistants, done-for-you growth packages, algorithmic connection, and so on… the opposite message is being sent infinitely more times than what’s listed above.

It’s more important now than ever before to remind yourself…

…There is no substitute for quality time.

P.s. The Art of Forward (Part 2): Consistency > Intensity is DONE. The big drop happens THIS weekend. Sneak peak here and here. Stay tuned…! You’re going to see it here first :)

Less, Less, Less

Rather than asking yourself: “What else do I need to do today?” or “What else can I get done today?”

Try asking yourself: “What don’t I need to do today?” or “What can be crossed off my list?”

The modern day default is to add, add, add. More tasks done equals a more productive day. A more productive day equals a greater return. A greater return is what hustle culture deems as being the worthwhile reward.

…But, a greater return equals… what exactly?

This is where a lot of people get their formulas confused. Do greater returns equal more happiness or more material purchases? Do greater returns equal more quality time or more quality brands? Do greater returns equal more freedom or more responsibilities?

Maybe it’s worth considering an approach of less, less, less.

Maybe less tasks done equals a more productive day—not just because it was more focused on higher priority tasks, but because it was more appropriately balanced with all of your life’s priorities—instead of just work. And a more balanced day equals a greater return in each of your life’s domains. And maybe a greater return from each of life’s domains is what actually leads to more happiness, quality time, and freedom?


P.s. 23 Greg McKeown Quotes from Essentialism and How To Live Better Via Less

Overstimulating Pixels vs Uncomfortable Quietness

Overstimulating pixels vs uncomfortable quietness is THE modern day dilemma.

So many of the negative symptoms people experience in our modern world have to do with this boiled down and plainly stated challenge.

And as is true with any negatively experienced symptoms or illnesses in life, we can’t work to fight what we can’t name or don’t understand. It’s only after we understand what it is we’re up against, that we can start to work strategically to fight back.

With the awareness of the challenge laid out in front of us, hopefully more people can move into that uncomfortable quietness and get, what I consider to be, a taste of the antidote to the overstimulating pixels.

…And see how, with regular doses, their lives may start feeling less agitated, insufficient, anxiety-inducing, depressing, lonely, nerve-wracking, etc.

So many of our modern day problems can be solved with this, almost too easy, ancient and yet timeless solution—quietness.

And as much as you might want to consume more and more pixilated videos and articles explaining to you how to reduce anxiety, stop overthinking, improve self-image, etc… consider the idea that it’s the pixels themselves that are at the root of the cause of the negative symptoms.

My prescription to you is this: practice making uncomfortable quietness, comfortable again—and watch as your life slowly starts to improve and feel better.


P.s. Thank you to Samantha who inspired this post. Your email reply was refreshing to read.

Frustrated

What frustrates me isn’t social media.

What frustrates me isn’t passive entertainment.

What frustrates me isn’t big media/ advertising/ marketing.

What frustrates me is lack of intention.

What frustrates me is lack of self-awareness.

What frustrates me is the massive time suck / loss of potential the above mentioned things facilitate.

…There is a time and a place for social media, passive entertainment, and other media… but every waking second that we’re not otherwise doing some active task isn’t it.

What frustrates me is the inability to stand in line without our phones, the inability to sit at home alone without a screen on, the inability to go the duration of one singular day without checking every social media site.

Because in all of those waking seconds when we’re not actively tied up doing other obligatory things… we could be reading from the greatest books ever written, writing from the depths of our soul, uniquely expressing ourselves in our chosen field of art, having real life interactions with real life people who are desperate for real life connection, and otherwise—doing nothing at all. Just sitting, thinking, reflecting, digesting, and coming to terms with what it all means—to us. Not to our parents, teachers, friends, lovers, or favorite influencers—to us.

So that we can interact with it all (everything listed above included) with intention, self-awareness, and mindfulness. Because without it, I fear that our interactions with social media, passive entertainment, and big media will only continue to scale unintentionally—and what we see when we look back will be huge chunks of life and potential gone… just gone… with no correlating memories and no chance of returns or exchanges.

Distractionary In Nature

Over the past few months, I have been focused on reducing screen time—particularly as it pertains to using social media apps.

I have largely stopped posting, turned off essentially all notifications, and am being more mindful of the itches that arise to open and scroll.

This past Saturday, however, I had a moment where I decided to scratch that itch and check IG. Before I knew it, I was already 1 hour deep into a video binge of a Brazilian couple’s dancing page. Not joking. They were completely captivating and shared great content—but, it wasn’t how I wanted to spend an hour of my day.

This is the kind of thing that happens all of the time, with so many of us.

Hours and hours drained from our days watching content that’s captivating and well produced (this isn’t a shot at the content), but that’s distractionary in nature and veers us from our main path. My current path, for example, is to reallocate the time saved and put it towards IRL meetups, reading, meditation, deep work, and/or sleep.

How much better my Sunday might’ve felt, I wonder to myself, if I hadn’t stayed up that extra hour Saturday night scrolling through IG? And I wonder the same for you and how much better you might feel if you reallocated just 1 hour/ week of distractionary in nature media and put it towards something better?


Day 3 of #15DaysofGratitude: Thankful that I grew up in a time where screen time wasn’t a concern—having a no-screen-foundation helps me to navigate this modern, screen driven world in a way that those who only know the screen-filled life… can’t imagine.

Sacred Spaces

“I have to draw a boundary with my mom.”

…A friend was telling me apprehensively as we finished a morning run.

“She’s trying to come with me to yoga class at my yoga studio—which is something I would love for her to get into—but that’s my sacred space.”

To which I replied… “You’re absolutely right.”

It doesn’t matter who the person is or how important they are in your life—your mom, your sibling, your spouse—there are some things you simply need to do for yourself which sometimes need to be done by yourself.

Period.

Because you know who’s more important than your mom, your sibling, or your spouse?

…You are.

And if you don’t recognize that and prioritize things in your life that make you feel collected/calm/sane—then it’s the very people who you’re prioritizing over yourself who’ll experience the adverse effects of that. Pretty backwards, eh?

So if there are spaces that need to be held sacred so you can have necessary releases in your practice? Then you hold those spaces sacred.

If there are activities you’re doing that allow you to express and connect in a way that’s disrupted by the presence of others? Then you draw that boundary.

If your mental health and sanity is telling you that you need to do a thing for your mental health and sanity—then it’s your loved ones, more than anyone else, who should understand and support you. Not object, take offense, and make you feel bad.

The relationship we have with ourself needs to count. It deserves to be prioritized. And like any relationship, it requires dedicated time. Never feel bad about giving yourself time.

What They Say and What You Do

“Build a social media empire!” They say.

“Post every day! Interact with as many people as possible!” They say.

“Tik Tok is where it’s at! Oh, but don’t forget about your Instagram! YouTube will really bring in the bucks!” They say.

To which I say… “No thanks.”

It’s not for me.

For every moment I’d be spending crafting the perfect thumbnail, worrying about stupid lighting, and fine-tuning the perfect 1-second pitch to capture almost non-existent digital attention… I could be spending in deep thought; wrestling with words; exploring the depths…

Which isn’t to say there’s anything wrong with building a social media empire. It’s undoubtedly an incredibly powerful tool and there are plenty of people who do it brilliantly.

It’s merely to say—it’s not for everybody. And you shouldn’t feel bad about yourself if it’s not for you. Do what makes sense to you and play to your strengths.

What they say and what you do should have nothing to do with each other.


P.s. I also published: 15 Aytekin Tank Quotes from Automate Your Busywork To Help You Reclaim Your Time