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Category: Thinking Clearly

Hard Stops vs. Soft Stops

Time management trick: define whether each task of your day should have a “hard stop” or “soft stop.”

  • Hard stop: Non-negotiable end to a task. e.g. 11pm is a hard-stop because sleep is a top priority. I don’t allow myself to work at even 11:01pm.
  • Soft stop: Flexible end to a task. e.g. Usually, I write between 2pm – 3pm. But, if the writing is flowing smooth and I’m in the zone, I allow myself to ride that momentum until it ends.

The problem with getting these confused is that it mostly hurts your top priorities.

Top priority tasks should be treated as “soft stops,” but are often treated as “hard stops.” Things like sleep, family time, exercise, writing, reading, connecting with friends, etc.—you should be able to spend whatever amount of time feels right. But, either you force yourself to cut it short or you don’t have enough time to allot.

Which leads to the second confusion: treating tasks that should be “hard stops” as “soft stops.” Things like TV, video games, social media time, etc—you can easily end up spending entire days doing these types of things if you don’t take control. And when you don’t, that excessive time gets taken from—that’s right—your top priorities.

And it turns into a vicious cycle.

Not enough time to do what’s most important because you spent too much time doing what’s not. And because you have less time, you’re constantly playing catch up.

So, what’s the solution? Give what’s less important tighter “hard stops” and then you’ll finally get to enjoy “soft stops” while doing what’s more.

What Hustle Culture Doesn’t Say

Sometimes the most productive thing we can do is nothing at all.

Hustle culture tells us otherwise.

Hustle culture says:

  • Beat the rest by outworking the rest.
  • Give 110% all of the time—no days off.
  • There will be plenty of time to sleep when you die.

But, what hustle culture fails to tell us is:

  • Burnout is real.
  • If we don’t take optional rests, we’ll experience forced shutdowns.
  • 100% can only ever come after a full charge. What might feel like your 100% might actually only be your 48% max because your battery is drained.
  • Consistency is more important than intensity. And trying to consistently give more than your 100% max effort on a daily basis is about as asinine as trying to sprint a marathon.
  • Sleep now or die sooner.

Turn down the volume on hustle culture. Turn up the volume on the whispers of your body.

If there’s anything you should prioritize in the new year that will best help you reach your goals, it should be more blocks of nothing.

Space where you can deliberately recharge, check in with your body, and adjust your pace.

Not more ways you can work at a suboptimal levels for the sake of getting diminishing returns only to end up rebounding back to where you originally started.

No. This year, don’t add more hustle to your resolutions—add un-hustle.

There’s More To You

It never ceases to amaze me how much we can learn from ourselves when we actually take the time to sit and clearly write the content of our minds.

We have an entire lifetime of experience, have processed an unfathomable amount of raw information, and have one of the most powerful computers synthesizing it all 24/7.

Don’t undermine yourself. Don’t sell yourself short. Don’t underestimate your abilities.

There’s more to you than you think.

The *Real* Key

Sometimes, standing between you and your next level of growth is a locked door.

And quickly trying to kick it down doesn’t work (like it might for some other doors).

No. This door, needs the right key.

But, which one is it?

We’re told all of the time that:

  • Consistency is key.
  • Humility is key.
  • Gratitude is key.
  • Self-awareness is key.
  • Patience is key.

How to know which one is the real key?

Well, there’s only one way to find out.

Try each.

Here’s the thing: all of these keys are easily accessible and free for you to use. Heck, you can even add each of them to your key ring and use them daily if you’re up to it.

The real key is to stop trying to rashly kick down doors and to use what’s right in your hands.

Important Big > Urgent Little

When you solve the big problems what you might find is that the little problems take care of themselves.

Like, when you solve sleep.

Suddenly, you won’t need to spend so much time thinking about snoozing, caffeine, being late, battling fatigue, managing grumpy moods, hiding bags under your eyes, etc.

Or, when you solve healthy habits.

Suddenly, you won’t spend so much of your day feeling like crap, thinking about your weight, battling your lazy mind, trying to hide your body, figuring out how to treat symptoms, considering fad diets, trying out trendy workouts, questioning your self-worth, etc.

Or, when you solve gratitude.

Suddenly, you won’t feel like you’re constantly in a state of lack; like you need to hustle for more money; like you need to beat the people you’re comparing yourself to; like you need to buy the latest and greatest; like happiness is forever on the other side of a fleeting finish line.

Don’t let the urgent little overtake the important big.

Talking, Edited

Writers block is a real problem for many people. But, talkers block? It isn’t even a thing.

Well, what is writing but talking, edited?

If you try to turn your writing into something that sounds completely foreign to how you talk—of course it’s going to be a real problem.

You’re trying to write down words in a way you’d never usually use them.

Don’t do that.

Write how you talk.

Then, after you’ve said all that you can think to say—edit. Make it better. Cut out the fluff. Reorganize what you said for clarity. Give your trains of thought some tracks.

Authenticity is what makes great writing great—not fancy words and complex grammar application.

Commit to being more yourself in your writing and suddenly, writers block disappears.

Because what’s blocking you from writing isn’t the words you could say (I’m sure there’s plenty you could say about any given topic), it’s the pseudo-persona you’re trying to embody when it comes time to write.

Protect Your Center

People are going to judge.

Let them.

People are going to gossip.

Let them.

People are going to hate.

Let them.

DON’T, however, let them steal your center.

For when you let them steal your center, you lose your clarity.

And it’s when you’ve lost your clarity that you begin judging, gossiping and hating all the same.