Category: Defining Success

Confidence is success remembered.

If you define success as getting a standing ovation after a TED Talk, then you’re going to have confidence issues.

If you define success as doing something that’s a little more than what you did before, then growing confidence will hardly be an issue.

With that in mind, here’s your formula: own your definition of success + make collecting “successes” a regular priority = watch your confidence grow.

Nobody sets out to lose.

Winning is—in some way/shape/or form—the goal for all of us.

Ironically enough, not winning is often the best means to winning.

It challenges us, humbles us, evokes curiosity, and introduces us to grit—if we channel it.

If we don’t, not winning can lead to discouragement, self-doubt, and result in surrender.

And what most people will say with this insight is: never surrender; persevere; don’t give up; channel losses into fuel; ignore self-doubt etc.

Worth considering, however: if you want to start winning more, maybe the trick isn’t to force yourself to ignore feelings of discouragement, self-doubt, and surrender.

Maybe the trick to winning more is to define for yourself a game where the natural byproduct of “not winning” is humility, curiosity, and grit.

Because what you need to always consider is that you may be playing the wrong game.

When you align your aptitudes, abilities, and interests with the right type of challenge/ game, the question of “how can I motivate myself to keep going” dissolves.

And the question that quickly appears in its place is “how can I stop myself from playing this game so much so that I can eat food, interact with humans, and get more sleep.”

A million seconds is 11 days.

A billion seconds is slightly over 31 years.

Sure, a billion dollars is cool and all…

But, how cool is a billion seconds??

…WAY cooler.

Here’s the deal: most people trade their billion seconds for as much money as they can possibly collect—which rarely ever amounts to anything near a billion dollars.

Here’s what’s ironic: billionaires—the people who actually manage to collect that much—would trade back their billion dollars for a billion seconds in a heartbeat.

No hesitation.

The bottom line: Only trade time for money if you have to—out of necessity. Otherwise, spend your time doing what you love—there’s no better way to spend your time.

And that’s where the real billionaires are found.

1. Growth – Because if you’re not growing, you’re regressing—there is no maintaining. And success should never consist of regressing. You should always be learning—from tasks, projects, challenges, mistakes—of course. But, also from mentors, co-workers, and resources made available to you as part of the work. Ask yourself: Am I realizing my potential or regressing each day? Like the stock market, am I trending upward or downward? What can I do to improve the current trend of my graph?

2. Contribution – Are you really successful if your success is only being celebrated, shared, and enjoyed by you and you alone? I’ll tell you what success alone is—it’s sad. Taking what you’ve gained and sharing it with others? Helping people who are struggling, similar to how you were struggling before, and seeing them overcome similar obstacles as a result of your efforts? Feeling like you’re making an impact on a scale that’s greater than just you? That isn’t sad at all. In fact, that’s quite admirable, impressive, and rewarding.

3. Presence – Because, heck, if you aren’t enjoying the ride and are tirelessly just hoping to arrive, what kind of success is that? Success isn’t found at some arrival point. Success is found in the daily grind; in the hustle; in the how our days are being spent. Because if we don’t find meaning or joy in the work we’re doing—why are we doing it? Other than to provide for the needs of yourself or loved ones, your why should be inspected carefully. Years spent miserably aren’t offset by a day of arrival. In fact, it’s precisely how our years are spent where success (or not) will ultimately be defined.

The new successful isn’t busy, it’s unbusy.

Being the “busy executive” has been seen by too many as the epitome of success and it’s leading people to live wildly unbalanced lives.

There are 168 hours in the week. Minus 8 hours / night for sleeping = 112 hours. Minus 2 hours / day for eating and food prepping = 98 hours. Minus 1 hour / day for exercise and wellbeing = 105 hours.

Which leaves 15 hours / day for work, relationships, personal growth, and fun.

15 hours / day.

How is it that we’re too busy for family? For friends? For reading? For writing? For learning? For fun? How is it that we manage to fill so much of our days with busy-ness?

15 hours / day should be plenty.

Even on the days when you work 8 hours, that’s still 7 hours left for your other priorities!

It’s as if the equation for success is: busy = important = successful. And so if busy goes up, important goes up. And if important goes up, successful goes up. But, does it really?

If time is our most valuable asset—then how can we be rich if we’re time-poor?

If it’s true that time is our most valuable resource, then shouldn’t time-rich be the ultimate rich?

Long term trust is exponentially better than short term money.

Because when I trust you, I tell other people about you.

And when I don’t, I also tell other people about you.

What gets said in each conversation has the potential to either exponentially help or hinder your growth in whatever business you’re involved in.

Am I going to refer 10 friends to you or tell my 10 friends never to cross paths with you?

Because whatever I tell them is probably what they’re going to tell their 10 friends, too.

Rather than forcing a sale, always say what you would do if you were them.

And be damn honest about.

When you treat others the way you want to be treated; you’ll always get paid in full.