Category: Living Well

Drifting Downstream

Published on June 14, 2023

The mind is no pond.

The mind is a river.

Constantly moving and circling and crashing…

If we want to keep certain thoughts at the top of our mind, we need to make a deliberate effort to paddle those thoughts forward—to the forefront—or else they will slowly drift downstream and into the darker parts of our conscious/ subconscious mind.

There is no thought that just floats unmoving in the forefront—especially no thought that we WANT to keep at the forefront.

Those thoughts need to be paddled, brought forward intentionally through effort, and done so regularly as the stream is always flowing.

And while the stream may present some good at the forefront, it also presents a ton of crap, too. Especially for those who dump toxic, wasteful, comparative junk into the rivers of their mind via media, news, and gossip.

So, just because you’ve had a great thought once—or a thousand times for that matter—don’t assume that it’s “in your mind” and that it can be checked off your list.

Nope.

It, too, will drift downstream—from top of mind to bottom of the subconscious, like water running down a mountain, as all thoughts do—and continue to do so until you choose to paddle it back forward.

So, if you want to have gratitude, optimism, and love, for example, at the forefront of your mind as you go about your days… you’ll need to plan the padding of those thoughts into your days, too.

And every day you don’t paddle, the further downstream those thoughts will go.

P.s. For paddle inspiration, bookmark this page. I post 2-5 quotes daily for my own mind’s sake.

You Are What You Do (And Don’t Do)

Published on June 12, 2023

Are you angry? Or are you overtired and just need a nap?

Are you anxious? Or are you pent up and just need to get some exercise?

Are you arrogant? Or are you distracted and just need to practice gratitude?

Are you sluggish? Or are you dehydrated and just need to drink more water?

Are you alone? Or are you expecting everybody else to take the initiative and haven’t sent out any invitations yourself or signed up for any new group activities?

Are you depressed? Or are you spending too much time on social media comparing yourself to others and just need to delete your accounts or have a screen fast?

It may not be as simple as that. But, in many cases—it is.

This is a reminder to stay on top of the basics.

P.s. I also published: To My Daughter. [Excerpt]

Invest In The Light

Published on June 11, 2023

I have an indoor plant sitting next to my kitchen sink that’s on the side of a window.

About half of the plant’s branches see sunlight and the other half doesn’t.

Earlier this week, as I went to wash the dishes, the growth imbalance was impressively noticeable. It honestly looked as though the plant might tip into the sink because of how long the branches reached on the sunshine side.

So, I spun it 180 degrees.

Glancing at it today, I was blown away at how quick its response was.

All of the little buds that were poking out from the branches on the old sunshine side have been effectively cancelled and tons of new little buds on the new sunshine side have been commissioned.

No hesitation.

Imagine if we were able to elicit such a quick response in our lives, too?

Does your work feel like it’s suddenly in (or heading towards) darkness? Does it feel like one of your sunshine relationships is setting? Is one of your favorite group activities coming to a sad conclusion?

Maybe this 180 degree turn is an opportunity for you to become more balanced. Maybe it’s an opportunity for you to invest in new branches and find new, fresh sources of sunshine. Maybe it’s happening for a reason and your resistance, complaints, and hesitation is precisely what’s keeping you in the darkness…

When all you have to do is redirect your energy and resources towards the new light.

P.s. In case you missed it, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.

Your Problems

Published on June 8, 2023

It’s the news’ job to make the world’s problems your problems.

Watch too much news and it’s no wonder you feel crippling fear, uncontrollable anxiety, and hopelessness. You are one person absorbing the problems intermittently faced by 8 billion.

No single person can face a volume of problems the size of the ocean and expect to come out afloat—let alone like they can have any kind of reasonable influence on it all.

The ceaseless influx is soul crushing. The sheer volume is paralyzing. And the overarching theme of it all is terrifying.

Hardwired into our brains is a survival instinct that watches keenly for any signs of danger—so we can safely navigate our environments and not, you know, die.

Well, the news is the channel that satisfies that instinct and gives us the sense that we better know our environment and can more safely navigate it. Only we’re getting WAY TOO MUCH information. A lot of which is exaggerated, exacerbated, irrelevant, and straight up made up so as to generate more attention from viewers.

Here’s where I land in the realm of life’s problems: I can barely stay on top of my own damn chores.

My advice? Turn off the news of 8 billion.

Come up with a solution that’s concise—no more than 5 minutes per day. Unbiased. And get the rest of your news from your immediate environment—friends, family, co-workers, etc.

Make it your job to make your world’s problems your problems.

…And focus most exclusively on doing something good in your own backyard every day.

P.s. My choice for concise, unbiased, 5-minute daily news is 1440.

Managing Unwind Time

Published on June 3, 2023

On weekends, I like finishing my days with a TV show.

It’s a great way for my productivity focused mind to unplug and idle for a while. Maybe you can relate?

Here are three rules I’ve created for myself to keep this in check, though: 1) I will only ever finish my days with a TV show, 2) It’ll only ever be on weekends, and 3) I only allow it if I’ve finished all of my other priority tasks for the day.

There are two reasons why I’ve created these rules for myself: One, they are undeniably addicting—even for a self-discipled black belt like me. And two, if I don’t get my priority tasks done because I wasted too much time watching TV, I’ll undoubtedly feel regret.

That said, there’s still the question of how to stop once you’ve started watching—which is no easy feat.

First, I always assume the episode will end with another hair-pulling cliff hanger. Another episode will never make the “hanging” better—only equally hanging off a cliff or more so.

With that mindset established, here’s what I do when the episode is actually over: 1) Don’t stare at the “next episode?” button. Clear the button and let the credits play. 2) Turn down the volume and get your mind focused elsewhere asap. Even if that means checking a social media feed. 3) Once you move your mind away from the cliff enough, you’ll eventually reclaim footing back in reality and have a MUCH easier time turning the show off.

At least this is what works for me.

I’m curious: What works for you?

When You’re A “2” Out Of “10”

Published on June 1, 2023

A student of mine returned to martial arts class yesterday after having suffered from a rough few days of food poisoning.

Having been there, I know that coming back from this is no joke.

After the class concluded, he pulled me to the side and made a comment that I thought was worth sharing.

He said, “When I came to the school, I was at a 2 [out of 10]. I was texting my wife telling her how rough I felt and how I didn’t think I’d make it to class. After an hour or two I felt more like a 3. By the time class came around, I felt like a 4. Once I was in class I was a 5. And when it was over, I was a solid 6 or 7.”

I’ve written about this before and this is no small insight.

The byproduct of doing hard things is feeling better—a bump up on the feeling scale closer to “10.” Avoiding the hard things (or succumbing to excuses like, “I’ll do it when I’m a 10”), leaves you feeling worse or, best case, keeps you sulking at the number you started at.

Don’t get it twisted: we don’t do hard things when we’re at a 10—we do hard things to get to a 10 (or at least closer to it).

Big Plans Today

Published on May 31, 2023

I have big plans for the future.

As do you, I’m sure.

And in the moments when I can feel myself wanting them to become a reality now—I remember that having them all come true now isn’t the point.

The point is in the figuring it out; it’s in the earning that comes from the journey; it’s in the having something big to aspire to.

Big plans are like the magnetic north of our lives.

…Arrive in a snap and we lose all sense of direction. Focus on following the pulled arrow of our compass and we get to take a series of deliberate steps forward today.

When you think about it like that—having a compass to follow or having no compass at all—suddenly, using our big plans for tomorrow as the vehicle that creates our big plans for today becomes the ideal path.

…Directionless is not a great place to be.

Onward.

P.s. My guide is all about how direction is more important than speed in life. If you need help figuring out your direction (and calibrating your life’s compass), check it out.