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Category: Living Well

Black-And-White > Gray

When it comes to habit change… “black-and-white” rules are much better than “gray” rules.

  • “I don’t drink” hits way different than “I’m trying to drink less.”
  • “I’m vegan” is much clearer than “I eat 100% vegan, 80% of the time.”
  • “No phones in the bedroom” is far more helpful than “I’m cutting back on screen time.”

It’s hard to draw a line in a gradient of gray. And drawing clear lines is what habit change is all about.

My advice is commit 100% to whatever you’re trying to change or change the habit you’re trying to change to something you can commit to 100% of the time.


On Thursday, July 28th, I’ll be hosting a LIVE chat on Twitter on the Art of Stillness—and why/how stillness can help us live better lives. Join me if you’re free/ interested. Details here.

Befriending The Ego

“The body is the first student of the soul.”

Henry David Thoreau, via MoveMe Quotes

…And the ego is what intercepts the soul’s communication to the body.

If we don’t learn how to befriend the ego—it will always be our enemy.

What makes the ego our enemy is its relentless desire to choose immediate over delayed gratification. The ego wants comfort now. It wants pleasure now. It cares nothing of later.

And it is in this one main desire—to seek immediate pleasure and avoid immediate pain—that our body suffers. Because what’s generally good for us is what involves delayed over immediate gratification.

If we want our body to succeed—the soul’s first student—we need not underestimate the ego and its deceptive, cunning powers. We need to come prepared. Like a parent ready to confront a moody toddler that’s about to choose violence.

We need to keep our beliefs clear; our boundaries enforced; our strategies at the forefront of our mind; our patience overflowing; and our love (not our tolerance) unconditional.

We have to find easy (easier) ways to do the hard things now, so that we can achieve the later outcome of peak overall health that each of our souls want us so badly to achieve.


For more thoughts on the ego, you can browse my collection of 45+ quotes & resources here.

Are You Serious?

Many people say they’re serious about their goals…

But, when it comes time to be serious about:

  • Showing up on an “off” day
  • Saying “no” to a conflicting request
  • Putting the damn phone away

They shrug their shoulders and tell themselves it’s, “No big deal.”

Herein lies the problem…

They’re actually not serious.

Being serious in the easy moments is hardly impressive.

It’s the being serious in the hard moments when seriousness is actually proved.


Thank you to the kind soul who got me a coffee just so I could “savor the moment.” This post is dedicated to you. ☕️

Renewing Less

A desire for more isn’t usually satisfied with more. It forever renews.

A desire for less, however, can be satisfied.

Eventually, all that will be left is what’s most useful, important, and necessary.

THIS is the desire that should be forever renewed.

The Goldilocks Task

The things you do daily shouldn’t be misery inducing.

They also shouldn’t be challenge-free and mind-numbing.

The things you do daily should be somewhere in the goldilocks middle.

Easy enough to show up for (even when you don’t want to); hard enough to keep you from atrophy or regression.

Get this balance wrong and you’ll either burn-out (and yo-yo) or blow out the flame of your potential.

Two consequences that are happening far too often in our society.

It’s time to level up your Goldilocks game, eh?

The Immortality Of Kindness

Have you ever been the target of a random act of kindness?

Have you ever wondered how far back the inspiration for that act goes?

Maybe not far at all.

Maybe that stranger just spontaneously acted.

Or maybe it goes back centuries… back to a medieval time when a farmer gave a homeless fellow some crops for free—just because. And they paid it forward and so did the next fellow and so on.

Maybe kindness ripples through time like waves in a pond—temporarily elevating each water particle touched by the wave until gracefully returning them back to where they started.

Maybe it’s that temporary elevation that gives us the perspective we need to carry on with a lighter heart; a more caring heart; a more kind heart.

For it is only when we are elevated that we can more clearly see what was holding us back down below. And we gain an understanding that becomes a new guiding light for when we find ourselves back down—as we inevitably will in life.

But, we are not lowered to where we started—no.

We are lowered with new eyes. Eyes that have seen and felt an existence at a higher plane. And once we see what is up above, we can’t unsee it; once we feel what is up above, we can’t unfeel it.

And maybe this is the cause of perpetual kindness. People infectiously sharing what elevated them, onward and outward to the outer banks of society and for the duration of all time.

And maybe all we need to do to activate that sometimes seemingly dormant desire is remember that beautiful perspective we each once had.

Evenly and Mindfully

Filling our cups is hard enough.

  • Proper sleep
  • Firm boundaries
  • Self-care practices

Don’t let what liquid you’ve carefully filled go to waste.

As you would carefully and delicately place each step while walking with a brim-filled cup of blazing hot tea—so, too, should you walk throughout your day with a brim-filled cup of blazing hot human energy and potential.

…Evenly and mindfully.