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Category: Living Well

Greatness Minus Fun

Published on September 30, 2024

I spoke to a very talented martial artist yesterday who quit competing and training altogether five years ago—when she was at her peak—because her coach was too hard on her and the process stopped being fun.

What a shame.

And what a great reminder to both coaches and competitors alike: winning isn’t everything. Because you can train your ass off, push your limits, and finish each session absolutely spent—in the name of the pursuit of greatness… but if it leads to you quitting… is there any bigger loss?

Now, can you achieve greatness without a healthy dose of the above mentioned items? Probably not. But, you know what else you can’t achieve greatness without? A healthy dose of fun and enjoyment for the process.

P.s. In case you missed it, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.

The Wisdom In Anger

Published on September 26, 2024

During a martial arts endurance/spirit test, a student of mine had to step out and take a knee.

He was only out and recovering for a minute or two and then came back and finished the test performing the best he could.

The next morning, I got a text from him saying that he never slept that night. That he stared at the ceiling enraged at his performance. And that he kept replaying the situation over and over again.

Shortly after receiving that text, as I was doing my daily quote curating for MMQ, I just so happened to stumble upon a line that I felt was meant for his eyes that just so happened to turn up in front of mine. It was: “Stay open to the wisdom of anger.”

And this is exactly what I based my reply off of.

I said, “There are no bad emotions. Only signals from inside hinting to you how you might move forward. Beating yourself up and punishing yourself isn’t going to do that. There is a wisdom in this anger that’s waiting to be tapped into. Channel it. Focus it. And use it as rocket fuel to help you take your next steps.”

Ultimately, the point of an endurance/spirit test isn’t to push yourself until you pass out. It’s to expose you to something really hard so that you’re forced to look into the mirror at your inner self.

…Because easy never gets you past superficial. It’s only when you push towards those outer limits—physically and mentally—that you get to see what you’re really made of… and can then (and only then) start to do something about it.

Stepping Into Our Higher Power

Published on September 17, 2024

One of the most exciting things about our path is that we can choose to change it at any given moment. It only takes one proper decision.

There’s an adult student in the martial arts school I teach at, for example, who just a few months ago was only that—a martial arts student.

Today, I just had a conversation with an associate of mine about potentially hiring this student to become an employee.

What caused this drastic shift in their (and our) path?

…A decision this student made to become a leader.

…Followed by another decision to come in early and stay late.

…Followed by another decision to ask to help other martial arts classes.

…Followed by another decision to ask for a job.

…Followed by another decision to earn it.

If it were up to our comfort zone, we would keep running back the same type of day over and over again. We would do the least we needed to do, we would settle for less, and we would rush to get it all done as fast as possible so we could get back to doing more settling and less.

But, if we can keep our highest version in mind… and we can channel the type of thinking that that version of ourself would hold… we can deliberately choose to take a different path… and step into our higher power instead.

When’s The Last Time You Felt A Deep Sense Of Accomplishment?

Published on September 16, 2024

…I got this question emailed to me a few days ago and I’ve been thinking about it on and off ever since.

I can tell you that I feel a general sense of accomplishment at the end of most of my days. I’ll usually have exercised, published one of these short articles, taught some martial arts classes, interacted with great people, and have read a little bit before bed… give or take.

…But, a deep sense of accomplishment?

At least for me, this doesn’t really come from the daily grind tasks… it comes from things that required more from me than I was used to giving. And as I reflected on it, the realization was that the more the thing required, the deeper the accompanying sense of accomplishment.

Which makes sense.

…And brings about an important realization for living life: if we want to feel a deep sense of accomplishment, we must do hard things. Things that require more from us than we’re used to giving… not all of the time (burnout city)… but certainly some of the time.

Because those occasional deep pushes become life highlight reels that you quickly share with people when they’re wondering about your life—when you’re wondering about your life.

And so when was it for you?

…When’s the last time you felt a deep sense of accomplishment?

And how can you get more of that from your life?

Your Dream?

Published on September 12, 2024

What is your dream and where does it come from?

…Does it come from your parents?

…Does it come from your associates/friends?

…Does it come from your social media feeds?

…Does it come from jealousy or resentment?

…Does it come from a feeling of lack or unworthiness?

…Does it come from insights as to what makes you feel alive?

…Does it come deeply and authentically, from you?

Most people’s dreams are infiltrated with ideas that actually aren’t in alignment with their innermost self’s ideas.

…And if you never sit with the question and do some honest inner work, you’ll never know which ideas are whose.

Spontaneous Self-Expression

Published on September 11, 2024

Spontaneous self-expression should be honored as one of the most sacred human experiences we can witness and offer in life.

Be it through quirky or carefree dance, uncontrollable laughter, art of any kind, intimate and/or vulnerable conversation, potent emotional arises… these are the moments when we both truly remember a person and are truly remembered. These are the moments we record into our memory banks that allow us to recall the feeling and image of a person on demand. These are the moments when we/they are truly alive and most impressively connected to the present moment—despite all of the distractions, brainwashing, and suffering that’s constantly trying to yank us away.

It’s a rare and sacred moment both for you and another to experience. Recognize that and honor it for what it is. Surround yourself with more people and in more places where this is the vibe. And don’t ever be that person that kills another person’s spontaneous vibe.

Never “T-Word”

Published on September 10, 2024

My martial arts students and I have an ongoing joke where we, “never use the t-word in class”: tired.

The idea behind it is a classic martial one: our mind will always give up before our body. And so if we can discipline our mind (to push through tired, pain, and fatigue), we’ll be able to better push our body (outside of their comfort zones and into zones of growth).

It’s important, however, not to carry this mentality with you 100% of the time and to, contradictorily, “never use the t-word” only some of the time.

Stepping onto the mats for a martial arts class is a great time to embody this mindset.

When you’re getting ready for bed, not so much.

It’s mindfulness that you should carry with you 100% of the time.

This can be tricky to explain because if you’re not careful, mindfulness can unknowingly turn into mindlessness.

When we’re mindful, we’re intimately in tune with our physiological state. We know when we actually need to rest and when we actually need to push.

When we’re in tune with our ego, however, we start to make mindless decisions—such as skipping workouts because we’re feeling lazy or using long days as an excuse to eat poorly or letting screen time infiltrate our schedules and take over higher priority tasks.

The post-task feeling meditation can help clear things up.

Simply imagine how you’re feeling at the end of a designated task—do you regret doing it (because your exhaustion levels were exacerbated and are truly going to effect the rest of your day/week) or are you glad you did it (because you beat the schemes of the ego)?