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Category: Living Well

Sub 9

Published on July 19, 2023

Today, a friend and I ran 4 miles.

At the end, she reported that we averaged 8:50ish per mile and said, “Anything sub 9 is good.”

I didn’t say it then, but after thinking about it, I’d like to say next time, “Anything done is good.”

Put too much pressure on “sub 9” and you might skip runs altogether when sore or exhausted.

Better to let done be the primary metric you track and allow room for grace when it’s needed.

Because often… grace is needed. And those who can give it are the ones who truly stay on track.

P.s. If staying consistent with positive habits is hard for you (like exercising regularly), stay tuned. My NEW guide is in its final stages of completion…!

Thinking and Being

Published on July 17, 2023

There’s a time and a place for thinking. And there’s a time and a place for being. All being and no thinking leads to rash decision making. And all thinking and no being leads to a sheltered, inexperienced life.

Times when we’re experiencing life are times when we should drop thinking altogether. Like when we’re: walking, running, swimming, playing, hiking, meditating, listening, dancing, drawing, painting, etc.

And times when we’re reflecting on life and planning ahead for the future are times when we should turn the thinking up. Like when we’re: reading, writing, conversing, planning, researching, developing, building, brainstorming, imagining, visualizing, etc.

It’s when we get either of the two confused that we stumble in life.

It’s when we start thinking about playing or meditating or dancing that it suddenly becomes awkward and unnatural. And it’s when we spend all of our time being and none of our time writing or planning or imagining that suddenly our mistakes repeat and our life trajectory worsens.

Like most things in life, it’s a balancing act. One that I don’t think we’ll ever get perfectly correct, but one that we can and should be more conscious of and aim more deliberately for.

P.s. This post was inspired by (and became the afterword for) The Story About The Centipede and The Frog.

Turn Off or Turn Up?

Published on July 14, 2023

Sometimes I fantasize about living another life.

And sometimes I find myself fantasizing about being in that other life, fantasizing about being back in this one.

And part of me wonders if this is just the human condition: to constantly imagine and desire all the other possibilities in lieu of the incredible opportunities that have already come together to give us the life we have today.

And part of me wonders if this will always be a mental program running in the background: dreaming, fantasizing, scheming, desiring, wishing, wondering—and if it’s something worth turning off (and practicing more present gratitude) or turning up (and letting imagination run wild to paint a masterpiece that we can ambitiously reverse engineer our way to).

And part of me wonders if, like most things in life, it’s some kind of combination of the two…

Increasing Luck

Published on July 11, 2023

This week, Mark Manson challenged his following to:

“Do something that increases the chances something good happens to you—this could be doing co-workers a favor, volunteering your time on the weekend, taking the time to meet other parents at your child’s school, whatever. Think of something you can do, then go do it.”

And it made me think about the times when I’ve gotten “lucky” and something good happened to me…

Times when strangers were turned into friends; times when running into friends turned them into good friends; times when I was a victim of a random act of kindness; times when I had a direction changing conversation; times when one thing led to a lover.

And it made me think about how none of those things ever happened while I was being passively entertained or otherwise choosing to withdraw from the world.

There’s a time and a place to withdraw from the world—undoubtedly. The introvert in me knows. But, it might not be the best strategy for increasing luck—depending on what that means to you.

P.s. In case you missed it, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.

My Reading Comprehension Process

Published on July 10, 2023

First, I make a small checkmark next to passages that resonate. This is the only kind of marking I use while reading.

Then, when finished, I re-read all of the checked passages and upload the best ones to MoveMe Quotes—my quote website that houses all of the best things I’ve read since October of 2010.

Finally, once I finish uploading all of the checked passages from the book, I create a list that presents all of them in both a coherent and personalized way. While making the lists, the first unique thing I do is organize quotes based on how they read—not based on page number. I try to present the ideas in a way that flows as one is read to the next… as though the quotes were being read as a book summary in their own right. Then, I add my own thoughts to the collection. I’ll write an introduction, provide necessary context, and connect resources at the end. Once it’s finished, I’ll snap a picture of me holding the book in front of my bookshelf and publish it for all to see—for free.

Why do all of this?

Sure it feels good to be the creator of a helpful resource. But, even more so, because it feels good to understand—to more deeply understand—the things I’ve read. And for each step that’s taken beyond reading, an invaluable layer of comprehension is added.

If you want to really get the full juice out of each book you read, one squeeze (from one read) isn’t enough. It’s the re-squeeze, the re-grip and re-squeeze again, capped off with a double-handed squeeze that makes the real difference.

Make The Means Your End

Published on July 8, 2023

Most people get handed a picture of the mega-rich lifestyle and say, “Yup, that’s what I want” and spend all of their time and energy trying to paint a replica of that picture into their life without any further thought.

…Without any image at all of what their daily experience to achieve that end might look like, without any conversation around priorities, and without any authentic customizations or added personality to the picture. Just a singularly focused attempt to copy and paste another person’s end into their life, irrespective of the means.

But, what we must understand is that the means are the *real* end.

Meaning, how the moments are spent inside the lifestyle will always matter more than the mere end picture of the lifestyle.

My advice? Forget the picture. Focus on pin-pointing how you most want to spend your time. Ask yourself this fundamentally important question: “What does my ideal day look like?”—and reverse engineer from there.

Investing all of your available time and energy into an end without carefully considering the means is a mistake. Make the means your end and allow the masterpiece of your life to paint itself. Not based on some mega-rich person’s painting, but based on the brushstrokes taken uniquely by you, for you—starting today.

Inner work prompt: What does your ideal average day / lifestyle look like?

Living Easier

Published on July 5, 2023

Writing every day is hard.

Not knowing what I think and living without clarity is hard.

One of them leads to far more difficulty and challenge than the other.

There is no easy-only option… only hard now and compounded hard later.

Understanding this is what fuels me to keep filling up these blank pages with words.

And understanding this might fuel you to reconsider some of the hard now options in your life, too.

P.s. Here are some of the other reasons why I write every day (and have for 1,200+ days).