Category: Living Well

A Step Back From Complicated

Published on August 3, 2023

When I first started writing daily, I felt a strong inclination to share pictures with each post.

I knew that images grab attention and might hook along more readers.

I also knew that images can add a level of communication for the visually inclined learners that words alone might not provide.

But, what I also knew was finding the right image added steps to my daily process… it took time to thoroughly search, download, reformat, resize, upload, caption, add metadata, etc.

…Sometimes, this process even took me longer than writing the words themselves!

Which is why, in spite of the obvious benefits of having images associated with my writing, I decided against using them.

It’s important to remember that when you set out to do something, you don’t have to do it in the absolute best way you know how. Sometimes (oftentimes), it’s best to just keep it simple and cut out anything and everything that doesn’t have to do with the core of the work itself.

A single step back from complicated is worth a dozen steps forward (or more) in simplicity.

Future Proofing Habits

Published on July 30, 2023

What’s the one daily habit you know you should build into your lifestyle more than any other? (e.g. Exercise)

Good. Now, answer me this:

What’s the smallest viable version of that daily habit (i.e. What can you do, that will require the least effort, that will still count as a completion of that task)? (e.g. jog around the block once).

Okay. Finish by reflecting on this:

What’s an even smaller viable version of that daily habit that you can do when you’re sick or injured? (e.g. walk around the block once or do a light stretching session for 10-20 minutes).

The goal with daily habits is to keep them daily. Not just because of the benefits of the task you’re doing, but because of the momentum that comes from the streak. Which means one of your top priorities needs to be no zero days.

And if you have the above questions answered, you’ll be ready for the days when you’re most likely to break your streak.

By planning for the days when you’re tired/ busy/ or lazy (which will likely be most of your future days lol), and by planning for the days when you’re sick or injured (which will account for a good handful for sure), you’re essentially future proofing your daily task.

…Because if there’s anything I’ve learned about the future it’s that it’s going to be way harder than we think. And the good part is, if we plan for it to be that way, the only surprise will be when it’s not.

P.s. In case you missed it, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.

No Hesitation

Published on July 25, 2023

When teaching self-defense, the goal is to get students to eventually perform with no hesitation.

Seconds matter in self-defense and any time spent hesitating, remembering, or doing mental negotiations could make a life-changing difference.

I’ve been thinking about this lately and how it applies to everyday life, too.

Using self-defense skills against physical attacks should (hopefully) be a rare, if ever type of ordeal. Using self-defense skills against everyday lifestyle attacks is an all-of-the-time type of ordeal—and thus, could prove to be invaluable to consider.

What are everyday lifestyle attacks? I’m talking about things like:

Whether you should workout or skip.
Whether you should eat the donut or intermittently fast.
Whether you should wake up after the first alarm or snooze.
Whether you should go to bed early or watch one more episode.
Whether you should spend more time on social media or spend more time reading books.

In the midst of these mental negotiations are valuable seconds that tick away faster than we ever realize. I just recently spent 1 hour in this hesitation state deliberating between go to bed early or watch one more episode. And this is just the tip of the iceberg for what accounts for time wasted in hesitation for both me and countless others.

The mantra I’ve been practicing, when I catch myself in this mental negotiations space is: no hesitation. And, like in martial arts, I try to discipline myself to start doing the desired action ASAP without any second thoughts.

Going, I’ve learned, is one of the best means for stopping. And the longer we stay stopped, the harder it is to go. Going quicker… is an excellent strategy to consider.

Big Steps Made Small

Published on July 24, 2023

This past weekend I went out to lunch with a co-worker and an elderly women.

At one point in the conversation, the elderly women mentioned how at one point in her life she played piano. She said she loved it but was never able to perform at a recital. She would get too nervous and overwhelmed and would back down—sometimes at the last minute.

The thought that immediately occurred to me was… maybe it was because it was too big of a jump. Maybe if there were smaller, more incremental steps that went from private 1-on-1 lessons to big audience in an auditorium—like family recitals or small party with friends recitals or piano student classroom recitals—she wouldn’t have had such a hard time…

She nodded and seemed to agree with the idea.

When we’re confronted with a situation that makes us nervous or feel overwhelmed, it isn’t a sign that we’re not meant to do that thing or that we aren’t good enough per se. Oftentimes it’s just a sign that we’re taking too big of a step too quick—and all we need to do is take a step back and find (or create) the incremental steps that’ll make that big step feel far more manageable.

Just as we take the steps up onto the stage for a piano recital and don’t try to climb atop the stage in one fell swoop—so, too, must we follow this wisdom with the “piano recitals” of our lives themselves.

P.s. Thanks to those who caught my “waive” that should’ve been “wave” typo from a few days ago. It was a silly mistake… Or was it a sign?

Waving At Neighbors

Published on July 23, 2023

I have this neighbor who, while walking this high maintenance, sassy, fluff ball of a dog—will wave at every passing car and neighbor without ever bothering to look up to see how (if) they respond in return.

…And it’s an act I’ve sort of come to love.

I notice in myself a keen awareness in how (if) other people respond to my waves. And I take mental note of the ones who do wave back and the ones who don’t so I can adjust accordingly. Essentially, I keep score. Maybe you can relate?

But, when you remove the expectation of a return—suddenly the wave becomes more… pure. It is no longer transactionary in nature (I wave so that you can wave back and vice versa)—it merely is done for the sake of the action itself and spreads the sort of vibes you would want in your neighborhood regardless of how another neighbor decides to respond.

…Maybe, like my neighbor, the key is in the not bothering to check how someone responds after the wave is given?

…Or maybe the key is in getting a high maintenance, sassy, fluff ball of a dog that keeps you completely preoccupied every time you wave?

…After watching my neighbor pull this off for years, I think both options work just as well.

When Awful Things Happen

Published on July 21, 2023

Being a “good finder” can be tough when awful things happen.

It’s not always appropriate to look for the good in the bad (e.g. like when a heinous crime is committed) but when it is, one thought that can help is the gift of perspective that comes with the awful.

When we experience real hardship, suddenly all of the other “hardships” we experienced in life shrink a little and fade into the background in comparison.

Because in comparison is how we measure “hardship.” And not “in comparison” to other people’s lived experiences—only ever in comparison to our own.

Hardship only becomes real through direct experience. Without direct experience, it’s highly unlikely to affect our perspective (e.g. To see starvation and disease on TV is one thing; to live amongst starvation and disease is another).

When I think about the strongest people I know in life, the people who always come to mind are the ones who have been through the most—hardship, awful things, direct experience with the “bad.” They have a perspective that allows them to stay calm, cool, and collected over awfully heavy stuff while the inexperienced are flustering, raging, and cursing over #firstworldproblems.

This isn’t to judge or make you self-conscious of how you respond to awful things happening—or to say you should act a certain kind of way when they do. It’s merely to remind you that, if no other good can come from an awful thing happening, take with you the direct lived experience that allows you to deepen your life’s perspective.

…One that might even give others a measure of support and strength when they go through awful times of their own.

Answers In Progress

Published on July 20, 2023

I’ll sometimes stumble upon something I’ve written in the past and feel… surprised.

Sometimes at the thought (because I have since forgotten about that thought), sometimes at the way it was presented (either in a “well done” or “ew, omg” fashion), sometimes at the analogy choice/ word choice/ or storyline.

Regardless of why my past writing surprised me… it’s always a great reminder that past thoughts, ideas, efforts… fade. And new thoughts, ideas, and efforts emerge… and that we are always in a constant flux and everything (inside and out) is always changing.

Just because we wrote about something in the past or answered a question in our lives at one point before—doesn’t mean it’s answered permanently. In fact, assuming so could lead us in the wrong direction and regrettably down the wrong life path.

Looking back on your old work and at some of your past efforts might surprise you, too—and serve as a wonderful reminder that, when it comes to inner work, there are no answered questions per se, only answers in progress.

P.s. Not so sure about your direction in life? Fear you’re heading in a direction that might end with regret? My guide can help prevent that.