How strange
To feel no hesitation at all
When getting skin carved
Ideas entrenched permanently
Even my 80 year old self
Won’t be able to unsee
It makes me think
That the time spent waiting
Brainstorming
And contemplating
—34 years after all
Was worth it
Like I timed it out perfectly
Like the mixed from the feelings
Like the fads, naivety, and temporary desires
Were filtered thoroughly
And left but only a more clear identity
How strange
To find love here
As I stare at healing flesh
As I trace these peeling lines
As I pat these itching scars
Something—you—become something
I start to recognize
This time spent waiting
The brainstorming; contemplating
The filtering and not settling
…As an outlining
A careful realization
A conversation with my 80 year old self
A constant clearing
Of more and more blind desire and hesitation
Resulting ultimately with you—a without a doubt vision
Of who my permanent person will be
P.s. You can read my other poems here.