Competitions aren’t designed to build confidence, they’re designed to challenge competitors.
When I think about confidence, I think about success remembered. Remembering a time (or many times) when I successfully did the thing I’m about to do—that I’m scared to do—is about as reassuring as it gets… because it’s tangible, evidence-based proof.
And when I think about traditional settings of competition, where there’s one first place winner and a group of three or more competitors, more competitors will end up losing than winning. And “losing” isn’t the foundation that confidence is built upon.
But—and this is a BIG but—losses learned from IS the foundation that life success is built upon.
As I mentioned in the beginning, competitions are designed to challenge the competitor. And what is life but a disproportionate amount of challenge compared to ease? And what makes challenges so challenging…? The fact that we keep losing when we’re trying to win!
See, when we learn how to manage the “losses” appropriately… when we learn to contextualize what’s really happening when we compete (is it really about the first place trophy?)… when we learn to roll with the punches, extract the lessons, and return to our practice with fresh insights—better insights than we had before…
How could we ever really lose?
Demanding competition success isn’t helping with life success—especially if it’s removing the challenge from the experience. Teaching competitors how to become embracers of challenge and masters of perspective… now that is a foundation that will set them up for life.