You cannot have an effect without a cause.
Your actions are an effect.
If you don’t like your actions: look closer at what’s causing them.
The real cause(s) might not be as obvious as you initially think.
You might be short towards a coffee shop employee because you didn’t get a good night sleep.
Or you might be short towards a coffee shop employee because of a grudge you’ve been building towards a loved one—which inadvertently has been causing you to lose sleep and your temper.
Being proactive in understanding your causes is the secret to having more clearly understood effects.