Category: Archives

The full collection of explorations.

Maybe It Wasn’t Stupid Only…

Published on March 29, 2024

I bought tickets to a 2-day event that was happening over Memorial Day weekend only to find out that I got the weekend wrong and it wasn’t, in fact, over Memorial Day weekend.

…Which meant, of course, that I didn’t actually have the weekend off and I wouldn’t actually be able to go.

And, of course, there was a no refund policy.

So there I was, $180 in the hole for an event I wouldn’t even be able to attend.

And, of course, when I emailed the customer service folks, they reiterated that there was a no refund policy and that there was nothing they could do.

…But, said I should try selling them on SeakGeek, StubHub, etc.

And you know what… I always wondered how that might go if I was to get an extra ticket to a really great event early and resell it on one of those websites… maybe even for a profit?

Which is precisely the opportunity that I’m walking away from this experience with.

…And if you look closely, you might find a hidden opportunity in a seemingly stupid-only move that you recently made, too.

I Got My First Ever Tattoo Today…

Published on March 28, 2024

…Permanently inking onto my body three images that symbolically represent three deeply meaningful concepts to me. They are:

1) A tree with exposed roots: symbolically reminding me that the branches of happiness can only ever reach as high as the roots of sadness go deep. It’s a reminder that down is often the means to higher up. And that inner work—work that looks at the darker, heavier, maybe less desirable emotions—is often the means to the lighter, warmer, maybe more desirable emotions.

2) A reading warrior: symbolically representing mind/body balance. That the ultimate virtue—the path that’ll lead to the greatest realization of our potential—is the harmonistic continued development of both mind and body. That one without the other leads to more throttling than gains.

…And more pointedly, that mental readiness for battle (literal and metaphorical) is just as important as physical readiness.

3) An enso circle shaped as a sun in the background: symbolically representing the deep connection between presence and warmth. The enso itself is traditionally drawn in a single brushstroke as an expression of the moment and is a reminder for me to always come back to the here and now. Because it’s here, and only here, that we can each ever truly express the warmth that we were born to share.

…And why not just make this my phone screensaver or framed picture in my house? …I guess, for me, it’s because it shows a different level of seriousness. It demonstrates my resolve. It shows a level of determination to live by these principles that a picture or a screensaver doesn’t quite match.

Completion Clarity

Published on March 27, 2024

Don’t measure your motivation levels before you do the thing… your mind will be consumed and distorted with lies.

Think about all the things you say to yourself before you have to workout, or meditate, or read that book, or start that project, or do deep stretching… It’s probably something along the lines of:

“You’ve been so good lately… you deserve a day off.”
“You’re so busy today… better to skip and get back to it tomorrow.”
“You didn’t really sleep that well… today should be a rest day instead of that other day.”

It’s almost as though that little devil on your shoulder gets the megaphone and tries to spread misinformation and lies to distract or dissuade you from doing the tasks that’ll put you temporarily outside of your comfort zone.

…Contrast this with what’s going on in your head after you complete the task. It’s probably something along the lines of:

“That was so good. I deserved that.”
“So glad I didn’t skip. That was amazing.”
“I feel so much better now that I’ve got that behind me.”

…There’s a whole lot less mental chatter and whole lot more clarity.

THIS is when you should measure your motivation levels towards the thing. If you’re still resentful, upset, and/or frustrated about the self-improvement tasks after you’ve finished it, then, yes, I’d say it’s time to reflect and make some changes.

But, don’t make a decision about something that’s long-term good for you without completion clarity.

Easter Eggs

Published on March 26, 2024

One of my ex-employees (who went on to become a nurse) used to chronically clean and organize when she didn’t have anything to do.

…I can’t tell you how much I miss that small, big gift that she used to give.

In a world where people typically do what they have to do out of obligation (and not much more)… be the atypical outlier who gives away little Easter Eggs along the way.

The work is the work is the work… and doing the work isn’t what makes you indispensable / memorable… it’s the gifts you give along the way that do that.

P.s. If you enjoy these a.m. Easter Eggs, you can support their continued production here :)

Rolling Creative Energy Into Other Tasks

Published on March 25, 2024

When I get excited about something, like a creative project, I tend to obsess.

I’ll work on it early, I’ll work on it late, and I’ll cut from my day as many of my other tasks/priorities as I can to maximize my ability to keep working on it.

This happens when I’m redesigning websites, choreographing new martial arts material, authoring new digital products, reorganizing spaces, learning new skills, and so on.

Most recently, I’ve been rebuilding my martial arts school’s pro-shop.

It was in desperate need of an update after having been essentially ignored for years.

What I’ve been trying to manage more mindfully this time around, however, as I undertake this creative project, is how I balance my time and to resist devoting too much at once to its completion.

I wanted to stay late to finish the whole project last week… but, I kept it to only one extra hour and allowed myself to leave before its completion.

I wanted to go in early to get a head start… but, I resisted.

I even wanted to go in on Sunday to finish… but, didn’t

What I’m trying to teach myself is to take that gifted creative energy and roll it into my other tasks. How can I use this energy to get my other priority tasks done? How can I take this excitement and use it to boost my mood? How can I take this burst of inspiration and roll it into my writing?

While there’s nothing wrong with going all-in and riding that creative wave with everything you’ve got… learning to stretch that wave and balance yourself in the process might lead to a far greater return.

Let Each Blink Remind You

Published on March 24, 2024

One of my staff members won sparring grand champion at a regional martial arts tournament this weekend.

…And another one of my staff members got into a car accident and totaled his car (he’s okay fortunately).

I read a status saying, “I am whole. I am a woman I am proud of. I stay true to myself. I am in love with life again, excited for the future and I find so much beauty in just the simple day to day or the smallest gestures. I live a way higher quality of life and offer love with no expectations because I know how it feels to hurt.”

And another one saying, “I’m making dumb, embarrassing mistakes, I can’t think or function and I’m in a constant state of panic and anxiety yet somehow could stay in bed the rest of my life. I don’t need or want pity or sorry’s, just please bear with me. And don’t ask me if I’m ok, because I’m not.”

A friend of mine just had a baby this weekend and said, “We are so in love and our family is complete.”

…And another friend who was pregnant just recently found out she has terminal cancer, had to terminate the pregnancy, and was given 10 months – 10 years to live.

This is your updated reminder that life is short.

That when life is good—cherish it with all of your being. Because things can go bad in the blink of an eye. And it would be so unfortunate to open your eyes from that blink, only to look back and see how much good you didn’t really cherish. Let each blink remind you.

Going All-In On Experiential Learning

Published on March 24, 2024

I’ve never attended a single organized basketball practice.

All I’ve ever done is play pick-up games and practiced on my own based on what I could come up with from previous game experiences.

Contrast this with those who only attend organized basketball practices and sit the bench for games or rarely ever play games and I’d say the former leads to faster learning than the latter.

…Which isn’t to say organized practices aren’t important.

It’s merely to say that when given the choice between play and learn from experience or practice until you feel ready to play… the former wins in what you can learn given equal time.

…Which is the case for how it works in life too, isn’t it?

Spend too much time planning and you’ll miss the crucial experiences that’ll lead to expedited growth. Things like failing, losing, messing up, missing, fouling, and so on… things that’ll lead to potent emotional experiences that’ll intensify the training and follow-up gaming.

Practicing is safe. There’s much less on the line. Which means there’s proportionally much less emotional energy being invested into the work.

Again, this isn’t to say ignore organized practice. Because the ultimate is the happy balance of the both. But, err too far on the side of caution when it comes to experiential learning and you’ll miss out on so much that you could potentially stand to gain.

Inner Work Prompt: What have you been spending a lot of time planning? Could you stand to learn more, faster by just doing instead?