The full collection of explorations.
I don’t know what the future will say
But I know what the present tells me
And if I have to modify a rule
Or gray a boundary
To avoid certain regret
And risk some drama
To potentially gain… it all?
Then let me just apologize now
To my future self if it doesn’t work out
But what I also want that self to know
…Is that you know I had to know
And I’m going in with clear eyes
For both me… and you.
P.s. Sheesh… first poem in a while. You can read my others here.
It’s ironic… the people you spend time with who make time go by the fastest… are the ones you should continue to invest in.
Not because you want your days, weeks, months, years, life to fly by… but, because “flying by” is one of the surest signs we have of time well spent.
People will occasionally ask me if I have kids.
“…I have 300” I’ll sometimes jokingly say—referring to my 300ish martial arts students.
But, the more time I spend around parents—and get an *actual* look at parenting life—the more I realize how much of a joke it is to say that.
Parenting life is no joke. And I know all of the parents out there know it. But, to those who think they know it, but aren’t, let me just tell you—you don’t. There are as many different ways of parenting as there are parents.
And the thing that blows me away more than anything else is seeing parents devote everything they have (and more) to figuring out how to best educate/mold/raise their child to become a great person and community member. From the second they wake up (or maybe more properly put—get woken up) to the second they go to bed (if that ever even happens)—it’s all about that child or the children.
And what an incredible devotion it is, indeed.
This is all to say: shout out to the parents out there doing it. Devoting everything they have to the next generation even if it’s at the expense of themselves. Not all parents make the decision to parent—but if you did… and you are… thank you.
…It’s something I feel you might not hear often enough.
An observation I feel most people overlook in today’s world: If you’ve given up on modern day connection mediums—be it social media, virtual communities, dating apps, etc—and feel lonely or disconnected more than ever in the supposed age of connection…
So, too, have the people you’d probably most want to connect with.
…Which means they’re most probably offline and doing things in the real world.
…Which means online isn’t where you’ll find them.
…Which means you need to revert back to “old-school” connection mediums if you’re going to find your people.
What am I talking about?
I’m talking about joining IRL communities (like a martial arts school), or learning a new skill alongside other curious minds (like rock climbing), or treating yourself to a night out featuring a performance or event that excites you (like a murder mystery interactive show) and simply aligning with a like-minded energy and being kind and having conversations.
These are the sorts of places where old-school connections are made.
You know… where it’s authenticity, quirks, and imperfections first…
The opposite of what’s made first in most of our digital worlds.
…Which is precisely the point.
I watched a video the other day of a guy in a legitimate virtual interview, answering questions with an AI app, in real time.
The interviewer would ask a question, the AI would type a response on the guy’s phone essentially instantaneously, and the interviewee would simply read verbatim what it came up with.
…And the interviewer had no idea.
But, you know when they will?
…When they meet IRL.
See I’m all for AI becoming your assistant and helping you process information, come up with ideas, and create in ways that help you better do your job.
But, when you use AI to replace yourself completely? To speak for you verbatim? To act in place of your own authenticity, uniqueness, perspective, experience, and social/emotional intelligence?
…Don’t be surprised when AI does, in fact, replace you completely.
My frustration from yesterday’s post wasn’t with the college student who quit.
What was disheartening was the fact that she felt she couldn’t devote 1.7% of her waking hours to something as life-changing, useful, and important as exercise.
…My frustration was with Med School.
My frustration was/is that there isn’t more of an emphasis on mental health and exercise from the department heads/teachers/colleges themselves.
…How can they train people to be doctors when they’re literally training people to build such unhealthy and debilitating habits? …I can only imagine how much caffeine, crappy food, and unmentionable things med students feel like they need to consume just to keep up with the workload.
And then after 4-8 years of consuming ungodly amounts of said items, not exercising, disregarding their mental health… they’re supposed to what? …All of a sudden start exercising, eating healthy, and prioritizing their inner world?
…Because being busy is going to all of a sudden stop?
…Yeah, right.
There should never be a time when you’re too busy to eat right, exercise, and prioritize your mental health. Except maybe for extenuating circumstances when you have to care for / prioritize dependents.
But, even so… we can only give to others what we have. We can only build in those around us what we’ve built in ourselves. And if what we’re building in our doctors—the people who are literally supposed to be the epitome of health and wellness—is a disregard for healthy eating and exercise when busy and dependency on caffeine and other drugs to get by…
…What are they going to (continue to) build into us?
I had a disheartening conversation with a martial arts student yesterday.
She asked if we could cancel her membership because Med School was becoming too much for her to handle.
The classwork and labs and studying had become so much that she couldn’t devote the two hours per week required for training.
I spoke to her about the benefits formal exercise can have in the studying/learning process—of which there are numerous!
I spoke to her about time management and we talked about how two hours per week is only 1-2% of her available weekly waking hours (24 hours per day – 8 hours for sleep = 16 waking hours per day; 16 waking hours x 7 days per week = 112 hours; 2 hours of exercise / 112 hours = .017 or 1.7%)
I even spoke to her about the importance of leading by example and keeping exercise as a priority even when she was busy so that when she was a medical professional telling busy people to prioritize exercise—she had a foundation of experience she could reference.
And she politely smiled and nodded throughout, listening carefully to each of my points.
And then said she agreed and thanked me for what I said, but that she still needed to cancel because it just wasn’t possible with Med School.
And that was that.