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The Size Of Dread

A martial arts student of mine called the other day and said he was thinking of quitting.

The context was this:

  • His academic work left him with very little down time (7am – 3pm school, 3pm – 4:30pm work study, and advanced math on Mondays and Wednesdays from 6-9pm… plus homework time).
  • Because he was so bombarded with work and exhausted, he was noticing a dread that came up when he thought about coming into class.
  • And it was the dread that was making him want to quit.

My response was this:

  • It’s obvious that your mental growth is being highly prioritized—what are you doing by way of physical growth? His reply was: attend gym class. Which was two times per week and only one time every third week—so not much. I told him all growth areas are intertwined. Our mental growth will get throttled without appropriate physical growth and the same with spiritual growth. Growth in one leads to growth in the others and regression in one causes regression in the others. It’s balanced growth—across all domains—that leads to truly realized potential.
  • Then, we talked about being exhausted—of which, I had no doubt. When I listened to him explain his perception of the martial arts classes, he described them as being really intense and challenging. I gave him permission to take it easier in class and told him to make the classes less intimidating in his mind… knowing, of course, that what we reduce in intensity, we gain in longevity.
  • He agreed to it and said he never thought of trying to change the size of his dread… And said he’d see me in class Thursday.
Published inArchivesDoing What's HardLiving Well