…Somebody said to me after an evening of dancing.
And the short reply is that I learned how to mostly stop caring what other people think. I’m not fully immune or perfect at this, but I’ve come a long way.
The longer reply is: I used to wonder the same thing!
I would become so overly critical about how I looked or of what people thought of me that would I typically stand paralyzed in a corner watching others. And it wasn’t until I had a few drinks that I felt like I could loosen up and move more freely.
Then I read something that said something along the lines of: Why do people drink anyway? It’s to change their state… so that they can give themselves permission to act silly, be bold, or dance uncaringly. But this is simply a mindset skill. One that can be learned. And once you can learn how to change your state without the drinking… you can become unstoppable.
…Or an uncaring, dancing machine.
And so I practiced this. I went a full decade completely sober. Not even a sip of alcohol once. And I practiced changing my state. Being more silly and authentically myself. Being bold and confident and decisive. And dancing as uncaringly as I was able.
There are still times when I hesitate or catch myself too much in my head. And like anything in life, it’s a process. One that still has many iterations of improvement yet to go. But one that has taken me many iterations forward from where I was.
And so can it be for you.