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Month: June 2025

On Driving To Get Lost

Published on June 6, 2025

I got to spend a lot of time talking to my instructor today.

Of everything we talked about: martial arts, business, strategy, travel, memories…

The thing that inspired me the most…

The thing he said almost as an afterthought at one point in the conversation…

Was a simple Sunday routine he’s been practicing for the past few months now.

He picks up his in-laws… who are in their 80s… one who is going to begin dialysis soon…

And he gets lunch with them and then… and this is the part that really inspired me…

…He said they’ll then drive to get lost.

And they’ll casually look at houses… explore scenes they’ve never seen before… or find a nice nature spot to sit and think… he said he never knows where they’ll end up… they just… go.

What an incredible thing to do.

Not just with 80 year old in-laws… but, with anybody you care about in general.

When it comes to time spent… remember… it’s never about the what… it’s always about the how.

What Makes Me Want To Give More…

Published on June 5, 2025

When I see a student come in early and work on something I’ve taught or am curious about, I want to meet them there early and give more.

When I see a student stay late and get extra reps in on something from class or some above and beyond material, I want to stay after with them and give more.

When a students asks questions that extend beyond the scope of what’s required—that they can’t seem to figure out how to train past on their own—I want to answer those questions and give more.

When a student is struggling with curriculum and is persisting in the face of frustration, I want to step in and give more.

When a student gives more, I want to give more.

Which, isn’t to be confused with the student who constantly wants to take more.

When the student comes in early or stays late and wants me to teach them a private class… or asks questions about things they haven’t even tried to solve on their own… or wants answers to things they haven’t experienced frustration from yet… I feel like I’m being taken from as opposed to enthusiastically giving.

The difference is subtle… but, in its understanding is a powerful truth.

Invest the time, put in the effort, expend the energy yourself… and I will meet you on the other side.

Try and squeeze me for more time, effort, and energy without the match on your side… and I’ll eventually start taking away, too.

Laughably Small

Published on June 3, 2025

Does the goldfish outgrow the fishbowl? Or does a bigger fishbowl lead to growth in the goldfish?

I can argue this either way.

But, if getting a bigger fishbowl is out of your control… maybe you should focus on making the one you’re in look laughably small.

Life’s Spirit Test

Published on June 2, 2025

One of the masters in the martial arts school I teach at has had a very challenging month.

It started off with kidney stones.

Continued with a neuroma in his foot.

And was topped off with a bicep tendon tear that separated from the attachment joint.

After sitting on the masters panel to evaluate the black belt pre-test, he was chatting with another student and I about how he just couldn’t seem to catch a break and how it felt like it was just one challenge after the next.

I looked at him and said, “That’s what those spirit tests are really for, aren’t they…?”

“Not just to prove your grit and ability to persevere when you’re healthy and in black belt testing shape…” I continued.

“But to prepare you for life… the ultimate spirit testing grounds.”

Because the thing about spirit is that the deeper it’s developed… the more of it you’ll have ready whenever it’s needed. Whether it’s needed on the mat, at home, or for your health. Spirit is spirit is spirit.

And having a deep pocket of spirit to pull from—that you’ve developed from years of training when you were healthy and didn’t need it—is about as close to a cheat code to overcoming the spirit test of life as one can get.

Spirit > Talent

Published on June 1, 2025

There was a black belt pre test at the martial arts school I teach at this past Friday.

There are no superfluous performances at this test—no weapons, no board breaking, no elaborately choreographed self-defense or fight scenes—just pure traditional martial arts requirements and spirit testing.

The goal is to have a guest panel of Master Instructors—who haven’t been involved in the candidate preparation process—oversee the test and objectively determine if the students reach the standards of our Association.

And for about an hour and a half to two hours… they get tested.

Towards the end of the test… once they’re physically and mentally fatigued and have already been asked to give 100% of what they have on each of the required areas… they’re asked to do it all again during a final spirit test. And it’s in these final minutes that the entire test can be made or broken.

Because what we’re trying to test isn’t body coordination… and it isn’t even athleticism… although both of those areas matter… it’s spirit.

Because with indomitable spirit… athleticism can be built… the body can be further coordinated… the manner in which they’re going to hold themselves—even when they’re not wearing their uniform or rank—will be honored.

But, athleticism or talented coordination without spirit? …It’s putting the cart before the horse.

Which isn’t to say there’s anything wrong with having a talented and maybe lazy student… it’s simply a reminder to not put their talent ahead of their lazy. Because lazy is the horse… and talent is the cart.