Month: November 2024

“How Can I Be More Self-Disciplined?”

Published on November 7, 2024

A student of mine—maybe 14 years old—asked me for advice yesterday.

She said, “I need your help. I have absolutely no motivation to do my math homework. Like, zero. I know I need to get it done, but I just can’t get myself to start.”

…Oh how relatable that sentiment is.

What she was essentially asking me was, “How can I be more self-disciplined?”

And isn’t that the million dollar question…

And while I’ve written an entire guide on this, the in-person one minute response was something along the lines of: “Listen. I’ll spare you the obvious reasons that I’m sure you’ve already cycled through your head such as increased knowledge, good grades, college applications, etc. And what I’ve learned from decades of doing things I know I needed to do, even when I *really* didn’t want to do them is that if the innate reasons for doing a task don’t motivate me, I should focus on the long term benefits that come from it—from flexing my discipline muscle—instead. Because no muscle could be more important for long-term success than that one. For what even is success but a lagging indicator of what we did yesterday? And the day before that? And before that one? So instead of focusing on stupid math… focus on this being an opportunity to strengthen some of the most important mental muscles of your life.”

…And off she went to do her math homework.

Inner Work Prompt: How would you have answered her question?

Life Without Being

Published on November 6, 2024

Most of us are well conditioned for doing.

Doing is completely aligned with our fast paced, modern world.

So much so that it’s as though our proverbial to-do lists only seem to grow regardless of how many tasks we mark as done.

…And so off to do more we go.

But, what so many of us forget is that just because doing might be aligned with our fast paced, modern world—it doesn’t mean it’s aligned with our rich and complex inner world.

See, what our inner world needs is time to just… be.

It needs time to digest all that’s been done… time to process what you’ve exposed it to… time to reconnect to the present moment and soak in the experience that’s right in front of it minus all of the reoccurring, ceaseless thoughts of what’s been done (past) and what still needs to be done (future).

Being is what’s completely aligned with our inner worlds.

But, of course, things still need to get done.

Just don’t get all disproportional with it and perpetually shove “being” to the bottom of your infinite-scroll to do list.

…Because life without being isn’t a life done at all.

Turning Envy On Its Head

Published on November 5, 2024

It’s easier than ever to feel envy in our hyper-comparison, media based world.

And it’s precisely this unchecked feeling of intensely wanting what others have to the point of it harboring resentment and anger that leads to so much of our modern day suffering.

Furthermore, because of the nature of algorithms, access to people’s lives, and our instinctual desire to ceaselessly compare—we get trapped in these downward spiraling feedback loops that go from seeing, to wanting, to envying, to resenting, and back to seeing in no time at all—perpetuating the cycle over and over again—possibly hundreds of times in a day…!

It’s no wonder people’s mental health is in such peril. For what is anger, resentment, and even hate, but a poison to our system? And what are we doing but creating it inside of ourselves via what we’re choosing to consume?

…If we want to change this, here are two thoughts:

1) Stop drinking poison. If it’s creating intense feelings of envy… work to remove that influence from your experience. Unfollow, mute, and block work great online. It can be a little tricker in real life, but it’s certainly possible with some courage and creative problem solving.

2) Learn to better process the poison. Like what the liver does with alcohol, develop the ability to “metabolize” envy as it arises. This might include remembering: (1) Other people’s lives are theirs and 100% out of your control and (2) You have the ability to grow and improve.

Because once you can learn to metabolize envy into rocket fuel for growth…

…You tell me how that won’t turn that downward spiring feedback loop right on its head.

The Two Things That Get Me To Publish Daily—Even When It’s Not Perfect

Published on November 4, 2024

I finished yesterday’s post thinking it still needed more editing… that it wasn’t done… that I could’ve done better.

But, the deadline hit and I ran out of energy.

So I published it anyway.

…Which, by the way, is like the sitcom of my life as it pertains to this blog.

As a perfectionist… it never feels done… I always feel like it could be better… I’ve been doing this daily for nearly 5 years and I *still* hesitate as my mouse hovers over that “Publish” button.

…But you know what gets me to publish anyway—even when I have energy and I’m not worried about the deadline…?

Two things:

1) The enemy of done is perfect; “Good enough” is done’s best friend. And done is what this daily blog requires… for no reason other than it’s what I’ve promised to myself and, by consequence, what I’ve promised to those who have subscribed to this journey.

2) Typos aren’t the end of me… As Catherine Toops pointed out once on X, “…your typos are just a trail of inspiration for writers who want to believe they can do what you’ve done.”

And it’s those two thoughts that give the perfectionist side of me the comfort it needs to be vulnerable… to publish something that’s possibly flawed… that exposes me in some way… that opens me up to critique and possible ridicule.

…But also all of the other incredible things that come with publishing daily for nearly five years that absolutely wouldn’t be possible with perfectionism as a pre-requisite.

P.s. ICYMI, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week here.

Never Ignore Whispers From A Higher Power

Published on November 3, 2024

Your creative yearnings… those artistic inclinations… are whispers from a higher power… they’re nudges, winks, hints… from somewhere deep… not just inside you… but from within a collective unconscious… an ocean of understanding that spans a millennia and includes countless living beings and experiences… that something inside you, in some mysterious way, miraculously taps into… maybe at just a straws capacity if it were used to drink from the ocean… but a sip of the ocean none-the-less… one that gives you a taste… not of salt and seaweed… but of how you might better live… one that’s filled with meaning and connection… growth and contribution… gifts to be given and received…

See… creative yearnings… artistic inclinations… in all of their manifested forms… are expressions of our consciousness at its highest level… they become statements of what makes us different… what makes us unique… what makes us authentically… us… they become cornerstones of meaning in our life that we talk about, identify with, and share proudly with others… they become some of the most fundamental components of our legacy… the things that get featured at our funeral… the puzzle pieces that others offer to help formulate a picture of how we lived… the things that get left behind and continue to create ripples into the ocean of this collective experience… ripples that one day might make their way into the life of another being… that just might manifest as a creative yearning… an artistic inclination… a whisper… that just might give clues into the possibility of living a better life themself…

…Which is all to say: listen.

Never ignore whispers from a higher power.

Spare Me

Published on November 3, 2024

Go ahead and talk your talk.

Say what you’re gonna say.

String together some dressed up words and print it on your fancy parchment paper.

…It might catch you a look, return you a call, or get you a foot in the door.

But, what it will not do is walk those feet of yours forward… do the following through on the things you promised you’d do… be what parchment paper is supposed to be to regular paper in real life.

The proof is in the pudding, homie.

So enough with the announcements… spare me the overzealous promises… forget the résumés…

And show me something tangible. Give me a track record. Let’s take a look back and show me how your dots actually connect.

…Words? Words have never been easier. A few clicks and AI can have that done for you in no time.

…Which also means that action? Well, now… it means that actions have never been more valuable.

Unlocking The Door Of Other People’s Mind

Published on November 1, 2024

It’s a pretty special moment when you see somebody have an epiphany.

And it’s even more special when it happens as a result of something you did.

The reason it’s so special is because up until that moment… nobody else had been able to (or had tried to) communicate or convey the information in a way that led to understanding.

It’s as though, finally, somebody understood them and the information well enough that they were able to mold it into the key that, finally, unlocked the door of their mind.

Which is exactly what it is sometimes—a very specific key that opens a very specific lock.

What most people try to do once they know the information, is shove it into mind doors—and hope it somehow forces it open. Or assume that the information is a single key that’ll unlock all minds.

…Nope.

The real key, pun intended, is seeking to understand the lock—the other person—well enough. Once you build rapport, hear some of their perspective, understand their learning style, observe how they act and interact in different situations, and do a little iteration via trial and error—it’s as though the teeth of the key start to form themselves.

But, just because you know the info, doesn’t mean you can make just anybody have an epiphany… it takes real patience, empathy, and curiosity to make that happen.

…Something you might think about as you head into your day with SO MUCH INFORMATION to share.