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Month: April 2024

Hard Reading

I (finally) finished reading Ray Dalio’s book, Principles this week.

…I say “finally,” because sheesh did this book take me a while to complete.

…Two months in case you’re wondering. And not just because of it’s length (567 pages), but because of how dry it felt to me.

What I thought it was going to be were economic principles from one of the most successful hedge fund managers of all time (i.e. when to invest and in what based on varying economic markets). But, what it ended up being were personal and company principles, laid out like a legal document, outlining every single principle he’s incorporated into his life and business over the decades of his work.

…To be clear, the value is massive and there’s a ton to learn from it.

But, to read before bed after a long day of work?

…It proved to be an incredible uphill battle.

“Why didn’t you stop and read something else?” …You might be wondering.

To which I’d reply, I almost did.

But what I always come back to, and the reason I didn’t and stayed the uphill course, was the idea of seeing challenges through.

We do hard things not so we can suffer unnecessarily, but so we can prepare ourselves better for life.

…Illustrated perfectly in how easily I’m able to read my next book, The Prophet by Khalil Gibran. One night and I’m already halfway through. And not because I’m a fast reader, but because I’ve trudged my way through hard reading—and now have context that gives my reading depth, confidence, and appreciation.

…The same kinds of things that come from doing other hard things in life, too.

Driving Forward Your Life

When driving, how much time do you spend looking in the rear view mirror?

…Maybe 1% of the time?

And how much time do you spend planning out your route in advance?

…Again, maybe 1% of the time it takes you to complete the actual drive?

I think these are good proportions to apply to driving forward your life as well.

I don’t think there’s ever a time we drive our car without looking in the rear view mirror or planning out our route in advance in some respect.

Just as I don’t think there should ever be a day when we drive forward our life without looking at our past or planning out our future route in some respect.

Of the 16 hours you spend awake driving your life forward (assuming eight hours of sleep), this means ~ 10 minutes each day should be spent reviewing the past and 10 minutes should be spent planning out the future (16 hours x 60 minutes = 960 total awake minutes x .01 = 9.6 minutes).

If you can remember to spent even just 5 minutes per day looking back and 5 minutes per day looking forward, I’d say your journey forward will remarkably improve.

…Probably in at least as much as the introduction of the rear view mirror and GPS remarkably improved driving cars.

Imagine that…


P.s. Need help planning out your life’s route? My guide (now 30% off) can help. Details here.

Keep Shooting

When I take a shot and miss in basketball, I feel bad.

I feel bad not only about letting my team down, but start to feel bad about my shot.

One of the things I’ve been impressed with, playing with the guys that I do, is that oftentimes, when I or someone else misses a shot, they’ll shout out, “Keep shooting!”

…And it’s exactly what I need to hear every time I hear it.

Because they know—probably all too well themselves—that self-consciousness, self-doubt, and hesitation are the real sabotaging agent of a person’s performance. And if the team is going to win, they need each player to perform their best. Which, of course, happens when each is the opposite of what I just listed above.

…And the best way to get there, is to show your teammates support, shower them with faith, and let them know it’s okay to take a shot and miss—that it happens to all of us—so that they can stay focused and keep playing against the opposing team rather than against themself.

As it is with the teams you play life with.

Keep shooting.


P.s. In case you missed it, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.

Rhythmic Living

Social interaction is like breathing.

Time spent with people and time spent without people is like breathing in and breathing out.

…Which is considered a breath in and which is considered a breath out, however, differs person to person.

For some, time alone is a breath in and time spent with others is a breath out.

For others, time spent with others is a breath in and time spent alone is a breath out.

Neither way is better than the other—breathing is breathing.

What’s important to know, however, is which feels like which to you and then balancing in the appropriate opposite so as to establish a steady breathing pattern.

Time spent alone is breathing in for me. Time spent with others is breathing out.

Whenever I’m feeling drained, irritable, or frustrated—I know I probably need to step away from people and take a deep breath in.

And whenever I’m feeling excited, lonely, or some kind of depressed—I know I probably need to get out of my own head and breathe out.

Virtual doesn’t count.

Breathing is IRL only.

And if you get this balance right, your life will probably start to feel a whole lot less suffocating and sporadic a whole lot more rhythmic.

Another Day Richer

If I offered you $1,000,000—would you take it?

…I’m going to assume yes.

If I told you the only stipulation is that you don’t get to wake up tomorrow—would you still take it?

…I’m going to assume no.

Which means—now stay with me here on this one—waking up tomorrow is worth more to you than $1,000,000.

So, do me (and yourself) a favor if you haven’t already and recognize that in this moment.

…Feel the true luxury of being able to live in this moment—a luxury worth more than $1,000,000. Try to fully experience all of the things that $1,000,000 can’t buy. Take the almighty dollar sign off that pedestal and shift your focus towards the things that really enrich your life experience.

…And do me (us) a favor and read this again tomorrow.

Cheers to another day (really) richer.

Fixing Feelings

I started uploading quotes from Crying In H Mart by Michelle Zauner this week to MoveMe Quotes. And one of the quotes I uploaded today was:

“Sometimes my grief feels as though I’ve been left alone in a room with no doors. Every time I remember that my mother is dead, it feels like I’m colliding with a wall that won’t give. There’s no escape, just a hard surface that I keep ramming into over and over, a reminder of the immutable reality that I will never see her again.”

…I’m sure you’ve had moments in your life when people were sharing feelings of grief and you didn’t know how to reply.

What occurred to me as I was reading this today was, if she was explaining this feeling to me directly… this deep, complex, very personal feeling… there’s nothing to explain back.

There’s nothing to fix. There’s nothing to cure. There’s nothing to correct.

There’s no need for any kind of worldly insight or prognosis.

What should be offered in response is simply space.

A space that’s warm. A space that’s supportive. A space that’s patient.

…A space where that person and his/her feelings can fully be.

Because oftentimes, in our relentless pursuit of happiness, we mistakingly believe that grief or pain or sadness is something that should be avoided, cured, or suppressed. And with the world’s insight available to us in just a few thumb taps, it can be tempting to want to curate some type of wise, logical, rational response. When really, it’s this very process of giving ourselves and our feelings space to breathe that we give ourselves what we’re really after in life… depth.

Controlling Stimuli > Controlling Responses

Every stimulus begs a response.

  • Your phone rings from every call—and “likely spam” is your bff. You must decide if you’ll look, not look, answer, or ignore—every time.
  • An app sends a notification. You must decide if you’ll clear it, check it (and likely go down the rabbit hole), or ignore it (and wonder about it on and off until you check it).
  • A company emails you about a sale. You must decide if you’ll read it, click it, trash it, or ignore it.
  • A friend asks you to do something you don’t want to. You must decide if you’ll say yes, say no, or come up with some kind of excuse or delay.
  • The social media accounts you follow show hyper fit and popular people doing incredible and hilarious things that make you feel bad about yourself. You must decide if you’ll leave it and keep opening and scrolling, if you’ll unfollow/mute/block, or if you’ll ignore.

It’s one thing to work really hard to train your responses. To understand that the gap between stimulus and response is your destiny. To learn to control anger, to calm yourself after getting triggered, to manage your impulses to indulge, to have the confidence to stand up for yourself, to teach yourself to love yourself and not compare yourself to others…

…And it’s a whole ‘nother thing to design your lifestyle in a way that those types of stimuli that illicit those types of undesirable responses don’t even exist.


P.s. If you enjoy getting these types of morning stimuli, you can support my future work by filling up my cup with that hot, brown goodness here.