Month: March 2024

Let Each Blink Remind You

Published on March 24, 2024

One of my staff members won sparring grand champion at a regional martial arts tournament this weekend.

…And another one of my staff members got into a car accident and totaled his car (he’s okay fortunately).

I read a status saying, “I am whole. I am a woman I am proud of. I stay true to myself. I am in love with life again, excited for the future and I find so much beauty in just the simple day to day or the smallest gestures. I live a way higher quality of life and offer love with no expectations because I know how it feels to hurt.”

And another one saying, “I’m making dumb, embarrassing mistakes, I can’t think or function and I’m in a constant state of panic and anxiety yet somehow could stay in bed the rest of my life. I don’t need or want pity or sorry’s, just please bear with me. And don’t ask me if I’m ok, because I’m not.”

A friend of mine just had a baby this weekend and said, “We are so in love and our family is complete.”

…And another friend who was pregnant just recently found out she has terminal cancer, had to terminate the pregnancy, and was given 10 months – 10 years to live.

This is your updated reminder that life is short.

That when life is good—cherish it with all of your being. Because things can go bad in the blink of an eye. And it would be so unfortunate to open your eyes from that blink, only to look back and see how much good you didn’t really cherish. Let each blink remind you.

Going All-In On Experiential Learning

Published on March 24, 2024

I’ve never attended a single organized basketball practice.

All I’ve ever done is play pick-up games and practiced on my own based on what I could come up with from previous game experiences.

Contrast this with those who only attend organized basketball practices and sit the bench for games or rarely ever play games and I’d say the former leads to faster learning than the latter.

…Which isn’t to say organized practices aren’t important.

It’s merely to say that when given the choice between play and learn from experience or practice until you feel ready to play… the former wins in what you can learn given equal time.

…Which is the case for how it works in life too, isn’t it?

Spend too much time planning and you’ll miss the crucial experiences that’ll lead to expedited growth. Things like failing, losing, messing up, missing, fouling, and so on… things that’ll lead to potent emotional experiences that’ll intensify the training and follow-up gaming.

Practicing is safe. There’s much less on the line. Which means there’s proportionally much less emotional energy being invested into the work.

Again, this isn’t to say ignore organized practice. Because the ultimate is the happy balance of the both. But, err too far on the side of caution when it comes to experiential learning and you’ll miss out on so much that you could potentially stand to gain.

Inner Work Prompt: What have you been spending a lot of time planning? Could you stand to learn more, faster by just doing instead?

Aligned Success Is The REAL Success

Published on March 22, 2024

There’s no success without alignment.

$1,000,000+ doing work you hate isn’t success.
30 pounds lost following a diet and exercise regimen that makes you miserable isn’t a success.
Reading 100 books in a year that were all irrelevant to your life/interests/goals isn’t a success.
Getting first place in a competition that doesn’t challenge or excite you in any way isn’t a success.
Going viral by intentionally spreading misinformation or hate or content that you would despise consuming yourself isn’t a success.

…Which is why it’s crucially important to find alignment before you ever chase any kind of success.

Inner Work Prompt: What does “success” look like to you? Are your means in alignment with that end?

P.s. Need help finding alignment? My guide, The Art of Forward: Direction > Speed can help. Now 30% off for a limited time.

Reduce Screen Time By Changing Your Downtime App

Published on March 21, 2024

When given the chance to casually browse social media, what I’m recognizing in myself is that the time I’ll ultimately spend browsing is NOT created equally based on which app I choose.

In other words, if I have a pocket of time to go on my phone, one app can lead me to spend significantly more time than a different one. In my case, choosing FB or IG generally leads to far more media consumption than if I chose X or YT.

…And it’s not like my daily levels of willpower/self-discipline are radically changing. I suspect it has to do with the app’s algorithms and the way I interact with the apps. On FB and IG, I casually browse until I get sucked into one of those never ending reel rabbit holes. And let me be the first to admit, they’re damn addicting.

On X and YT, it’s just one video at a time. And I feel like I have a better grip on who/what I watch and can get closure with clear stops to the end of videos.

Since learning this about myself, I’ve turned insight into action and made this a part of my digital media consumption strategy. 95% of the time now, when I have a pocket of time, I’ll choose to browse X or YT because I know it’ll lead to less total consumption.

Now I pass the question off to you: which app do you feel sucks the most time from your day(s)? Do you feel like the time spent is equal regardless of the app? Or do you feel like it’s disproportionate like me?

P.s. The Screen Time widget helped me discover this.

Share Care (Before It’s Too Late)

Published on March 20, 2024

…That moment when the person you were thinking about texting—to send warmth, good vibes, and just the notion that you were thinking about them—texts you first for some practical reason and the opportunity to surprise them with the above disappears right before your eyes.

This happened to me this morning and it was a good reminder to just send the damn text—especially the warm, vibe-y, caring “just because” ones—as close to the original thought as you can… because you just never know when the opportunity to do so will disappear.

P.s. I started uploading quotes from The Midnight Library by Matt Haig to MoveMe Quotes. If you’d like to read along, you can get the book here and/or you can read the insights I upload for free here.

Why I Don’t Have A Case On My Phone (For Now)

Published on March 19, 2024

I’ve been using my phone without a case for the past few days.

While this might sound dumb to some, and while this isn’t something I’d exactly recommend doing, the reason is two fold:

1. It reminds me to be careful. Modern day phones are ex-pen-sive. And even just one drop could result in an expensive repair. Which I’m hyper aware of. Which I’ve realized is a hack opportunity into my own mind—because I can’t help but slow down when I grab my phone and am increasingly sensitive to where I put it when I’m not using it. Think surgeon picking up and putting down tools at the operating table. That’s me with my phone these past few days.

2. Being “full-of-care” is being simultaneously full of presence. I don’t think you can separate the one from the other. And presence is the antidote to the modern day drug that is distraction. Which, of course, is the drug that comes pouring out through our screens in unrelenting quantities. So by triggering “presence” whenever I reach for my phone, it’s almost as if I’m taking a shot of the antidote before exposing myself to the coinciding drug.

Like I said, this probably sounds dumb to some of you. And if you’re the clumsy type, I certainly wouldn’t recommend doing this.

But, maybe there’s another way you can encase your phone with a sort of “presence antidote” that can give you a similar sort of shot to help you combat the unrelenting distractions that are bound to eat up every bit of your time they can manage as soon as you unlock that screen.

Something worth carefully thinking about at least…

Mind/Body Balance In Career

Published on March 18, 2024

One of the things I like most about my career is the mind/body balance.

When I first started teaching martial arts, I was in the trenches. It was and still is quite physically demanding. And it keeps me accountable to myself because I have to lead by example and be the byproduct that I want my students to strive for.

As I evolved over the years, I started building skills that could be used to solve other problems in the organization I worked for and I started taking on more mentally challenging tasks. Things like marketing, curriculum development, class planning, systems management, website design, event planning, and so on.

…Until eventually, my day-to-day work was split pretty nicely down the middle with 50%-ish of my day focused on mental tasks and the other 50%-ish focused on physical ones.

Which, quite appropriately, is something martial arts aims to teach its practitioners to seek in everyday life. You never want to be doing mind-only work for the entire day and you also don’t want to only be doing physically taxing work that completely disregards the growth of the mind.

In everything you do, think about how you can develop skills in a complementary way in the complementary mind/body realm.

Some examples:

Real Estate Agent? Mostly mental work. Build physically focused handyman skills.
Construction Worker? Mostly physical work. Build marketing skills to challenge the mind.
Financial Advisor? Mostly mental work. Build health/fitness skills to become a more multi-dimensional (life) advisor.
Professional Athlete? Mostly physical work. Build pedagogy skills to optimally share gifts.
Social Media Marketer? Mostly mental work. Create and run a meditation group to physically balance the mentally taxing media effects.