Month: November 2023

Don’t Be Dull

Published on November 16, 2023

I’m the type who likes to obsesses over time efficiency.

Once I discover a way to do something in its most efficient manner, like take the most efficient, time-effective route to work, I lock in.

And I’ll do it the same way day-in and day-out until I find a better way.

Now, because of this, and because I’ve been maximizing the efficiency of my days for two-ish decades now, my days are pretty locked in.

My morning routine is on lock… my afternoon routine is on lock… and my evening routine is on lock…

Which has me leading very “locked in type days” that can start to feel awfully monotonous.

But, generally speaking, the efficiency side of me is more stubborn than the spontaneous, just-do-whatever-the-heck side of me is persuasive.

And it’s at times like this, when I’m feeling the monotonous grind, that I have to remind myself to book something that I can look forward to.

This has been the key for me for years.

If I have something in my calendar that’s going to strip me from the daily grind and immerse me in a new world with new experiences… then spontaneity comes completely naturally to me and I have zero problem doing whatever, whenever, however.

In fact, it’s my time to NOT be time efficient and I relish in the opportunity by going all in.

Being time efficient is a beautiful thing. It’s a sign that you’re effectively managing your life’s most precious resource.

But, as is the case with many things in life, too much of a good thing can make you… dull.

And today’s message is just that: don’t be dull, dear reader.

The Beauty Of The Streak

Published on November 15, 2023

The beautiful thing about doing something for long enough is that eventually your subconscious starts doing most of the work for you.

Today is my 1,415th day of consecutive daily posts.*

(*Minus the days I was at Burning Man, off the grid).

And the beauty of this streak is that the task has seeped its way into my subconscious.

Which means, rather than needing to remember that I have to send a post out, actively blocking out time in my calendar, doing time-intensive brainstorms for topics, and stressing out about the final product like it was being graded by a college professor… my subconscious takes care of most of that for me.

I don’t need to remember to write—it’s an automatic reflex in my day.

I don’t need to actively block out time in my day—it’s already accounted for before I do any conscious blocking.

I don’t need to do any time-intensive brainstorms for topics to write about—my brain bubbles up ideas all day long… because it knows the writing is coming.

And as far as the stressing out about the final product? Well, after you do anything for 1,415 days in a row… hitting the submit/publish/ship button becomes a helluva lot easier and increasingly less intimidating.

This is all to say: don’t make things harder than they need to be. Do less now… so that you can do more over a longer period of time.

Eventually, the daily habit will start to take care of itself and require a fraction of what it used to when you were yo-yo-ing.

P.s. I also published: How Do I Know If Meditation Is Working?

Looking In The Mirror… More?

Published on November 14, 2023

Why do we look at ourselves in the mirror so frequently throughout the day?

Like, we just saw ourselves 10 minutes ago after getting out of the shower… why must we check our appearance again after getting dressed? And again after getting into the car? And again after getting to work? And again in the store mirror? And again and again and again…?

Maybe it’s because we know things change—and can change rather quickly and unexpectedly.

Like, what if we got a piece of food stuck in our teeth? Or our hair got messed up? Or our clothing malfunctioned and a little more skin was showing than we intended?

…I’d be lying if I said I didn’t check for these things throughout the day.

…And there’s nothing wrong with this.

My followup question however, is how often do you check the mirrors that reflect your inner state?

People are much more likely to mention a piece of food stuck in your teeth or hair standing up or a wardrobe malfunction than they might be to mention a sour mood, an unusually short temper, or a judgment malfunction…

People can help us with our outer reflection, but our inner reflection is mostly on us to check-in with.

…Which we do by meditating, reflecting, writing, and mindfully walking or conversing.

If this isn’t already a part of your day, maybe it’s time to make it a part of it. And, like physical mirror check-ins, maybe it don’t have to be so formal… after all, “look in the mirror” probably isn’t blocked into your days… yet you do it all the time.

…What if you did the same with your inner mirror?

Channeling Your Inner Golden Retriever

Published on November 13, 2023

The group I’ve been playing basketball with on weekends has grown as of late.

And a lot of the additions to the group are much better than me.

If I’m not careful, this could make me want to stop playing.

But, if I’m mindful, this will continue to have zero impact on my playing long-term.

Because what I have to remember is that I’m not there to be the best basketball player (I gave up that dream when I got cut from my middle school basketball tryouts decades ago). I’m there for the killer plyometric workout and connection.

And so I use the presence of increased talent and experience as motivation to practice and learn… and do my best to channel my inner golden retriever the rest of the time and run around, jump up and down, and just be happy to be there.

…An excellent strategy, I must say, when learning anything new while in the midst of talented and experienced practitioners.

Show Up and Add A Little Value

Published on November 12, 2023

When I have nothing to write about, I challenge myself to write as little as possible while still adding value.

It’s a trick I use to get started.

But, it isn’t really a trick—it’s the goal.

And I oftentimes have to remind myself of it.

Because there have been plenty of days when I’ve spent hours crafting these 1-minute messages… days when I’ve gotten a ton of great feedback on a piece… days when I was feeling myself and wrote something that felt so good it surprised even me… that could each easily contribute to making that new day’s writing task feel that much harder.

…All caused, at its root, by comparison.

When I’m pressuring myself to create something that compares to some of my best pieces… that have garnered some of my best known results… of course the starting from scratch feels harder.

…But, when I drop the comparisons and remind myself what the goal is—to show up and add a little value (both to myself and others), starting suddenly feels a helluva lot easier.

Which is as true for exercising, reading, meditating, working, creating, etc.—as it is for writing.

Room To Breathe

Published on November 12, 2023

With each reflected upon experience, we learn something about ourselves.

…Something goes well and we make a mental note to try and repeat that experience.

…Something goes wrong and we make a mental note to try and not repeat that experience.

The more we do this, the more self-aware we become. Until eventually, we get to a point where we feel like we know ourselves pretty damn well.

…We know what boosts us up and we know what brings us down. We know what makes us cheery and helpful—and we know what makes us irritable and withdrawn. We know what keeps us calm and we know what ticks us off.

And while there’s no doubt that this type of insight is invaluable to a person… it can also slowly become a crutch.

Oscar Wilde once said, “To define is to limit”—and this is precisely what we do to ourselves the more we “define” ourselves. The more sure we are that we’re “not a morning person”—the more we limit our ability to experience joy in the morning. The more sure we are that we “can’t function without food at a certain time”—the more we limit our ability to perform if we ever aren’t able to eat at that certain time. The more sure we are that we “aren’t the person who does that—whatever “that” is—the more we limit ourselves from ever trying.

Self-awareness is a superpower—don’t get me wrong.

But, try not to be so self-aware that you leave yourself no room to breathe into any new/fresh identities or take on any new/fresh experiences.

One Of Those DAYS

Published on November 10, 2023

I had myself A DAY today.

You know, one of those days where nothing seems to go right.

Like when you try and print stacks of really important papers… and they come out on 11×17 paper instead of 8.5 x 11 paper.

Or when you try and print a different stack of really important papers… and they come out on 8.5 x 11 paper instead of 11 x 17 paper—even though you triple checked the settings.

Or when you try to hurry past barriers set up in an open room by unhooking, swinging, and limboing under the poles… and you cause the entire barrier wall to tip like dominoes leaving each pole and draped cloth spanning over 100 feet collapsed on the ground.

(…All true stories from today).

Yeah. One of THOSE kinds of days. Ever have one of them? Well, here’s something I did that helped turn it around…

When I caught myself mentally complaining (it’s a rare moment that that actually happens)… I decided to consciously try to reframe my perspective with the question: what can I find that’s going right…?

Because, as is the case 99% of the time in life, there’s PLENTY going right.

…My health was in tact. I didn’t have a toothache. My friends and family were well. I wasn’t throwing up sick. It wasn’t snowing and icy. I woke up on time. Heck, I woke up. My tire wasn’t flat. And so on…

Remembering to count your blessings each and every time you catch yourself complaining about your problems is the secret to creating more blessings than problems in your life.

And the best part is: the former ALWAYS outweigh the latter.