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Month: August 2023

An Unintentional Legacy

Published on August 18, 2023

What does what you’ve posted publicly online say about you?

Imagine for a second that all of your social media posts and comments from all of your accounts, all of your websites, all of your blogs, etc… were neatly laid out in front of me in a multi-tabbed browser. No time for curating either—everything that’s public right now is what would be opened for me to review.

Does the thought of that make you feel proud or cringe? Do you think it would be a fairly accurate representation of you or not so much? Do you think this profiling would match what I would say about you if we spent a few hours in conversation in person together?

Here’s the thing…

A big part of your legacy will be what’s left publicly online. It’s where so many of us spent so much of our time. It’s where so many of your loved ones keep in touch with you and your life’s story.

…And it’s where so many of us will go to remember you.

If you’re not careful, you might end up leaving behind an unintentional legacy. One that makes you cringe or feel superficial or one that just plain misrepresents the “real” you. And not because what you shared didn’t authentically come from you, but because it was shared unintentionally with other people in mind—and became tainted.

This is your reminder to be mindful with how you use your public tools.

Everything you do contributes to the overall picture that ultimately becomes your life’s legacy. To think otherwise might lead to patches in your picture that feel out of place and that you ultimately regret.

Updating How You Act

Published on August 17, 2023

The way we act is a byproduct of a lifetime of trial, “error,” and adjustment.

I put error in quotations because it’s subjective. It depends on what we define as “error” based on environmental responses—particularly in how people treat us.

We act a certain way, get feedback from our environment, and either reinforce or adjust. The goal, of course, being to move in the direction of safe, seen, and heard.

If we grow up in an unsafe environment, we may be forced to take safety into our own hands and practice fighting, toughening up, and preparing for unexpected violence.

If we grow up in an ignored / overlooked / misunderstood environment, we may attempt to feel seen and heard in alternative ways. Like acting out, dressing flamboyantly, or engaging in risky behavior.

Individual cases, of course, can be far more nuanced than this.

But, if we don’t take some time to stop and look inward, we might not realize we’re acting a certain way based on expired environmental circumstances—and we can update how we act to our updated environments.

Or, better yet, we can update how we act towards an ideal regardless of our current environments and practice self-growth that’s independent of outside influence.

The realization is this: the only thing stopping you from acting more fun, loving, calm, cool, confident, joyful, compassionate, etc.—is your current beliefs about how you “should” or “have to” act based on past experiences.

…And all you have to do is change your mind.

Sub 100%

Published on August 16, 2023

Another day I rise… another day I didn’t want to exercise.

My body was sore, my eyes were heavy, and my energy levels were low.

And yet, today was another day when I exercised anyway.

How?

I gave myself permission to workout at sub 100%.

I showed up sore, heavy, and low. Gave myself an extended warm-up and mobility session. Took a mile and a half jog at my ~50% pace. Then, spent 30ish minutes deep stretching.

And now I feel great.

Being sore, heavy, and low aren’t excuses to skip top priority tasks—they’re reasons to adjust your pace so you can keep your top priority tasks at the top.

Remember: consistency over intensity every day of the week.

Less, Less, Less

Published on August 15, 2023

Rather than asking yourself: “What else do I need to do today?” or “What else can I get done today?”

Try asking yourself: “What don’t I need to do today?” or “What can be crossed off my list?”

The modern day default is to add, add, add. More tasks done equals a more productive day. A more productive day equals a greater return. A greater return is what hustle culture deems as being the worthwhile reward.

…But, a greater return equals… what exactly?

This is where a lot of people get their formulas confused. Do greater returns equal more happiness or more material purchases? Do greater returns equal more quality time or more quality brands? Do greater returns equal more freedom or more responsibilities?

Maybe it’s worth considering an approach of less, less, less.

Maybe less tasks done equals a more productive day—not just because it was more focused on higher priority tasks, but because it was more appropriately balanced with all of your life’s priorities—instead of just work. And a more balanced day equals a greater return in each of your life’s domains. And maybe a greater return from each of life’s domains is what actually leads to more happiness, quality time, and freedom?

P.s. 23 Greg McKeown Quotes from Essentialism and How To Live Better Via Less

Petting Mushrooms

Published on August 14, 2023

…Oh, and one more thing I noticed from the kid I wrote about yesterday.

After our final interaction and after having walked a few sidewalk blocks away, I glanced back over my shoulder and saw him squatted in his front lawn petting a mushroom.

It was so small that his tiny, three year old hand could have held and crushed five or six of them together with ease.

But, there he was—petting that baby mushroom and giving it a level of undivided attention and care that I’m only used to giving my highest level tasks.

And if I’m being honest, while I was on that walk, I’m pretty sure what I spent most of my time thinking about was my highest level tasks. I didn’t notice the mushroom or the million other present-moment miracles on my path because I wasn’t all the way there.

I was somewhere else. As is often the case with so many of us in life.

Will petting mushrooms add a ton of value to my life?

…That’s the wrong question.

How can I get myself into a space where I’m able to notice, with full present awareness, what’s right in front of my eyes—like that three year old child?

Now that’s a question worth chewing on.

P.s. I’m going back to Burning Man this year! If any of you lovely readers will be, too, shoot me a reply! I’d love to try an arrange some meetups.

Curiosity and Response

Published on August 13, 2023

There’s a little boy who lives down the street from me, 3 years old maybe, who runs up to me every time I walk my dog past his house.

“Hi” he’ll yell excitedly as he runs up to us—carefully staying outside the range of the leash as he’s still apprehensive of my dog.

“What are you doing? What’s your dog’s name? Where are you going?”

Are the three questions he asks in quick succession each time.

“Walking my dog. Stella. Back towards home.”

Is how I’ll quickly reply.

He’s always just as excited to find out as he was the last time he asked.

What I love about this little boy—and with many kids at this age—is that magical mix of courage and curiosity.

There is zero hesitation in his excited yell. There is no gap between his curiosity and his response. And there’s no self-consciousness or self-limiting beliefs that keep him reserved and quiet as a spectator in the background.

How… I wondered to myself as Stella and I continued home… do I unlearn my way back to such a pure and valuable state?

How… I wonder now as I write this for you to read… can we unlearn our way back to such a pure and valuable state as a society?

P.s. In case you missed it, you can read the best of what I posted to MoveMe Quotes last week, here.

Moments Never Forgotten

Published on August 13, 2023

It’s the efforts you make for others when they’re the hardest to make—and the others know it—that become moments never forgotten.

Because average efforts don’t stand out when recalling an entire timeline of connection… it’s the above and beyond efforts that do.

Remember this the next time you have a chance to make an effort that’s feeling particularly above and beyond. It could end up leading to some of the moments that stay with the other… forever.