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Month: July 2023

The Answer Is The Question

Published on July 4, 2023

One of the best things a teacher can do for a student isn’t give them answers—it’s to spark a curiosity around a good question.

Answers represent outside-in information. Questions elicit inside-out information. The two are not the same.

Copy and paste an answer into your life and it won’t be long before you hit another wall that’ll require new outside information.

Start a fire inside that’s curious enough about answering a good question and watch as walls are continuously burned down time and again.

The caveat here is centered around the idea of the question being “good.” Just any question won’t do. In fact, some questions suck and may even have the opposite of the desired effect.

For example, if somebody asked me how they can lose 30 pounds in 30 days—I’d tell them their question sucks. There are things I could tell them that might help with that, but that doesn’t make me a good teacher.

What would make me a good (better) teacher is reframing the question (in this instance).

Depending on who I’m speaking with, I might reframe the question to, “Why do you feel like you need to lose 30 pounds in 30 days?” And let that lead them down a path of introspective work around identity and self-worth. Or “What’s something you feel like you can do for 30 years, that’ll make you feel healthier/ happier?” And let them chew on the idea of making lifestyle changes that are free of finish lines. And so forth.

With that, I leave you with two questions: (1) What’s the primary question you’re trying to answer in your life now? (2) Is there a better question?

The Crutch In “Knowing”

Published on July 3, 2023

To know and not to do, is the same as not to know.

Sometimes, we take classes on topics we’ve studied before, from people who have taught us before, not so we can learn brand new for the first time—but so we can remember to do at all.

There’s plenty that I “know”—that I’ve heard before.

But there’s very little (comparatively) that I’m actually doing—and even less that I’m actually doing well.

When we assume we know, we don’t give ourselves the chance to be reminded—and when we fail to act (because we forget), we might as well not have known in the first place.

In this way, it’s important to see how “knowing” quickly becomes the crutch that, very counterintuitively, can be precisely what’s holding us back.

Wall Mounted Squeeze Bottles

Published on July 2, 2023

I’m in Disney this weekend at a Martial Arts Business Conference & World Class Tournament.

One of my young team members is here for the first time with me, not only competing at the highest level, but soaking in the whole Disney experience.

I asked him yesterday what his impressions were.

…He didn’t need to think about it.

He quickly started describing to me the most amazing thing he had seen that was right in his hotel room—the shower to be exact—and told me about these different wall-mounted squeeze bottles that each contained different liquids… one that had a thick, green shampoo gel… one that had a more white, runny conditioner (and how he didn’t really know what the conditioner was for)… and finished by telling me about the body wash and how it was more of a smooth blue gel.

…And he was absolutely floored by this.

Which made me see it in a brand new light myself—and is why today, I’m thankful for these everyday products that I otherwise would’ve never even given a second thought to; the products that keep me feeling so fresh and so clean; the products that I would have zero idea how to make if I was lost in the wilderness and had to live off the land.

Drive To Play

Published on July 1, 2023

Tonight, for the first time in a long time I got to play sand volleyball with some friends.

It was the type of game where none of us were keeping score, all of us were yelling, diving, and cheering, and we all were about as bad as the rest—and it was a blast.

Towards the end of the game, I noticed an older women in uniform, presumably a facilities worker, who was watching curiously from the sideline.

It’s hard to describe, but in the manner of her body language, tilt of her head, and look on her face—it was as though she was living vicariously through us for that brief blip of time—unlike the other spectators who were very casually watching.

It was as though she was entranced—maybe remembering times from the past? Maybe soaking in some of the fun for herself? Maybe just entertained by the ridiculous sight of it all?

…What she was thinking, I’ll never know.

But, what it got me thinking about was how grateful I was to be the participant in those moments. To be the one on the court doing the yelling, diving, and cheering. To be the person in that privileged position of being able to play the game.

Something I think many of us take for granted… until one day we find ourselves drawn to a commotion… that’s on our path home… that contains this scene of people yelling, diving, and cheering… that leads us to a sideline… where we find ourselves watching vicariously…

And suddenly… without a drive to play.