You don’t start acting like a black belt when you get a black belt.
It’s only after you’ve acted like a black belt long enough that you finally receive one.
The same is true for any other identity you want to embody in life.
You become it by acting like it long enough.
The “becoming” doesn’t happen first.
Let me assure you that approximately none of us start “good” at anything.
Take meditating for example. Expecting to be “good” at meditating when you first start is like expecting to be “good” at Martial Arts when you come to your first class.
The point isn’t to arrive “good”—the point is to start where you are and improve.
Besides the rare few who are “born enlightened,” I’m of the opinion that all of us have busy, irrational, crazed monkey minds which make meditating exceptionally hard.
…Which is precisely why we should be spending time practicing it.
What we need to do isn’t *not* meditate because its hard. What we need to do is better manage our expectations.
Meditating isn’t about closing our eyes and being able to experience a magical ceasing of all incoming thoughts. Not a chance.
It’s about stopping the flow of incoming information and allowing what’s there to settle.
When I meditate, I spend probably less than a minute out of twenty actually free from thinking. This is an excellent day of meditation for me.
In fact, any day I practice meditating is an excellent day of meditating—because I practiced it.
Get it?
The practice is the reward. Just like in Martial Arts. What are belts but an external motivation tactic to encourage training?
The end goal (black belt) is simply a motivation tactic that’s designed to get you to practice.
So, if you want to become a “black belt” in meditation (or anything), humble yourself and start practicing like a white belt.
A friend of mine is going through a rough time. Life is hitting them from all angles. All they want to do is crawl into a ball and hide. In their defense, I think we’ve all been there. I know I have.
But, all this does is move shots from all angles in the front, to all angles at their back. It does nothing to stop the incoming shots—it merely changes the target.
In self-defense situations, you always do everything you can to avoid the fight—but you also defend yourself when necessary. Getting swung at even once is just cause for self-defense. And defending yourself isn’t curing into a ball; defending yourself is hitting back.
This is what you have to do when life decides to hit you, too. You have to hit back. Not by punching, kicking, or elbowing. But, by confronting, transforming, and responding.
Just like you block a punch by confronting it with your arm, you block a problem by confronting it with your mind. Just like you transform a person’s energy against them in Martial Arts, you transform emotional energy into a creative outlet in life. Just like you respond to an aggressor’s attack based on training, you respond to life’s challenges based on experience.
And if you don’t know what to do against an attack and get hit—what do you do? Curl into a ball? Or figure out what went wrong and learn how to defend against it? The latter of course. So, expand your mind! Find the right book. Write to find clarity. Talk to more experienced people. Broaden your understanding. And hit back.
Don’t just give life a different target; make life the target and take your shots.
“When you pay attention to detail, the big picture will take care of itself.”
George St-Pierre, via MoveMe Quotes
In Martial Arts, the direction of your toes—matters. The placement of your hands—matters. The distribution of your weight—matters. Even the height of your shoulders, the tilt of your head, and the squint of your eyes—matters.
Of course, the general coordination of the move matters, too, but it’s precisely the above mentioned details—the fine motor adjustments—that puts the “Art” in “Martial.” It’s the great divide between what makes “okay” and what makes “great.”
What separates an amateur punch from a professional punch isn’t their ability to quickly extend their hand from their face to a target and back—it’s how the details were minded in the process.
As is the case with basketball dribbles, hockey slap-shots, football throws, etc.—details are what separate beginners from masters and amateurs from pros. Anybody can dribble—few dribble professionally. And the same is true in how things are done in any sport.
But, attention to detail isn’t just activity specific.
The way you do anything is how you do everything. Attention to detail is a character trait that some choose to develop.
It’s a careful awareness. It’s a trained devotion to excellence. It’s the rigorous loyalty to the minutiae. It’s a deliberate decision to improve—beyond where most people stop. It’s a drive for inches when most people park after miles. It’s not for the faint of heart. It’s not for the preoccupied. It’s not for the careless.
It’s for the people who choose to be passionate, focused, and committed to paying details the attention they require—in any and every chosen task. It’s why attention is paid and not granted.
And it’s why masterpieces are so valuable—because they’ve been paid for in attention, energy, effort—details—many times over. Details that others find too expensive to pay. Details that, bring the big picture to life. Details that, when removed, would leave masterpieces as just pieces.