Category: Direction Matters

I went through a phase when I was seriously considering opening a coffee shop with my sister.

The only problem was… I didn’t have any real time to commit to being there. And opening a business that I couldn’t commit to felt foolish.

So we put it on the back burner.

Today, I was chatting on the phone with a few friends and we got to talking about retirement.

We all agreed that none of us wanted to do nothing… and in fact, we were all leaning more towards working for as long as we possibly could over retiring as soon as we possibly could…

And it brought back up this idea of the coffee shop.

I mentioned this idea of having a hybrid coffee shop/book shop, that had a quaint feel and community connection emphasis, that hosted readings, author talks, book clubs, open mics, art shows, and general IRL gatherings… as a way to spend the retirement days…

And it planted a seed that I think a lot of us are thinking about…

The takeaway for me is not to try and force something into existence until it’s in alignment with your lifestyle and time. And not only that… but bringing things into existence that you want to actually spend a chunk of your lifestyle and time engaging and participating in.

The thing is… the world doesn’t need another coffee shop.

But, it could definitely use more authentic, real, brick-and-mortar, connection places that serve great coffee, fresh ideas, and interesting conversation starters that attracts like-minded, curious, and maybe lonely or introverted people who have a hard time finding places to connect.

…There’s always room for more of what’s real.

It’s common for people in today’s world to have a side hustle—something they’re building, creating, or doing after their 9-5 regular job because they love it or to earn some extra income.

And with the internet and social media… there’s essential zero barrier for entry. All you need is an idea and a willingness to follow and act on your curiosities.

One thing to keep in mind, especially if you’re side-hustling for extra income, is to make sure the person you’re serving—above all others—is yourself.

People who side hustle via trends, get rich quick schemes, or domains they’re not really interested in… are the ones who not only flop… but waste a bunch of their time in the process… time they could’ve spend doing things that actually served them.

What I’m talking about is the artist/painter who paints because they love it… because it relaxes their mind and soul… because it’s an expression of who they are and adds to the legacy of their life… who THEN decides to share their creations with others and turn it into a side hustle. As opposed to the person who never like art who saw somebody else killing it online and decided to copy them.

Or the writer, like me, who writes daily because it’s one of the best things I ever started doing for my mental health… who THEN decides to create guides, posters, and coaching. As opposed to the person who never really liked to write… who saw that you can make a bunch of money ghost writing and took a class or two about it online.

If you’d do it for free… it’s a good sign you’re in alignment.

…And it’s also a good sign you can start side-hustling with it.

The relationship you have today will not be the relationship you have tomorrow.

Not with your spouse, your girlfriend/boyfriend, your parents, your siblings, or yourself.

Relationships change as quickly as your social media feed.

And like your social media feed… what direction your feed goes depends entirely on how you interact with your feed today.

…Not in how you intend to interact with your feed or how you plan to, hope to, or want to interact with your feed… but in how you actually interact with it.

Invest in better content, connect with better people, better utilize block/mute/unfollow… grow. Do the opposite… regress.

Invest in better experiences with people, take more initiative in surrounding yourself with better influences, better enforce your boundaries and prioritize your mental health… grow. Do the opposite… regress.

Nothing ever stays the same. Remember this as you’re deciding how you want to actually act today.

Looking back, it’s easy to trace the trunk up the branches and through the endless splits to find how you got to where you are today.

Looking forward, it’s hard to know which split will take you precisely to where you want to end up tomorrow.

One thing is for sure though… knowing where you want to end up—as precisely as possible—is an excellent place to start.

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P.s. Here’s the picture that inspired this post.

You probably won’t ever realize how many opportunities there are in the world, until you define what type of opportunities you most want to realize.

To define is to put on your radar. And to recalibrate your radar is to get alerted to what you didn’t see before.

To define is to give shape to. And to shape the world is to more easily identify what shapes fit into your mold.

To define is to manifest. And not in any kind of passive way. In the way that alerts you to when the shape that fits your mold comes onto your radar so that you can channel the courage required to act in proportion to what each opportunity requires.

…Did you catch that?

You have to know exactly what you want (and not what the world wants for you)… so you can actually see all that’s there… so you can finally act with initiative and courage and with a deliberateness that was never there before.

Until then… you can keep on daydreaming and sleepwalking.